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How To Respond To Unsolicited Bible Verse Emails From My Family...?


Prometheus

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I love my grandmother and she's a loving lady... but she just emailed me a couple verses from Proverbs admonishing me to FEAR THE LORD... how am I supposed to reply to that in a loving but honest fashion?

 

Should I just ignore her email?

 

I'm on good terms with her so I don't want to ruin the relationship but it's a bit emasculating to be put in the position of being unable to speak my mind for fear of damaging a familial relationship.

 

Then again, I wouldn't send her an unsolicited Atheist quote, so it's unfair...

 

I actually created a new Facebook account and added all of my friends and blocked all of my extended family due to some of them repeatedly commenting on my wall/statuses with Bible verses.  It was really fucking annoying.

 

Any advice?

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Well you can handle it a few ways.

 

You can, send her back other  unsolicited Bible verses, or strike up a conversation about the ones she sent in question.

 

For example If she sent this:

 

Proverbs 1:7

    The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge.

Proverbs 3:7

    Fear the Lord.

 

 

Respond with:

 

2 Timothy 1:7

    For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

 

1 John 4:8, 18

    God is Love. (v.8)

    There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. (v.18)

 

Ask her to explain the glaring difference and ask how both can be true if they are both the "Truth" and both from "God"?

 

It might be a little overwhelming for her and she could stop sending you anything all together, or get defensive.  Tell her you love her but you're confused and she needs to explain. This forces her to  intellectually confront contradictions without argument.

 

I find that people react different when you Ask as opposed to telling them.  Even if you already know the answer it gives them a sense of worth.  Anyways, best of luck!! smile.png

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Should I just ignore her email?

 

 

I would go with that plan.  She is being a bad guy here but you can choose to not stoop to that level.  Just delete her e-mails and laugh to yourself about them.  Take the high road and have less stress in your life.

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Send a few back, but make 'em the good ones. Bashing babies or slave treatment or a genocide episode. Eye for an eye.

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Send a few back, but make 'em the good ones. Bashing babies or slave treatment or a genocide episode. Eye for an eye.

Oooh! I want to play!

 

Numbers 31

Let's see here: inciting war and looting for fun and profit? Check. Inciting genocide? Check. Infanticicde? Also Check. And mass rape? CHECK. Hat trick!

Let's not forget all those weird bits of Leviticus that everyone conveniently forgets about (yet takes other parts dead seriously, for reasons that are never clear...)

Leviticus 19:19

So, apparently, no blended fibre clothes. (Better check your tags, right now, guys.) No mules, for some reason. And no intercropping. Also for some reason not exactly explained.

 

(You could just ignore it, of course...)

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I love my grandmother and she's a loving lady... but she just emailed me a couple verses from Proverbs admonishing me to FEAR THE LORD... how am I supposed to reply to that in a loving but honest fashion?

 

Should I just ignore her email?

 

I'm on good terms with her so I don't want to ruin the relationship but it's a bit emasculating to be put in the position of being unable to speak my mind for fear of damaging a familial relationship.

 

Then again, I wouldn't send her an unsolicited Atheist quote, so it's unfair...

 

I actually created a new Facebook account and added all of my friends and blocked all of my extended family due to some of them repeatedly commenting on my wall/statuses with Bible verses.  It was really fucking annoying.

 

Any advice?

 

My email automatically blocks emails containing the words Obama, Democrat or Republican. Set yours up to autodelete ones containing God, Jesus, etc.

 

Or ignore her.

 

If it's only email that's not much of a problem. If she bugs you on the phone about ignoring it tell her you rarely check email. You don't have to answer your phone either. Let voicemail get it.

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Thanks guys.  I'm just going to ignore it.  My life is already stressful at the time and whenever I tend to actually respond to my family's incessant "we're praying for you"'s and "here, read these bible verses"'s, things always devolve into heated arguments, no matter how hard either side tries to stop.

 

It's mostly because my family is INTENT on not letting my go to hell, and I'm INTENT on thinking for myself and not sacrificing my personal identity for their "framework" of how I should see everything.

 

"Oh, but you SHOULD sacrifice your critical thinking!" they (essentially) say.  "You should sacrifice it because Jesus sacrificed his LIFE for you!"

 

But God created me!  And God also created Critical Thinking, so why would He give me a Critically Thinking mind and then send me to hell for using it?

 

Nothing makes sense...

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Ignore it. You have no need to defend yourself. Keep a good relationship with her. She won't go to hell

if she doesn't agree with your position. I think your loving relationship with her takes priority over

any desire to explain yourself to her. You won't regret it when you're her age and are looking back on

your life. bill

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Ignore them.  And get used to being emasculated, especially if marriage is in your future.

 

I no longer call it emasculation.  It is "deference" now.

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"Dear Grandma,

 

I always appreciate hearing from you, because it lets me know you care about me and are thinking of me.  While I do enjoy the bible verses you sent, I already have a bible and can read it for myself.  What I do not have is any of your wonderful chocolate chip cookies.  No one makes them quite like you do.  Do you think you could maybe send some of those instead of bible verses next time?

 

Your loving grandson,

Prometheus"

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I love my grandmother and she's a loving lady... but she just emailed me a couple verses from Proverbs admonishing me to FEAR THE LORD... how am I supposed to reply to that in a loving but honest fashion?

 

Should I just ignore her email?

 

I'm on good terms with her so I don't want to ruin the relationship but it's a bit emasculating to be put in the position of being unable to speak my mind for fear of damaging a familial relationship.

