FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 How do you deal with your fear of death? It helps to want to die. Voice, are you ok? If you want to talk about it, we understand. Some of us have been there. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 How do I deal with my fear? I choose to live. I live now, because NOW is all we are guaranteed. There is no guarantee that we will have 80 years, 80 hours, or hell, even 80 seconds. Do what makes you happy, do what makes you happy and productive. That's how I do it. True that. I heard some guru say: "if you're troubled with questions about your existence, you're not living hard enough." And that's true. When you're longboarding down a mountainroad at 30 mph, you're not thinking philosophical thoughts, you're not even busy staying alive. You're living. When I'm ogling babes wearing shorts in my neighborhood...I'm livin. :-) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 How do I deal with my fear? I choose to live. I live now, because NOW is all we are guaranteed. There is no guarantee that we will have 80 years, 80 hours, or hell, even 80 seconds. Do what makes you happy, do what makes you happy and productive. That's how I do it. True that. I heard some guru say: "if you're troubled with questions about your existence, you're not living hard enough." And that's true. When you're longboarding down a mountainroad at 30 mph, you're not thinking philosophical thoughts, you're not even busy staying alive. You're living. When I'm ogling babes wearing shorts in my neighborhood...I'm livin. :-) You would be in nirvana then if you could sit in a sidewalk cafe on nevskii prospect here in spb in the summer. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubtingNate Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 It's also the frustration of things we will never know, like stopping in the middle of a book or movie. Will the world get better or worse? Will we achieve world peace or interstellar space travel? Will there even be a human race much longer? Will my son live a long, full life and will he be taken care of in his old age? We don't get to look down from heaven to see these things play out. That is an uncomfortable notion for me. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Voice Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 How do you deal with your fear of death? It helps to want to die. Voice, are you ok? If you want to talk about it, we understand. Some of us have been there. Is it so bad to want to die? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted July 3, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted July 3, 2014 How do I deal with my fear? I choose to live. I live now, because NOW is all we are guaranteed. There is no guarantee that we will have 80 years, 80 hours, or hell, even 80 seconds. Do what makes you happy, do what makes you happy and productive. That's how I do it. True that. I heard some guru say: "if you're troubled with questions about your existence, you're not living hard enough." And that's true. When you're longboarding down a mountainroad at 30 mph, you're not thinking philosophical thoughts, you're not even busy staying alive. You're living. When I'm ogling babes wearing shorts in my neighborhood...I'm livin. :-) You would be in nirvana then if you could sit in a sidewalk cafe on nevskii prospect here in spb in the summer. Fuck heaven, when I die I want to go to Odessa in summer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chikirin Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 The good thing about dying is no longer having to deal with bills, crime, traffic, pop music, reality tv, etc. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RogueScholar Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Hello friends! So, almost everybody I know has an incredible fear of death. Death, and the basic idea that everything and everyone we know and love is going to die and decay is one of those fears/problems that is so indisputably unsolvable, that our minds just decide to bury it in some sort of psychological limbo. People I know don't like to talk about death. As for me, I love talking about death. Maybe the taboo is what makes it so interesting in the first place. For example: most of the males on my father's side of the family died in traffic accidents halfway through their fourties. I always like to jokingly say that I have every right to have a midlife crisis during my twenties. After all, statistics show that I'm halfway there already. Most people seem to hate that kind of dark humor when it comes to the grim reaper. Here is my question: what happened to your fear of death after you left the church? I mean, christianity has a very clear perspective on life after death, so what happened after the safety of that certainty fell away? How do you deal with your fear of death? I've always avoided really thinking about death. I've been around a significant amount of death, dying and suffering, but I was so disconnected about it. It was always something that happened to somebody else. Following my deconversion, I've had to confront death and the fact that I will die and that I suffer and could suffer even more, I'm that somebody else. Unfortunately, I have little comfort or insight to offer. I have a significant fear of death and I'm exceptionally confused about what kind of philosophy to develop regarding this issue. As evidenced by my signature, it's