Reasons For Being Angry With Xianity

[FreeThinkerNZ]

I guess I have several reasons, and I'm finding that the anger comes and goes, I guess that's just a normal part of the deconversion process, huh.

 

At the moment the main reason I am feeling angry with xianity is that I fell for a hoax.  I can rationalise some of it away by saying I was a child who was indoctrinated by trusted adults.  But then, I am responsible for being hoaxed twice as an adult.

 

So yeah, it makes me incredibly angry at the religion for being such an elaborate hoax capable of drawing in me and millions of others. 

 

And quite angry at myself for being gullible.  Part of that gullibility is genetic - I have Aspergers, which leads to more gullibility than the general population - and part of that gullibility is environmental, from being raised in a xian home and not taught critical thinking.

 

I am pleased and relieved to not be gullible about xianity anymore.  But I'm also angry that I was hoaxed.  Really angry.

 

Can anyone relate?

[DoubtingNate]

While I own my life choices and can't really blame anyone else, I wish there had been an honest, rational adult in my life when I was in college who could have talked me out of taking out student loans for a Bible degree.

[Roz]

I don't believe I'll get over my anger at christianity. 

 

Not christians, but christianity.  I view it as a plague that continually brainwashes the generations to come. 

[Guest afireinside]

I'm angry at the guilt and fear it imposes on people, especially children. I'm angry at the money that is given to these churches by people who are struggling financially and told to trust God to reward them with more. When the blessings don't come(they don't apart from coincidence) the churches say it's our lack of faith or some failure on our part. We get poorer as leaders of the church get richer and take trips overseas paid for by the struggling members of their congregation. Isn't it fraud when empty promises are made to take peoples hard earned money?.

[mymistake]

Oh I had terrible anger at first.  It takes some time to work though it but the anger fades.

[RipVanWinkle]

I was talking to my adult son yesterday after we attended the Easter service at my wife's church. He is not a Xtian and I don't believe he ever was. I was telling him one of the obvious human errors in the bible. I told him how the prophesy that jesus' mother was going to be a virgin was a mistake in translation (or on purpose-I don't know) of the OT in Hebrew to the Greek version. He said that all of the inconsistencies and mistakes in the bible didn't really interest him because he already knew it was myth anyway. He knew that from common sense and he didn't need anything more.  

 

He's not angry. He's amused. Makes sense to me. He wasn't fooled like I was. I feel like I bought the London bridge. I have to accept that I was not smart enough to sense the fraud. But I sure am proud of my son.   bill

[par4dcourse]

Anger is a good fling, but don't let it move in with you. Bugger to live with!

 

Like MM, I've been out a long time and there's little anger left. I replaced it with ridicule and much laughter. Religion is so full of scandals and theivery and ludicrous claims, yet still they follow.

[Roz]

It's not that anger is consuming me, but it's the exact same anger I feel when I hear about pedo priests being shielded by the most powerful christian sect of all time. 

 

I'm glad I could get out while drawing breath, my morning prayers are now just time spent being grateful for what I have and the fellow humans I share my life with. 

 

The anger is, for lack of a better term, righteous indignation that I think is natural for anyone to have when they see an atrocity committed. 

[BlindersRemoved]

I also had a great deal of anger when I first deconverted. Now I would call it frustration at how people throw out all rational thought to believe this bullshit. I have a coworker that has cancer. He damn near died and went through extensive treatments for about 7 months. The latest therapy has significantly increased his life expectancy. But when you talk to him, it's all god this and god that. "God has a plan. He's not done with me yet." I guess it has nothing to do with modern medicine. If he had gone into a monastery, prayed for 6 months and come out healed, then talk to me about god.

[xtify]

It's not that anger is consuming me, but it's the exact same anger I feel when I hear about pedo priests being shielded by the most powerful christian sect of all time. 

 

I'm glad I could get out while drawing breath, my morning prayers are now just time spent being grateful for what I have and the fellow humans I share my life with. 

 

The anger is, for lack of a better term, righteous indignation that I think is natural for anyone to have when they see an atrocity committed. 

 

I feel the same, Roz.  You said it so well.

