Amethyst Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 My stepmom found my live journal and completely overreacted because I said my dad was in India. She thinks that somehow, someone can magically find her street address just because I wrote that. While they might be able to find mine using my ISP addy, I doubt that they would be able to find hers. And why? I haven't given them a reason to "track her down". I haven't said anything like "oh, and here's my bank account info, come and get it," or "my parents won the lottery" (which they haven't), or anything stupid like that. She is just being paranoid. Now I'm debating moving my live journal to a new user name because she's trying to dictate that I don't write anything about my personal life, just because she's paranoid about some random stranger breaking into her house for no reason. I have the right to write anything I want to. Um, hello, that's exactly what journals and blogs are for!!! On LJ, you can write anything you want to, as long as it doesn't break any laws or go against the Terms of Service. Writing about my personal life and mentioning that my dad is in India most certainly doesn't break the TOS, as much as she might want it to. And as a writer, I value freedom of speech among all else. I don't take kindly to people ordering me what to write or what not to write about as if I were a 10-year-old child who doesn't know anything. I am a 30-year-old adult and quite capable of making my own choices, which she hasn't quite figured out yet. My options are: 1. Move the live journal to another user name, which I'm reluctant to do because I've got several months paid left on my old journal. But I'm willing to give up the paid time if I have to. 2. Make everything friends only, which I'm reluctant to do because I want to gain readers, not lose them. 3. Make my personal posts friends only, the problem of which is that after several months of my stepmom not saying anything, I end up letting it slide. Then she inevitably finds my journal again and I have to clamp down again. 4. Stop posting online, which I'm not willing to do because it's how I keep up with my friends. The first option would probably be my best bet, I think. That way, I don't have to worry about her finding it. Any other suggestions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Neil Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 She's definitely overreacting. The chances of someone monitoring your journal, waiting for your or someone close to you to go out of time is relatively non-existant. And then you'd have to assume that the guy was enough of a tech nerd to actually use your IP address to track down your street address, and even then, it would have to be there for him to get. I believe that LiveJournal doesn't post IP addresses along with your entries, unless you have that feature turned on. Besides, most people, if they're going to rob your house, they don't pick someone at random like that. Usually, it's someone closeby, and they monitor the house for activity before breaking in. Burglars don't like having people around. As long as someone's there, they won't bother. And if they do start to break in, and someone's there, they usually run away. Burglars shouldn't be confused with homocidal psychopaths. They just want your stuff. They don't want to be fugatives. Even if you left an entry that said that you and everyone in your household would be out of town for two weeks, I wouldn't worry too much about it. I wouldn't do that, but I wouldn't worry about it. When someone online says, "My dad's out of town", the natural assumption for anyone to make is that the guy is probably married, and from the wording, it sounds implicitly like someone is still at the house. If I was a burglar, I wouldn't take the chance. There is a way to change your screen name on Live Journal, and it'll change it for all your LJ buddies as well. You have to pay money to do that, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 I switched to amethystmusings. I used that journal for a while the first time my stepmom found my other one. Now it's going to be my permanent home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ nivek ♦ Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 Ame... Use the Farse and punch the Big Red FOAD button... Woman has z e r o business telling an adult what to think/do/act/write when that said adult does no harm. kL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 11, 2006 Author Share Posted January 11, 2006 Unfortunately, Kevin, you can't do that in Live Journal. There's no banning by IP there. So I'm stuck with having to move. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
white_raven23 Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 You can't just ignore your stepmom? Moving your Livejournal sounds like a major task. If she's got the kind of personality where she will rant at your or dictate the content of every entry, then she's got the kind of personality that will simply move on to the next "thing about your life that bugs her" after you move the journal. Simply put, if it's not going to be about the journal, then it will be about something else. And if by moving the journal, you give her the "impression" that you minded her and quit the journal....she's getting a very wrong message about how her interference is perceived by you. She will think you are open to her influence (which you aren't), and she'll feel free to nitpick other areas of your life too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 I can't ban her by IP. Live Journal doesn't have that feature. Moving my live journal isn't that hard. I already had one started up. I'm not moving the actual posts from my old one or anything. I'm just deleting the old posts from my other one that were not friends-only. I need a place where I can be myself and talk to my friends. My last message on the journal is very clear. I'm not quitting live journal, I'm just changing to a different username, but I'm not telling her where I'm moving it to. The post where I put that info was friends-only. It was either create a new journal, or make all my posts friends-only, which wouldn't gain me any new readers. I honestly think this will be better, since she will just have to wonder what I am writing about her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 Also, last night I told her I might move it or make it all friends-only so she couldn't read any of it. She was like "oh, no, don't do that." I think she's afraid that she'll never be able to find it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
white_raven23 Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 When I asked about ignoring her......I didn't mean putting her on "ignore" via computer. I meant old fashioned ignore. If she's going to rant at you like you are a teenager....ACT like one. Ignore her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 Ah. Well, she apologized tonight. But I'm still switching over. It's the second time this has happened, and I don't want to have to walk on eggshells in my own LJ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpooky Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 So I've finally found your precious Stepmother, Amethyst. I demand that you transfer 50,000$ to the indicated secret Swiss bank account or mommy dearest gets the taser here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godless Dave Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 My options are: 1. Move the live journal to another user name, which I'm reluctant to do because I've got several months paid left on my old journal. But I'm willing to give up the paid time if I have to. 2. Make everything friends only, which I'm reluctant to do because I want to gain readers, not lose them. 3. Make my personal posts friends only, the problem of which is that after several months of my stepmom not saying anything, I end up letting it slide. Then she inevitably finds my journal again and I have to clamp down again. 4. Stop posting online, which I'm not willing to do because it's how I keep up with my friends. The first option would probably be my best bet, I think. That way, I don't have to worry about her finding it. Any other suggestions? You left off option 5: 5. Ignore the bitch and just keep posting on the same journal as you've been doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueGiant Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 I have to agree with the above. "Fuck you, this is my domain." seems to be a perfectly accptable response to this. There is no way she can dictate that. Yeah, she sounds seriosuly paranoid (and maybe a bit narcisicistic), perhaps some therapy for her is in order? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 Yeah, she sounds seriosuly paranoid (and maybe a bit narcisicistic), perhaps some therapy for her is in order? She only acts like that when my dad is overseas for work for a long time. However, my dad still has a few years before retirement, during which he will almost certainly be travelling again, and I don't want to have to put up with that for the rest of the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts