Un-intelligent Design

[Vigile]

by Di, Unknown News

 

Dec. 23, 2005

 

Now, that the "intelligent design" court case in Dover seems

to be settled, people may want to reconsider their approach in

challenging evolution. Myself, I am in favor of teaching an

 

alternative version that we have not heard much about. It is called UNINTELLIGENT DESIGN and here is a brief synopsis of the theory.

 

First, the universe seems so complicated that even an Einstein couldn't get it all right. If we are to do anything constructive in this world, you would think that the laws of nature would be easily deduced. NOOOOO.

 

For thousands of years, people were in fear of demons who made them sick, and they burned people at stakes, and sacrificed animals to cure themselves, when really tiny little organisms that they couldn't see were killing them. Who makes something that can make people shrivel up and die a painful death INVISIBLE? Only a dum-dum of gigantic proportions.

 

Once we worshipped gods that we thought controlled the wind, thunder and volcanic eruptions. It was a real chore since the gods always seemed to be getting into fights with each other and took it out on us. All this was because we didn’t understand the simple facts of meteorology. Not until just recently and we still can’t get it right. Who would create a world where you can not figure out if your crops are going to fail or if your town is going to be swallowed up by volcanic ash overnight? Only a real dodo!

 

Now, look at the animal kingdom. See how violent nature is, with little creatures being eaten up by bigger animals that are eaten up by even bigger creatures. Yech! Only a real loser would make a world where pain and suffering is caused to some creature just so some other creature won’t starve. Loser!

 

What about all those stars and constellations that we see on a clear night? They encompass million and million and millions of tons of stuff that have no purpose at all but to give a little twinkle in our sky. This incredible wastefulness could only come from a real airhead.

 

To clinch the theory, consider all the trouble that humanity has gone through, trying to learn about the world, struggling to find reason amidst superstition and chaos, using our intelligence to protect ourselves from our natural enemies, reaching out outside of our small world to gain perspective -- just to have a small group of fanatics chuck it all away! Madness. Only a real bozo would design a world that would allow this.

 

So, I think it is just common sense that the world was designed by a dum-dum, a dodo, a loser, an airhead, or a bozo -- in other words, a really UNINTELLIGENT DESIGNER, and I think that every American kid has the right to know this. So, please, at the next school meeting, bring up the theory of UNINTELLIGENT DESIGN as an alternative to the theory of evolution.

 

Without UNINTELLIGENT DESIGN, children will grow up believing that the stupidity of our world -- the insane wars, the madness of torture, the destruction of the environment, the dissolution of civil rights, the suffering of the poor -- could have happened by chance. And that would be a sin -- in anybody’s book.

 

http://www.unknownnews.org/051223a-Di.html

[MQTA]

What about all those stars and constellations that we see on a clear night? They encompass million and million and millions of tons of stuff that have no purpose at all but to give a little twinkle in our sky. This incredible wastefulness could only come from a real airhead.

 

trillions upon trillions upon trillion trillions

 

 

 

Cool site! thanks for sharing. I don't think this would last long on CF, maybe I'll just post the link.

 

 

CF Thread

[HadouKen24]

 

Hilarious.