[Deidre]

Not so much anymore, but I blame Christianity for making me too accepting of bad behaviors, namely when dating men. I 'forgave' over and over, past a point of it even making rational sense to any logical person. Christianity teaches to turn the other cheek etc, and that, I did, to the detriment of my dignity, at times. Having let go of religion completely,I now look at people for face value. I give what I get. Not to say if someone is mean, I am mean in return, no. More that if someone is mean to me, I cut him/her immediately out of my life. Barring a heartfelt apology, they will never get back in. I have clear boundaries now, and perhaps, at times, can come across as guarded with men. But, I don't care. I put up with far too much bad stuff when I was Christan. Now, in my 30's, I have no desire to tolerate anything that is beneath what I deserve. If I treat people with respect, I expect it in return. Christianity teaches to make excuses for bad behavior all too often, and it's nice now to only have people in my life who care about me. It's great to set boundaries now, and not feel guilty over them the way religion made me feel.

[TheRedneckProfessor]

It's hard to stay mad at a virus.

[DarkHorse]

I'm still in the terrible anger stage. I feel like snapping at everyone who even mentions the bible, religion and Christianity in a good way. I also feel I gave up a hell of a lot in my life due to that religion, and some of the crap that happened to me was because I was told that standing up for yourself isn't necessary, let people treat you like dirt. "God will stand up for you". All the guilt, frustration, condemnation and confusion became a part of me, and I still feel the after effects of that poison. Thankfully, it's slowly leaving my system. But what causes the most anger? The fact that I can see how this nonsense is affecting family and friends, with all sorts of negative consequences. And we all know that trying to talk common sense into a christian, is one of the hardest feats. As someone in another thread stated, the "Jesus goggles" are firmly in place.

[FreeThinkerNZ]

It's hard to stay mad at a virus.

I'm finding it remarkably easy, Prof.  Didn't you, at first?

[Woodsy]

The anger is part of the deconversion process and it does get better.  I look back at my life with a little bit of sadness and regret now.  I didn't know how to be a critical thinker since all my thinking was done for me by the church.  My biggest regret was that I let them do it.  Now, I am in a place where I am finally able to find and be myself and make those critical choices.  It is a place of freedom and peace and I am just loving it! 

[Blue elephant]

It was the same feeling of anger as being conned by a pyramid scheme for me.

[Guest MadameX]

It is infuriating. Mostly I think we are dismayed at those who raised us and lied to us as gullible, trusting children. 

 

I am just glad we exist in the times we do; not so long ago, this kind of questioning would have gotten us roasted like marshmallows.

[Sophrosyne]

Yes, I can relate. It annoys me sometimes, how easily I fell for it. I look back and think how narrow minded and naive I was, and sometimes it's hard to understand how I went about all of it without questioning it.

The story of god creating the earth didn't even sound crazy to me at that time, it seemed normal since all my family and friends believed it too.

They made atheist views sound hopeless and stupid, but in reality non believers are thinking more than most Christians do. Christians don't question, they just accept things with "faith"... I can't believe I let myself believe what the church fed me in the past, without even doubting it much. It was lame, but I'm done with it. I'm happy right now, with my lack of belief. I feel free.

 

I believe you will find peace in the future. You'll just be content with it, you won't be looking back to your old beliefs. You'll let go of the anger/hurt. The de-conversion process takes time.

[TheRedneckProfessor]

 

It's hard to stay mad at a virus.

I'm finding it remarkably easy, Prof.  Didn't you, at first?

 

I found it very easy to be angry at the people who indoctrinated me.  I felt like I had been lied to and betrayed by them my entire life.  But being angry at the lies themselves, or at the god who doesn't exist, seemed irrational to me.  That's not to say I don't understand what you're going through.  I just had a different experience.  Eventually, I learned to channel my anger into action.

[Pantophobia]

I enjoyed being angry because, for the first time in my life, I didn't feel that it was a sin or wrong to be angry, or that I would be punished for it. After a lifetime of hearing "Just let it go!" or "That's not a very loving attitude," I've really enjoyed the vitriolic rage-fests. Of course, considering my history as an academic and as an activist, what ProfRed said also holds true (and is an important point): it's also been fun to channel that rage into productive action. You thought I was a bitch before, patriarchal Christians? You ain't seen nuthin' yet!

[FreeThinkerNZ]

I believe you will find peace in the future. You'll just be content with it, you won't be looking back to your old beliefs. You'll let go of the anger/hurt. The de-conversion process takes time.

Thank you, I am looking forward to that.

 

 

 

It's hard to stay mad at a virus.

I'm finding it remarkably easy, Prof.  Didn't you, at first?

 

I found it very easy to be angry at the people who indoctrinated me.  I felt like I had been lied to and betrayed by them my entire life.  But being angry at the lies themselves, or at the god who doesn't exist, seemed irrational to me.  That's not to say I don't understand what you're going through.  I just had a different experience.  Eventually, I learned to channel my anger into action.