not a lack of trying, but rather decades of never really confronting this important concept. I guess I'm paying the price for having my head in the sand for so long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted July 3, 2014 Moderator Share Posted July 3, 2014 I have a fear of how I will die. If I make it to a certain age without getting squished like a bug and I end up getting really sick, I also, like amateur mentioned, have a 'Death by Design' plan. I will not go through what I have been watching in the hospital over the past few weeks nor do I ever want to live to be 93 like my dear old MIL who just sits day after day waiting to die now. I suppose if one can dance until that are 100 years old, that might be a different story. I can also see how people get tired of the struggle to live and survive and want to die. I don't want to die right now..i'd like to live awhile longer and I will make the best of it, but I'm no longer scared to be dead. It has already been mentioned here that we would like to see the rest of 'the story' and what might be in another 200 years. That is the biggest thing that pisses me off because I love to watch and observe the world and how this human story is going to take shape. I'm just nosy, that's all....Lol Hug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 "I'm not so much afraid of dying as I am of people not taking me seriously when I get there." amateur I'm with you, amateur. Both relatives and health care providers are, from my observation, phony with the dying too often. Has it ever occurred to them that he/she might want to die? I'm serious. If one has gotten to an age in which she can't enjoy life and, even if she could survive, it would be a mere dull maintenance of life, why wouldn't she want to die? If one is a point where she can't even feel or express the love she has always had for her husband and children, etc. because she feels so bad, the main reason for living has passed. As my mother-in-law said when she was in a slow process of dying,"enough is enough". bill I have definitely seen that when people are near the end, they often are ready for death. That's one reason I'm not afraid of it. Like Margee, I don't want to die right now because I am definitely still nosy about what will happen! But when I worked with those elderly people, and both my mom and dad, they were READY for death and sometimes stated that very very clearly. They no longer were nosy because they were DONE. If I'm old and bedridden, or have a terminal disease like my parents, I think that's a perfectly acceptable and normal attitude, and SHOULD be respected and acknowledged by those around them (family and nurses). In the meantime, it's summer here and I live near a small beach and I totally am enjoying the living and the hot guys with their tans! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted July 5, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted July 5, 2014 http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/60610-why-i-embrace-death/#.U7fFifldVJQ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 I fear I may die right before I hit "submit" for a rather lengthy, well thought out, eloquent post on Ex-c. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 I shall materially re-incarnate. If my atoms are buried then as I push up daisies, animals will eat them, then people will eat those animals and I will become part of many humans again. What I am now was once the cells of many other humans, perhaps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Androo Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 That kind of thinking gives me some peace, midniterider. Thanks :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 "I'm not so much afraid of dying as I am of people not taking me seriously when I get there." amateur I'm with you, amateur. Both relatives and health care providers are, from my observation, phony with the dying too often. Has it ever occurred to them that he/she might want to die? I'm serious. If one has gotten to an age in which she can't enjoy life and, even if she could survive, it would be a mere dull maintenance of life, why wouldn't she want to die? If one is a point where she can't even feel or express the love she has always had for her husband and children, etc. because she feels so bad, the main reason for living has passed. As my mother-in-law said when she was in a slow process of dying,"enough is enough". bill I have definitely seen that when people are near the end, they often are ready for death. That's one reason I'm not afraid of it. Like Margee, I don't want to die right now because I am definitely still nosy about what will happen! But when I worked with those elderly people, and both my mom and dad, they were READY for death and sometimes stated that very very clearly. They no longer were nosy because they were DONE. If I'm old and bedridden, or have a terminal disease like my parents, I think that's a perfectly acceptable and normal attitude, and SHOULD be respected and acknowledged by those around them (family and nurses). In the meantime, it's summer here and I live near a small beach and I totally am enjoying the living and the hot guys with their tans! funny thing is, I'm an atheist and I've been near death. In fact, when I was admitted to the hospital a few weeks ago, the docs told me I was about a week away had I not started dialysis when I did. I any case, death does't bother