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Sunday Dispatula


FreeThinkerNZ
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Some spatulas are literal and some metaphorical, and I can discern which is which when the Holy Spatula guides me.

 

 

284317115.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

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I have 3 spatulas in My kitchen.  Does that make Me a Polyspatulatarian, or is it actually a trinitarian Spatulahead in 3 utensils? 

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I have 3 spatulas in My kitchen.  Does that make Me a Polyspatulatarian, or is it actually a trinitarian Spatulahead in 3 utensils? 

I have four metal spatulas and two that are made of plastic.  That makes me spatula-ier than thou.

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Wait, that first picture shows one of those really narrow spatulas, and that's what my wife calls a spatula. But my mom uses one of the wider things and calls it a spatula--but my wife says that's a 'turner.'

 

Help--I'm caught in the middle of a denomination war!

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Bullshit I have the one true spatula! Purify the infidels! *smacks Pratt with the Almighty Spatulord* feel the sting of the purifying Swedish steel you aluminum heathen!

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mine is the only true silicon spatula, and if you cannot accept it, i make sure you be the ultimate sacrifice,,,,,, shovel it up where the sun don't shine for 3 days and 3 nights

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Behold! I present the one True™  spatula:

 

Bacon-Spatula-Turner_44037-l.jpg

 

"The fear of the SPATULA is the beginning of wisdom; all those who practice their flipping techniques have a good understanding. The SPATULA rarely endures forever, due to poor care and misuse!" -- Prosciuttos, 111:10, Pork Standard Version Baconble yelrotflmao.gif

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Dispatch from Michigan...I bought a Spatula at a dollar store. Guess what it cost me?

 

One dollar and 6 cents.

 

There should be a separation of Spatula and state. I am outraged and offended.

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Our spatula which art in our kitchen

hallowed be thy name.

Thy cooking be accomplished

as it should be done

In the kitchen as at the campsite.

Give us this day our pancakes, fried eggs

and hamburgers

and forgive us our use of forks and other utensils.

For thine is the glory in the kitchen

and every where else

forever and ever,

Amen.

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When IT rolls up ITS sleeves

IT ain't just puttin' on the Ritz

(our SPATULA is an Awesome SPATULA)

There is thunder in ITS flips

And lightning in ITS SIZZLIN' FITS

(our SPATULA is an Awesome SPATULA)

Well the SPATULA wasn't jokin'

when IT KEPT 'em from eatin'

It wasn't for no reason that IT shed ITS TEFLON COATING

ITS return is very close and so you better be believin'

That our SPATULA is an Awesome SPATULA

 

Our SPATULA (our SPATULA) is an Awesome SPATULA

IT Reigns (IT reigns) from THE HOOK above

With Chocolate chips (with chocolate chips) pow'r and love

Our SPATULA is an Awesome SPATULA

 

When the griddle was pancake-less in the void of the night

(our SPATULA is an awesome SPATULA)

IT spoke into the darkness and created the cakes so light

(our SPATULA is an awesome SPATULA)

Judgement and wrath IT poured out on the knife

Mercy and grace IT gave us at the last BREAKFAST

I hope that we have not too quickly forgotten that

Our SPATULA is an Awesome SPATULA!

 

-sung to the tune of "Awesome God" by Rich Mullins or Michael W. Smith or any number of other persons.

 

Let us not forget our awesome spatula and just how great it is. Spatula bless you all. :D

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