 

I try not to be angry with my parents, because I see them as fellow victims of the virus, and they are not abusing me with religion nowadays.  I'm not angry with god, because none exists.  I think I am angry that humans are prone to believing in the supernatural, and I am angry at religion/monotheism for being the outward expression of that.  It's a human failing, and those of us who break free of it are the lucky ones.

 

I am looking forward to learning how to channel my anger into action in some way.  The two things I am most passionate about are freethought and feminism, so that's probably where I could start.  For now I am just letting the feelings bubble up and be felt, and waiting for them to subside.

 

I enjoyed being angry because, for the first time in my life, I didn't feel that it was a sin or wrong to be angry, or that I would be punished for it. After a lifetime of hearing "Just let it go!" or "That's not a very loving attitude," I've really enjoyed the vitriolic rage-fests. Of course, considering my history as an academic and as an activist, what ProfRed said also holds true (and is an important point): it's also been fun to channel that rage into productive action. You thought I was a bitch before, patriarchal Christians? You ain't seen nuthin' yet!

I so get what you mean about being allowed to be angry for the first time.  I've spent my life largely suppressing my anger.  No surprise that I have had some health issues as a result.

 

I've seen hints of your productive action in some recent posts of yours, very impressive.  Informative and entertaining too.

[DarkHorse]

I enjoyed being angry because, for the first time in my life, I didn't feel that it was a sin or wrong to be angry, or that I would be punished for it. After a lifetime of hearing "Just let it go!" or "That's not a very loving attitude," I've really enjoyed the vitriolic rage-fests. Of course, considering my history as an academic and as an activist, what ProfRed said also holds true (and is an important point): it's also been fun to channel that rage into productive action. You thought I was a bitch before, patriarchal Christians? You ain't seen nuthin' yet!

Not being allowed to express negative emotions, especially anger is why I believe the majority of Christians have mental health issues such as depression. It's also conducive to other diseases. It feels good to not feel guilty about feeling these emotions.

[TheRedneckProfessor]

I try not to be angry with my parents, because I see them as fellow victims of the virus, and they are not abusing me with religion nowadays.  I'm not angry with god, because none exists.  I think I am angry that humans are prone to believing in the supernatural, and I am angry at religion/monotheism for being the outward expression of that.  It's a human failing, and those of us who break free of it are the lucky ones.

I can definitely understand what you are saying here.  The stupidity of religion and people's gullibility towards it.  You may want to do a little research on the genetic basis of belief.  Google search "the god gene" or "the god part of the brain".  The latest research suggests that our brains are hard-wired through genetics to accept belief in the supernatural as a means of dealing with our own mortality.  Understanding it might help you feel less angry about it.  You might also get a few ideas on how to channel your anger from your research.

[FreeThinkerNZ]

 

I try not to be angry with my parents, because I see them as fellow victims of the virus, and they are not abusing me with religion nowadays.  I'm not angry with god, because none exists.  I think I am angry that humans are prone to believing in the supernatural, and I am angry at religion/monotheism for being the outward expression of that.  It's a human failing, and those of us who break free of it are the lucky ones.

I can definitely understand what you are saying here.  The stupidity of religion and people's gullibility towards it.  You may want to do a little research on the genetic basis of belief.  Google search "the god gene" or "the god part of the brain".  The latest research suggests that our brains are hard-wired through genetics to accept belief in the supernatural as a means of dealing with our own mortality.  Understanding it might help you feel less angry about it.  You might also get a few ideas on how to channel your anger from your research.

 

Thank you, I will look up that information.

[amateur]

I went through a time feeling stupid for believing such things.  But really, you were presented with xianity as a fact and you accepted that in good faith (pun intended) and in a trusting way.  Perhaps you learned xianity from your parents, who were (are) also duped.  But someone down the line knew that they were using people and selling a lie and THAT is the person that should feel bad for doing something wrong.  

 

If I'm your friend and ask for a loan of $100, that it's an emergency and I need it now and I promise to pay you back, but then you never see me or your $100 again, you shouldn't feel stupid.  I'm the one who purposefully took advantage of your friendship and your trust and I knew I was going to steal that $100 from you.  However, if you keep loaning everybody money who asks you, and they start seeing you as an easy mark, THEN you can feel stupid.

 

I would take all this as a lesson.  You were duped.  You were used.  But you did your part with integrity and in good faith.  Do NOT keep joining churches expecting to find some great answer.  Do NOT join other organizations (like Amway) that are selling something that's too good to be true.  You can use this experience to help others with questions or who are deconverting, and you can use it to add your voice here which is helpful to all of us.