me in the least any more. Meanwhile, my Christian grandfather hung on to life for all it was worth, putting himself through a lot of pain near the end, just so he wouldn't have to go meet his maker. My uncle died of bone cancer and fought death all the way to the end when died a horrifically painful death. I know for a fact, in the same situation, I'd feel no guilt or hesitation about taking the quick way out. You'd think those who spent a lifetime preaching about heaven would feel the same, but in my experience, they fight it the hardest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scottsman Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 How do you deal with your fear of death? It helps to want to die. Voice, are you ok? If you want to talk about it, we understand. Some of us have been there. Is it so bad to want to die? This/\ I don't want to exist forever. There must be an end. Live life to the fullest, then die. It will happen. Might as well have a plan. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seven77 Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 I don't fear death. I view it as the end of life. That's all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted July 8, 2014 Moderator Share Posted July 8, 2014 I might have some apprehension about the "unknown." But I'm more angry than afraid. I'm angry about my life-time wasted with xianity. I want my time (years, decades) back. But they aren't coming back, so I have to live life as fully as I can from now on. This is exactly how I feel also Human. I would do everything soooo different now. It's never too late. I'm goin' to live it up for as long as i can now....with no guilt...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted July 8, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted July 8, 2014 I might have some apprehension about the "unknown." But I'm more angry than afraid. I'm angry about my life-time wasted with xianity. I want my time (years, decades) back. But they aren't coming back, so I have to live life as fully as I can from now on. This is exactly how I feel also Human. I would do everything soooo different now. It's never too late. I'm goin' to live it up for as long as i can now....with no guilt...... If I was god, I'd come to each person as they lay dying and say, "I've counted up all the time you wasted in your life, between TV, bad relationships, religion, etc. and I've come to the sum total of 22 years, seven months, 13 days, 10 hours, 42 minutes, and 18 seconds. Just for good measure, I'm going to round up and give you 23 years more time in this life. DON"T waste it." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Androo Posted July 10, 2014 Share Posted July 10, 2014 I'm realizing lately that I don't fear death as much as I just fear the unknown in general. Still trying to find a way to deal with it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ContraBardus Posted July 10, 2014 Share Posted July 10, 2014 I've been dead twice. I spent several months in the hospital and eventually had heart surgery. During that time I died and was revived twice. It was unimpressive. Nothing of note, no magical tunnels, seeing my life, relatives, any sort of spiritual out of body anything. It was like taking a dreamless nap and waking up. Having tried it a couple of times, there is no longer anything scary about death. I'm not looking forward to it or anything, but it's not a worry or concern of mine. Once it happens, I won't notice being dead at all. I've heard about NDE and OOBE, but as near as I can tell from my own personal experience it's BS and misunderstood. I don't see it as anything more than the brain's startups screen after being reset. You've got to be alive and have brain function for it to happen and it occurs in that space between being dead and being revived while the brain boots up after being shut down from certain types of trauma or injury. Nothing more. "Heaven is for Real" is complete horse shit and a genius cash grab from the faithful. Complete fiction meant to jerk off the blind faith of the masses. Death is unimpressive and really rather boring. Dying might be interesting, but death itself is incredibly dull. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deva Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 It is difficult to really think about. I sometimes wonder what it would be like to get a diagnosis of something fatal - I don't know how I would react. Actually knowing what in all likelihood will kill you in two or three years. I suppose I dread that more than death itself, knowing how I worry about stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 I used to fear death because of eternal damnation, but I no longer believe that mess. I do not fear death, I believe death is just a gentle passing to a different existence. Death is like an exit, a door that you open to enter another room, a peaceful change. I do believe that we continue on after death and that death is not a bad thing, it only brings pain to the people who have lost their beloved to it. I do fear the dying process, the thought of the pain, ouch! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted July 16, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted July 16, 2014 http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/60610-why-i-embrace-death/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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