xtify Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 Or does it? It appears certain christians are now back-pedalling from this claim. As in this recent Christianity Today article: http://www.christianitytoday.com/women/2014/july/good-sex-comes-to-those-who-wait.html?paging=off ...As Christians longing for the next life, we must recognize that even sex is not fully what God intended. Promising amazing sex in exchange for purity doesn't serve anyone. In fact, it can do a greater disservice to the one yet to be married, or in a pleasure-less marriage. At the end of the day, sex is not about us and our needs being met. It is about humble service of another—our spouse. We must resist the world's model of sex as a means of personal fulfillment. Promising great sex to those who wait for their wedding day is feeding off of our desire for self-fulfillment, not other-oriented service. Of course, we were made to enjoy God's gifts, but the gifts were never meant to be all about us... Two virgins have the best sex... rrright 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 At the end of the day, sex is not about us and our needs being met. It is about humble service of another—our spouse. Actually, Christianity Today, sex is about us and our needs being met, which can often involve focusing on the other person/people's needs being met too, but it need not. I hate the way xians fuck with people's understanding of sexuality. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnonymousCoward Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 I was taught that my future wife would much prefer that I'd only ever been with her rather than the first few times to being good due to experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 No, good sex comes to those who are ready. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubtingNate Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 the reason they think it is so good is because they haven't had it anywhere else. I guess that can be a mixed blessing, to not know what you're missing. Or it could actually be that good. It's a big gamble. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Christians sadly think that "God" invented marriage. That it is a religious tenet. It's not. It was designed by pagans thousands of years ago and it had nothing to do with religion or a god. So, to say that one should wait until their wedding day for sex tohappen, again...is just another falsehood being promoted by Christians. Christians by and large have SO many hang ups and insecurities when it comes to sexuality and the expression of it. It's always illustrated as a prize to be won or a dirty invention of man. That the act of sex is somehow immoral if you aren't "married." The divorce rate is pretty high amongst Christians so something's not working. lol Atheists make better lovers. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthmama514 Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Yes because i really only desire to have sex to make my partner happier and serve them. that doesnt take the fun out of it at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Yes because i really only desire to have sex to make my partner happier and serve them. that doesnt take the fun out of it at all. Lol! I like giving but receiving is quite fun. Also..."serving" someone through sex? Give me a break. Christianity makes sex out to be a service to be rendered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthmama514 Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 [quote name="Deidre32" post="971361" timestamp="1405689747" Also..."serving" someone through sex? Give me a break. Christianity makes sex out to be a service to be rendered. Then they really should have no problem with prostitution then huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xtify Posted July 18, 2014 Author Share Posted July 18, 2014 I agree with everyone's opinions above. This article is reducing sex to just another household chore. I remember being a fundy wife helpmeet idiot, and I remember thinking it was my duty to cross that chore off the list in an effort to serve my owner, I mean husband, lol. This quote from the article really irritates me: Indeed, sex is perhaps the most powerful God-created way to help you give your entire self to another human being. Sex is God's appointed way for two people to reciprocally say to one another "I belong completely, permanently, and exclusively to you." You must not use sex to say anything less. So the message again is to stop trying to make sex about pleasure. It has nothing to do with the pleasure you hear about, even if you wait for the "right" one. It's really about human ownership, possession and servitude (aka, slavery). Get over it purity pledgers! Your chastity vows were just about being controlled. There is no prize. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 If/when my wife just does it out of a sense of duty, that sucks the fun out of it! Or rather it doesn't...? Either way... Sex is definitely most enjoyable when both parties want each other. Just like other aspects of a relationship, if your heart's not in it, then it's empty. