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Goodbye Jesus

Sunday Sasquatch


TheRedneckProfessor

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The photograph below was taken in context and I believe that Big Foot exists.  It doesn't matter if science can prove it or not.  It doesn't matter if it is logical or not.  It doesn't even matter that I am on an Ex-BigFootBelievers website.  Sasquatch is real and that is all I care about.

sas.jpg

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I've never seen such compelling evidence!

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Wow! And he even posed behind that big red circle that was out in the woods.

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1/3 Americans believe in Big Foot.

 

http://blog.chron.com/sciguy/2012/09/one-third-of-americans-believe-in-bigfoot/

 

Also here are some Bob Dylan lyrics:

 

"I am a man of constant sorrow

I've seen trouble all my days

I'll say good-bye to Colorado

Where I was born and partly raised."

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There could be a Bigfoot existing somewhere. New animals and plants are discovered frequently. However, with all the concerted effort that has been put forth over the past few decades one would expect some real evidence by now. No hair samples with unidentified DNA, no scat, no bones, no decent photos. Still, the possibility of Bigfoot remains greater than the possibility of YHWH.

 

Shhhh.....sounds like a 'Squatch coming.......

 

Later!

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Several different cultures have Sasquatch stories, so it must be true. Where there's smoke there's fire. </sarcasm>

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I will take Sasquatch on faith until science can prove Sasquatch isn't real.

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Bobs-Burgers-Season-Finale-2012-Beefsqua

 

Proof of Beefsquatch, Sasquatch's divinely ordained prophesied 21st century messiah. Note the prayer stance from an obedient believer in the foreground and the expression of believing bliss from the girl in the pink hat. All praise the awesome Beefsquatch! 

 

Also, note the lyrics to this wondrous song proclaiming the NOT-magical and TOTALLY miraculous powers of our holy Father Sasquatch:

 

"Down where the sasquatch hide,
In the misty mountainside,
He's got shiny diamonds that he's got to protect,
Look into the sasquatch eye,
Did you know that sass could fly?
Sasquatch is my daddy and he's going to protect, me!
Half man, half machine,
On the cover of a magazine,
Bigfoot is my father and he's got to protect, me!
These lyrics don't make sense,
Think i've found the evidence,
That yeti is my papa and he wants to protect, me!"

 

~Lyrics to "Sasquatch" by Tenacious D

 

There you have it folks. Sasquatch is indeed my daddy, my one-of-a-kind Sky-daddy. Offering love and protection to all! He can fly! These lyrics don't make sense because I have found the evidence. It says so right there. Don't ya know, READING IS FUN. Wendycrazy.gif

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I have personally cast out many yeti in Beefsquatch's name through the power of the almighty Sasquatch.  My unverified claim about my own personal experience should be enough to convince any remaining doubters.

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There could be a Bigfoot existing somewhere. New animals and plants are discovered frequently. However, with all the concerted effort that has been put forth over the past few decades one would expect some real evidence by now. No hair samples with unidentified DNA, no scat, no bones, no decent photos. Still, the possibility of Bigfoot remains greater than the possibility of YHWH.

 

Shhhh.....sounds like a 'Squatch coming.......

 

Later!

 

No scat, no bones, no motorcars...not a single luxury....oh wait...sorry...nvm.

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I will take Sasquatch on faith until science can prove Sasquatch isn't real.

 

As for me and my house, we serve the Squatch. :-)

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You fucking heathens!  I can't believe you would fall for such a cheap deception of the devil!

 

KNEEL BEFORE THE ONE TRUE GOD!  I SAID KNEEL!

 

flying_spaghetti_monster_icon_by_testing

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Where's your god now, Roz?

sasquatch.jpg

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You took that picture out of context!

 

You didn't show how after he ate the pasta, it gave him food poisoning, so the pasta won in the end!  

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You took that picture out of context!

 

You didn't show how after he ate the pasta, it gave him food poisoning, so the pasta won in the end!  

LIAR!  That myth was added later by priests in an effort to convert heathens over to Pastafarianism.

 

The meal ended peacefully and here's evidence to prove it:

last.jpg

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I hate to be that fire and brimstone preacher, but you leave me no choice:

 

the-flying-spaghetti-monster.jpg

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1377322375-0.jpg

 

BEHOLD! It is written in the book of the LARD, in the Gospel of Cheesus: "And the Virgin Olive Oil shall conceive a child that resteth upon beds of noodle, as given by the father and shall be made of beef, as blessed by the mother and the two shall bring together all that is glorious in the Pantry! Go forth and spread the awesome news!"

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Let me know when the next "Flying Spaghetti Monster" Festival starts.

 

http://www.sasquatchfestival.com/

 

We KNOW Big Foot is real; and we celebrate his name.

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You were never a True BelieverTM.

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You were never a True BelieverTM.

 

I'm glad I wasn't ever one.

 

large.jpg

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Thur. Dispatch #666

 

I used to not beLIEve in Sasquatch, but now I do. That makes me an extremely intelligent authority on the subject of Sasquatch. - B.S. Lewiss

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Also, note the lyrics to this wondrous song proclaiming the NOT-magical and TOTALLY miraculous powers of our holy Father Sasquatch:

 

"Down where the sasquatch hide,

In the misty mountainside,

He's got shiny diamonds that he's got to protect,

Look into the sasquatch eye,

Did you know that sass could fly?

Sasquatch is my daddy and he's going to protect, me!

Half man, half machine,

On the cover of a magazine,

Bigfoot is my father and he's got to protect, me!

These lyrics don't make sense,

Think i've found the evidence,

That yeti is my papa and he wants to protect, me!"

 

~Lyrics to

 

There you have it folks. Sasquatch is indeed my daddy, my one-of-a-kind Sky-daddy. Offering love and protection to all! He can fly! These lyrics don't make sense because I have found the evidence. It says so right there. Don't ya know, READING IS FUN. :crazy:

YES! Don't you know that Father Sasquatch decrees that you must be baptized in the flowing waters of the strawberry river? All praise the mighty Squatch.

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YES! Don't you know that Father Sasquatch decrees that you must be baptized in the flowing waters of the strawberry river? All praise the mighty Squatch.

 

 

 

I'm taking a collection to help my Sasquatch ministry . . . 

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Hey, I just made a grilled cheese sandwich and the image of Sasquatch appeared on it!

 

PRAISE THE BIGFOOT!

 

( I'd post photographic proof, but I was hungry and I ate it. You'll just have to have faith in me.)

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