Ian And Larissa - Disturbing Or Uplifting?

[pandora]

I am sure part of Larissa's motivation is the expectation of reward or approval from God.   Of course it is.  But there are plenty of people who do these things who don't believe in God.  Sometimes people just care for each other... is that such a strange concept to some of you?  The accident happened at the peak of their relationship.  They were in love and in that phase where everything seems perfect.  Of course she'd choose to stay.  I'd hope someone would do that for me if I were in his shoes.  I'd be so thankful if my partner would care for me instead of sending me off to strangers.  And I'd do the same for him.  

 

I did some digging into her blogs.  Apparently, he speaks a fair bit now.  I'm sure the speech is slow and distorted, but he is able to express thoughts, have conversations, and even walk with a gait trainer.This guy, while very damaged, is pretty high functioning as far as really damaged folks go.  She expresses doubts and has days where she feels like she can't do it, but don't we all?  Even caring for an ailing parent who can do most things on his or her own is taxing.  I would expect that, and I am glad she is being honest.  Also, he seems functional enough to be able to have sex.  The mechanics may depend on Larissa, but I am pretty sure he is able to function.

 

I think there is something wrong with a society that sends seeming invalids to homes where people are left to sit in their own excrement and urine for hours, don't get regular baths, never see a person who truly cares for them or is family, etc... facilities are horrible places.  And I'd rather die if my partner can't take care of me.  Most of these people are much more aware than we give them credit for and suffer greatly due to lack of attention and affection.

[pandora]

Amateur, I do see your point.  My post wasn't directed at you.  If you had known that man before his injury, you might have chosen differently.  I think that is the key here--Larissa knew him and loved him before the injury.  I hope she finds other outlets to satisfy her needs that will not get met with her husband.  A husband doesn't have to be all things to his wife.  It does seem like it will be more of a mother/child relationship, but marriage is just a label.  We all get the freedom to decide what we want out of our relationships I suppose. I'm sure there are financial benefits to their marriage and I don't feel comfortable saying they shouldn't have done it.  As Larissa matures, she may very well find a way to have a relationship with other men that includes still caring for him or not.  It is her journey to make.

[amateur]

Pandora, I get your point and you make perfect sense.

 

I think in the end it comes down to Larrisa and Ian's choice, nobody else's, which is how I started my post.

 

They know each other like no one else.  They have their own, personal motivations, like all of us.  

 

If they have put themselves out in public by way of the video and a book, then they have put themselves out there for criticism and praise.  If, like half of all marriages, they end up in divorce, that will be out in public, too.

 

That wouldn't be my choice, but everybody gets to make their own.