 

Then again, I wouldn't send her an unsolicited Atheist quote, so it's unfair...

 

I actually created a new Facebook account and added all of my friends and blocked all of my extended family due to some of them repeatedly commenting on my wall/statuses with Bible verses.  It was really fucking annoying.

 

Any advice?

 

I have some salient advice for you.   We have a similar situation in our family. 

 

My sister is not a Christian. My mom constantly bombards her with with Bible verses and preaching.  She did it for so many years, that my sister stopped visiting my mom.   My mom is one of those guilt-ridden Christians who feels she must always proclaim the gospel to my sister.  If she does not, she fears what will happen. It's sad because she truly loves my sister, but is scared that she'll be doing God wrong if she doesn't do this.  

 

This is going to be like breaking up with a girlfriend.  There is no easy way to approach this.  However, after you "breakup," feelings will mend in a short while and you'll be better off.  Here is my advice to you:  Go talk to your grandma in person.   Sit down with her, look her in the eye, and tell her how much you love her.   Then tell her that you are afraid to hurt her feelings, but that you have something to tell  her that you are afraid will hurt your relationship.  Then just tell her that you are not interested in receiving Bible verses from her.  Ask her if, instead of sending Bible verses to you, could she instead just silently pray for you.  That way, she won't feel guilty about not trying to reach you.  It will give her a different way to focus her energy, and still allow you to maintain your relationship.   

 

Your grandma may be hurt for a week or two, but her love for you will help her to get over it.   And, yes, Bible verses will occasionally bleed into her emails.  If they do, just write back and say in a playful way, "Grandma, remember:  no Bible verses, only prayers."

 

Don't lose a relationship over your grandma's spiritual fears.  

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Dear Gram,

Thank you for being the good Christian you are. Always pray for me, cause I need it!! Love you forever Gram!! Have a wonderful day!!

 

 

 

Then delete.

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I love my grandmother and she's a loving lady... but she just emailed me a couple verses from Proverbs admonishing me to FEAR THE LORD... how am I supposed to reply to that in a loving but honest fashion?

 

Any advice?

 

Perhaps you should point out to her that according to the Bible God killed off nearly 2.5 million people while deaths attributed to Satan equals 10. So, yeah, maybe one should fear god, just like one should fear a mob boss.

 

Honestly, it's best to ignore such emails. If you engage, you cannot win. Or, if you do reply, simply say, "I love you grandma" and leave it at that.

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I have the same problem with my family and friends who are mostly christian.  I don't usually get direct emails anymore now that most know I am not swaying in my decision, but on Facebook I constantly see religious statements bible verses and quotes.  I usually ignore them, but every once in awhile I do reply in a respectful fashion if it strikes me the wrong way.  

 

I agree with those who said to reply back with your own verses to contradict your grandmothers.  You were directly targeted with a personal email that I believe deserves a response.  It most likely will not convert her or make her question her beliefs, but at least you will feel better that you had a say in the matter.

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Dear Gramma, I'm so afraid of God that I can't leave the house. I lost my job and am on welfare because of the panic attacks that have sent me into paralyzing fear. I'm so unworthy, a sinner, just a filthy rag Gramma. Can I come live with you?

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Oh boy... I got another one this morning!  One of my favorites...

 

"Pro.3:5-6
  Trust in The Lord with all your heart,
  And do not rely on your own insight.
  In all your ways acknowledge Him,
  And He will direct your paths.
  Be not wise in your own eyes;
  Fear The Lord, and turn away from evil."

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Send it back with "Flying Spaghetti Monster" instead of "Lord."

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Keep sending those bible verses Grams, they make me laugh my ass off! :-)

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Got a 3rd one.  Since I'm a natural mediator, I sent her something saying ONLY positive things, so as to deflect any perception of defensiveness, which then could be used against me.  I basically said, "I'm so glad you care about me and love me, I value that immensely.  There is some good wisdom in Proverbs."

 

Then I kind of just changed the subject and went on to something else.  We'll see what happens...

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Prometheus, is this something your grandma does on a regular basis or did it just suddenly start happening?  Is it something she does with other members of the family or just with you?  Does she know you are not a believer?  Perhaps you have not told her about your disbelief, but is it possible another family member has?  At first, I had the impression that she just sent a random email to you with scriptures, but since then it seems she has sent a few more.  Maybe if we know more about her motivations, we could set up a better defense/response for you.  

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Just be happy Grandma is still around to send you emails. I wish my grandparents were still alive so they could send me annoying bible verses.

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I think you're on the right path there Prometheus. She's almost certainly never really thought about her religion and isn't about to start and she'd probably just be hurt by even a simple challenge. Your response is kind and non-confrontational.

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Well you can handle it a few ways.

 

You can, send her back other  unsolicited Bible verses, or strike up a conversation about the ones she sent in question.

 

For example If she sent this:

 

Proverbs 1:7

    The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge.

Proverbs 3:7

    Fear the Lord.

 

 

Respond with:

 

2 Timothy 1:7

    For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

 

1 John 4:8, 18

    God is Love. (v.8)

    There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. (v.18)

 

Ask her to explain the glaring difference and ask how both can be true if they are both the "Truth" and both from "God"?

 

It might be a little overwhelming for her and she could stop sending you anything all together, or get defensive.  Tell her you love her but you're confused and she needs to explain. This forces her to  intellectually confront contradictions without argument.

 

I find that people react different when you Ask as opposed to telling them.  Even if you already know the answer it gives them a sense of worth.  Anyways, best of luck!! smile.png

good advice!

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Excellent reply Prometheus. Keep it up.

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