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xtify Posted July 18, 2014 Author Share Posted July 18, 2014 If/when my wife just does it out of a sense of duty, that sucks the fun out of it! Or rather it doesn't...? Either way... Sex is definitely most enjoyable when both parties want each other. Just like other aspects of a relationship, if your heart's not in it, then it's empty. I agree. It sucks for both the men and women in church ordained marriages when sex is performed as a duty. That's probably why the church promotes it like that. They want humans miserable. It's better for the collections. The more emptiness people feel, the more likely they are to seek out "spiritual" fulfillment. What gets me is that after lying to an entire cohort of purity culture kids about how virginity pays off in incredible, mindblowing sex, they are now suggesting that it's selfish to have expected it would. And no one is calling bullshit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 If/when my wife just does it out of a sense of duty, that sucks the fun out of it! Or rather it doesn't...? Either way... Sex is definitely most enjoyable when both parties want each other. Just like other aspects of a relationship, if your heart's not in it, then it's empty. I agree. It sucks for both the men and women in church ordained marriages when sex is performed as a duty. That's probably why the church promotes it like that. They want humans miserable. It's better for the collections. The more emptiness people feel, the more likely they are to seek out "spiritual" fulfillment. What gets me is that after lying to an entire cohort of purity culture kids about how virginity pays off in incredible, mindblowing sex, they are now suggesting that it's selfish to have expected it would. And no one is calling bullshit? I agree. It sets people up for disappoinent. They aren't taught that great sex takes experience. I have friends who are married. They both saved themselves for marriage. She told my wife and I that when they had sex for the first time she said, "That was it?!?!" Haha. They've been married several years now and seem to be doing great, but that just goes to show you the false expectations the church gives. Now, apparently, they are realizing that such teaching was a bad idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wyson Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 Lol, that article makes me speechless. Its like its been written by a 13 year old girl who heard something about sex, from someone who heard something about sex from their Sunday school teacher. Its pretty clear she hasnt had a casual hookup in her life! Either that or she is a hypocrite / in deep denial. Anyone of either sex who has rightly indulged their animal passions with consenting partners knows casual hookups can be great fun. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 This reminds me of something you would hear out of the mouths of the Duggar girls. They have no more clue than a chimpanzee does at working calculus.true. and sad. something tells me 'mr duggar' sucks in bed. just because you have 1000 kids, doesn't mean you're any good. lol i think he is way weird. and seriously...probably boring as fuck. i feel sorry for 'mrs duggar' who's had to lay there all those years counting ceiling tiles, but hey...she has a hit show now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 10 kids=10 sexual interactions @ 6 seconds a time = a minute of "pleasure" resulting in 200 hours of painful labour. Christian women have it real good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Good Sex Comes To Those Who Wait so true.... some of the best times I have ever had, was when I waited patiently to come during cowgirl position, so I could feel and watch my wife writhing in ectasy while having an orgasm for like 2 minutes straight! Waiting for that leads to REALLY GOOD SEX! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StruggleWithin Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Sooo, let me get this straight, I am supposed to get my sexual advice from people that have had one sexual partner, or not had sex at all (so they claim)?? Hmm...sounds like getting parenting advice from people who have no children. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 ^^If I want advice on how to molest children I will ask the church, they are experts in that field Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Good Sex Comes To Those Who Wait so true.... some of the best times I have ever had, was when I waited patiently to come during cowgirl position, so I could feel and watch my wife writhing in ectasy while having an orgasm for like 2 minutes straight! Waiting for that leads to REALLY GOOD SEX! can i vote this the 'best answer' of the thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Good Sex Comes To Those Who Wait so true.... some of the best times I have ever had, was when I waited patiently to come during cowgirl position, so I could feel and watch my wife writhing in ectasy while having an orgasm for like 2 minutes straight! Waiting for that leads to REALLY GOOD SEX! can i vote this the 'best answer' of the thread? +1 and I've run out of upvotes for the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bfuddled Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Wait...... 2 minute long orgasms? I must be doing something wrong here... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Wait...... 2 minute long orgasms? I must be doing something wrong here... Um, it might not be you who is doing something wrong 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 Wait...... 2 minute long orgasms? I must be doing something wrong here... Ok, so 2 minutes is probably a slight exaggeration. But yes, I am gifted in the sack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoubtingNate Posted July 19, 2014 Share Posted July 19, 2014 This reminds me of something you would hear out of the mouths of the Duggar girls. They have no more clue than a chimpanzee does at working calculus.true. and sad. something tells me 'mr duggar' sucks in bed. just because you have 1000 kids, doesn't mean you're any good. lol i think he is way weird. and seriously...probably boring as fuck. i feel sorry for 'mrs duggar' who's had to lay there all those years counting ceiling tiles, but hey...she has a hit show now. Yeah, and how big is her pussy anyway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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