AgnosticBob AtheistPants Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 I'd like to know everyone's favorite Christian analogies to what "God is like." Generally speaking, I mean the analogies they like to use to compare God to something testable and real in this world in an attempt to show you why you should believe in him. Mine is "God is like the air we breathe! You can't see it, you can't touch it, you can't hold it in your hand, but if it wasn't there, we couldn't live!" Of course there is no thought as to the fact that the air is testable and can be proven to exist. God is not just "invisible", he isn't present in any form or fashion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dianka Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 God is like a taco salad. Wait. No he's not. Can I start over?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flyby Stardancer Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 LOL! When I first saw the title to this thread, I thought: "god is like...africanized bees." Then something hit me: that's an insult to the bees! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 The Xian god is like pouring nail polish remover on my testicles. Neither one of them was a good idea at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlinfmct87 Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 "God is there to explain everything I don't know." I kid you not. Genuine quote. Merlin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thunderbolt Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 God is like Freddy Mercury from Queen The Great Pretender! Oh yes I’m the great pretender (ooh ooh) Pretending I’m doing well (ooh ooh) My need is such I pretend too much I’m lonely but no one can tell Oh yes I’m the great pretender (ooh ooh) Adrift in a world of my own (ooh ooh) I play the game but to my real shame You’ve left me to dream all alone Too real is this feeling of make believe ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Antlerman Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Of course there is no thought as to the fact that the air is testable and can be proven to exist. God is not just "invisible", he isn't present in any form or fashion. That's funny. Next time tell that God is really much more like the sound of one hand clapping. That'll give them something to ponder that'll stretch their thinking a little. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skankboy Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 My least favorite would be "God is Love!" All I can think of is "well, try not getting any on me ok?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaded Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 God is like a trip to the dentist. Your expectations are high, but it never ends well and costs you a fortune. I always used to hear the "god is love" analogy too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fweethawt Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 For us - God is like a good fart. He's painful as hell when you keep him in, but OH what a relief when you let him go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 For us - God is like a good fart. He's painful as hell when you keep him in, but OH what a relief when you let him go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ex-COG Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 The Xian god is like pouring nail polish remover on my testicles. Dude...you didn't? What were you on? As to the original question...I've heard of God being compared to an egg. Just as an egg consists of three parts, the shell, the white, and the yolk; God consists of three parts, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Reminds me of that anti-drug commercial where they fry an egg, saying "This is your brain on drugs". Fry up God-egg in a skillet and say "This is God? Where is your brain?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilith Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 That's funny. Next time tell that God is really much more like the sound of one hand clapping. That'll give them something to ponder that'll stretch their thinking a little. The only problem with that is they'll look at you with a, "Oh yes, you do get it!" look on their faces and say, "Exactly!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angel Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 For us - God is like a good fart. He's painful as hell when you keep him in, but OH what a relief when you let him go! LOLOLOLOL That is a good one!!! Other than the "God is love" another one that I heard a lot was "God is awesome" Ex-COG, I have also heard of the egg thing, with the father, son and holy ghost.... it also brought to my husband's mind that old commercial. He mentioned that very thing the other day.. lol Just where the christians want you.... your brains scrambled. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I Broke Free Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 God is like a ‘gift’ box of Cracker Jack Your parents give it to you willingly It’s a bit hard to open at first It seems nice going down But soon you are troubled It’s stuck between your teeth and in your gums! You end up with dentures And a really shitty prize Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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