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Goodbye Jesus

Review Of New Xtian Anti-Masturbation Movie


SilentLoner

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Great review!

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Reminds me of the time I was at a Bible study in the 1990s and we had been watching a series of tapes (VHS!) by Dr. James Dobson. Nobody was pre-screening these, and this one happened to be about masturbation. Everyone sat quietly and watched it in their embarrassment. When it was over, after a bit of painful silence, a really old man broke the ice by saying "well, I suppose somebody has to talk about it!"

 

The amazing thing was that Dobson came to the conclusion that there was absolutely nothing wrong with it. He said 1) teenaged boys absolutely cannot keep themselves from masturbating and 2) the Bible says not one word about it in any specific sense. If it were sinful, he said, the Law of Moses would have spoken about it, and it wouldn't be an irresistible urge.

Probably the only sensible thing he's ever said.

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What are the Christians going to do about the rampant oxygen addiction sweeping the nation?  Everywhere you go you see people who cannot live without oxygen.

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What are the Christians going to do about the rampant oxygen addiction sweeping the nation?  Everywhere you go you see people who cannot live without oxygen.

Oh God oh God!! Or Dihidrogen Monoxide!!! Public buildings even have Dihidrogen Monoxide fountains! It's an Evil Government ConspiracyTM to keep us all hooked on this deadly substance! Every day, ten people die of it! Won't someone think of the Children?? I pass people all the time just guzzling the stuff out of huge bottles, in public. No shame at all. We should militate against these horrible, immoral, disgraceful, and sinful addictions, of masturbation, oxygen use, and Dihydrogen Monoxide drinking.

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Masturbation, the victimless and crimeless crime that harms nobody.

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I always feel left out of these things.  When do us girls get their own creepy, anti-masturbation video?

 

Or are we permitted to masturbate because we're not spilling our seed on the ground?

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I always feel left out of these things.  When do us girls get their own creepy, anti-masturbation video?

 

Or are we permitted to masturbate because we're not spilling our seed on the ground?

It's permitted as long as you dream of Jesus.

 

This cute young thing felt the power of the hand:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMgd6T5OTvs&list=PLMoKOUBE1Qe9uO_v6LAi-rkN9qn8eDNek

 

Glory!

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centauri:  You just made me watch Jesus porn, you naughty, naughty man!

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Reminds me of the time I was at a Bible study in the 1990s and we had been watching a series of tapes (VHS!) by Dr. James Dobson. Nobody was pre-screening these, and this one happened to be about masturbation. Everyone sat quietly and watched it in their embarrassment. When it was over, after a bit of painful silence, a really old man broke the ice by saying "well, I suppose somebody has to talk about it!"

 

The amazing thing was that Dobson came to the conclusion that there was absolutely nothing wrong with it. He said 1) teenaged boys absolutely cannot keep themselves from masturbating and 2) the Bible says not one word about it in any specific sense. If it were sinful, he said, the Law of Moses would have spoken about it, and it wouldn't be an irresistible urge.

Probably the only sensible thing he's ever said.

So for boys, it's all right because they can't help it, but girls should somehow be able to resist the temptation? Duh. Hence the title, because women don't like sex.
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centauri:  You just made me watch Jesus porn, you naughty, naughty man!

I must have confused porn with the rapture.

It was hard to tell the difference.

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I always feel left out of these things.  When do us girls get their own creepy, anti-masturbation video?

 

Or are we permitted to masturbate because we're not spilling our seed on the ground?

It's permitted as long as you dream of Jesus.

 

This cute young thing felt the power of the hand:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMgd6T5OTvs&list=PLMoKOUBE1Qe9uO_v6LAi-rkN9qn8eDNek

 

Glory!

 Dyinggg

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