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Everything Feels "stuck" And I'm Pissed!


TotalWreck
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All right, it's time for another one of my rants!cussing.gif

 

The last 4 1/2 years have been a fucking nightmare and no matter what I do to try to fix the things wrong in my life, nothing ever seems to change (at least not for the better)!  I'm so sick of this shit and I'm so angry at a god that I know deep down doesn't even exist, but I wish he did so he could know how angry I am.  I'm just so sick of seeing so many jerks who treat people like trash just get away with one thing after another, yet so many good people who mind their own business and don't bother anyone get fucked over all the time.

 

Has anyone else gone through a hard time like this?  Did things EVER get better for you?  I desperately need some encouragement.  I feel like such a loser thanks to the bad choices I've made (not intentionally) and I feel worthless.  I feel like life will never get better.sad.png

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I can only speak for myself, yes I've gone through many periods like this.  Sometimes it lasts for several years sometimes briefly.  It's hard to deal with.  I hate to say it but I think it's just part of life, and the bad times come and go.  Don't give up. When I go through things like this I just have to remind myself this too shall pass.  I know that probably sounds stupid but it's true.  Keep your eyes open to the positives in your life, even if they are few.  I know it's hard to remain optimistic but truly you are never without one or two great things in your life, you just have to remind yourself of that and plaster a smile on your face, even if it's fake.  Fake it til ya make it??

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My suggestion is for you  to get a non-christian counselor. If you have tried that and it failed, get another counselor. There are many bad ones, but there are good ones. You just have to look until you find the right one for you. I'm not saying that's it's your fault. But a good counselor can help in teaching techniques for coping.  Good luck. bill

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  • Super Moderator

"People don't get what they deserve, they get what they get."

- Dr. House

 

All I can add is that doing good is its own reward. Once in a while, you get a bonus.

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I can relate. The first six years of my life were good (as far as I can recall and am told) but it all went downhill from there - long story. There have been a few less traumatic and more hopeful years since then but most of it has been lots of hard work and perseverance without much respite. Although I have had plenty of reasons to hate the world and fall in one big hole of despair I have noticed that when I am not clinically depressed I see things much differently than when I am in a healthier state of mind. It is only recently since deconverting and getting proper medical treatment for a Mood Disorder that I have realised this. I am not diagnosing you, and I am sure you have good reason to be very angry and hurt, I am just throwing the idea out there for you as I know how tough it is to suffer years of hardship. My treatment is ongoing and has been no quick fix but I am amazed at how much more pragmatic I am able to be about life (and how black I become when I fall into depression again). It is also noticeable  how less reactive I am when things go wrong. It doesn't take away the very real hurts I have suffered but it has made the world a little lighter and brighter.  

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TW, it does get better but the timeline is totally unpredictable.  I once went through one particular roller coaster ride that took about 11 years from start to finish.  Got a lot accomplished but also got smacked around pretty good, too.

 

If I had to go through it again, the very first thing I would do is safeguard My health and keep a closer eye on things like weight, because things like "comfort food" and carrying around a lot of extra body mass made a bad situation even worse.

 

In retrospect I also wish I'd handled money better -- Fairly recently I started to unclutter things I had purchased during that period, books and gewgaws and musical instruments that I barely used.

 

And remember that no matter how many urgent issues you're trying to juggle, at any given moment you can only work on one thing at a time.  Avoid multitasking and focus on where you are and what you're doing right now, and after the weirdness of it all abates you'll probably feel a lot less jangled.

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While it is true, to a limited extent, that "it's not the hand you're dealt, it's how you play your cards," the part to remember here is that it IS a lot easier to win if life deals you a royal flush. These people are very lucky, and very rare. (And sometimes, they find ways to be miserable anyway. Sad but true.)

 

Yet, no matter how much of a horrible cruel jerk people are, there are still some that are really insanely heroic. The news is based on "if it bleeds it leads" and focuses on negative things. Still, the very fact that we're here is testament to people making the tough call when it really counts. Without further ado, here's some cases of humanity being really positive, for a change.

 

Vasili Arkhipov (my flagship example of why we're still here, as mentioned above, and he's just one case of many others - that we know of. Cold War secrecy and all that.) So, every day you wake up, and don't see an irradiated wasteland, you can say, "it's because humanity's awesome."

 

Here's a boatload more warm fuzzies, courtesy of TV Tropes.

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Hey, TW!

 

I've been through times like you describe as well. Life is so unfair, which is one reason why I think religion was invented/has appeal--to foster the belief in a just world and that everyone gets their 'just desserts'.

 

When I go through these dark times, I try to remember how I coped in the past. One thing I do is make a list of all the shitty things in my life and all the things I want to change. Then, I brainstorm ways of achieving those things. Sometimes I start with the easiest thing on the list, just to get traction. If there is something huge in my life that I cannot impact, then I try to make as much normal in my life as I can, so that I retain some sense of control.

 

Keep us posted, TW. We're here for you! zLove1.gif

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