Portobella Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 I'm usually pretty resilient, but every now and then, my parents manage to really rattle me. They called me this weekend to declare they were too busy preaching to remember my birthday a few weeks ago, and of course, to tell me I have been deceived by the world. “You might think you’re an atheist, but you will never really be atheist no matter how hard you try because you know deep down that Jesus is Lord. You are named Fate, and you were named by God. It is therefore your purpose to live for him, and you must accept this, as you cannot escape your God-given identity. So just give up – don’t try to think or use reason – just return to the Lord, for it is your destiny.” What bullshit. Now I know beyond any doubt that they are unthinking, mindless drones who surrendered all critical thinking abilities for a shot at eternal life. Time for me to move on, I think.
Wittyusername Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Christians use that verse 'Come let us reason together ' to show that God wants to reason with us. But as we both know you HAVE TO switch off critical thinking, the common sense you were born with and just suspend disbelief like when you watch a Disney movie. Anything else is 'giving the devil a foothold '. If you do reason and think you generally end up here on ex-Christian.net...
♦ ficino ♦ Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Portobella, what a horrible story. It sounds as though your parents are just awful. Hugs, f
dangitbobby83 Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 That's terrible. The funny thing - that line almost sounds like it could be in a fantasy movie or novel. It would be appropriate in a FANTASY novel, taking place in a FANTASY land. But this is reality. I remember one reason I was a Christian was to cope with the evil that was around us everyday. The idea of cosmic justice, heaven, and someone much larger in control made life...easier? But it was intellectual laziness. I imagine your parents (and most other christians) suffer from this too.
dangitbobby83 Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 “You might think you’re an atheist, but you will never really be atheist no matter how hard you try because you know deep down that Jesus is Lord.” I always hate this reasoning. "You can't be an atheist because deep down you have a God sized hole in your heart...you know that Jesus is real...blah blah" It's utter bullshit. This idea that we all "know god exists" but are just angry or in denial - I know many atheists who are fully functioning human beings with both failures and successes and who get by without even thinking about God. This "hole in the heart" theory has always been bullshit. Even when I was a Christian, it was something that puzzled me, considering that I was perfectly happy before I thought I needed Jesus.
ToHellWithMe Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 If it really were your fate, you could resist all you want; you could reason all you want. And your parents, aware of your fate, could trust that in the end all will be right so they could just observe you with a smile and let you go and live as you please. But if they don't - if they coax, if they manipulate - chances are your fate depends on you believing in that fate and acting as if you already know what it entails. 2
mymistake Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Am I the only one who thinks it sounds like Darth Vader? "Come to the dark side. You cannot escape . . . it is your destiny!" Wow, creepy. Sorry to hear about your folks Portobella. 1
yunea Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Wtf! That whole comment. What talk! Moving on sounds good. I'm sorry to hear they treat you this way.
midniterider Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Next time you talk to your wacky parents say, "Hey, Mom I found this great church and I've been attending ..... JUST KIDDING!!!" hahaha 1
Guest Furball Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 I'm usually pretty resilient, but every now and then, my parents manage to really rattle me. They called me this weekend to declare they were too busy preaching to remember my birthday a few weeks ago, and of course, to tell me I have been deceived by the world. “You might think you’re an atheist, but you will never really be atheist no matter how hard you try because you know deep down that Jesus is Lord. You are named Fate, and you were named by God. It is therefore your purpose to live for him, and you must accept this, as you cannot escape your God-given identity. So just give up – don’t try to think or use reason – just return to the Lord, for it is your destiny.” What bullshit. Now I know beyond any doubt that they are unthinking, mindless drones who surrendered all critical thinking abilities for a shot at eternal life. Time for me to move on, I think. If it is your destiny to return to the lord, what do they care if you're an atheist or not, you're guaranteed to go home to be with the lord. Also, when dealing with people like this, the easiest way to shut them up is to prove them that the bible is fake by ripping it to shreds showing them the inconsistencies and contradictions. Ask them if god is so loving and merciful and is intimately involved with everyone's life, then why does he allow 100's of thousands of children to suffer and die horrible deaths everyday. Ask them where god's love is while a child screams in horrible agony from brain cancer. You're right, it is all bullshit, and nothing shows christianity to be nothing more than an insane death cult than it's followers and their insane ways of thinking. Sorry your going through this. You have friends and support on here. 2
amateur Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Wow, just wow. I'm sorry your parents have no respect for you, between ignoring your birthday because they're too "busy," and telling you what's really going on inside of you (like anybody else actually knows that). They sound kind of like antiparents.
Burny Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 TBH, most fundy xtians would share that sentiment, including most of my xtian family and friends. Remember - some of them REALLY BELIEVE that stuff, they really think that the devil is real and he has deceived us. They aren't trying to be aholes, they are exercising strict "love" to save us from a Hell that they think is REAL. That's the scary thing. But we don't have to put up with that crap either. They're free to slander us, we're free to ignore them back.
older Posted November 9, 2015 Posted November 9, 2015 Hugs to you, PB. Sorry it has come to this. You might remind them that for them to tell you that they are right and you are wrong is pride, which is the deadliest of the seven deadly sins. It is "the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins: the source of the others. It is identified as believing that one is essentially better than others, failing to acknowledge the accomplishments of others."* Pride is what caused Lucifer's transformation into Satan. Thus they have sinned and they need to repent and beg forgiveness else then end up in Hell. Then you might also tell them that discussions or even minor mentions of religion are off the table and if they want a continuing relationship with you they will have to honor this. Tell them that you do not want to hear about it in any way, shape, or form. Then be prepared to back up your stance. If they violate your rule, hang up, leave, or whatever is appropriate. * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_deadly_sins#Pride
Mythra Posted November 10, 2015 Posted November 10, 2015 If you decide to disown your parents, no worries. We'll adopt you. 1
Portobella Posted November 10, 2015 Author Posted November 10, 2015 Thanks everyone for the kind words of support. It's wonderful to hear different perspectives, and all your advice has been wonderful I always hate this reasoning. "You can't be an atheist because deep down you have a God sized hole in your heart...you know that Jesus is real...blah blah" Yep! There's no arguing with them about the god-sized hole... Also, when dealing with people like this, the easiest way to shut them up is to prove them that the bible is fake by ripping it to shreds showing them the inconsistencies and contradictions. My parents both hold doctorates ("doctorates") in christian theology, and can BS their way out of absolutely everything you throw at them. I'm afraid there is no convincing them on that front They aren't trying to be aholes, they are exercising strict "love" to save us from a Hell that they think is REAL. That's exactly it. It's the 'whoever spares the rod hates their child' angle, and they've always taken pride in choosing to discipline their children well into adulthood rather than befriend them. I know they have good intentions, and that's what keeps me from ignoring them altogether.
Lilith666 Posted November 10, 2015 Posted November 10, 2015 Sorry to hear that, Portobella. Belief messes up people's priorities.
FlowerDemon Posted November 10, 2015 Posted November 10, 2015 Tell them "Why were you too busy to be there for my birthday? Wouldn't the Lord want you to spend time with your daughter? Why did you let your business and your religion get in the way of being good parents?" I don't know, that's what I would say. We all feel for you Portobella...it sucks having Christian wacko fundamentalists as family members, especially when they're on your case about whether or not you believe. If it were me I would try to not talk about religious things around them since they sound very resistant and stubborn...they sound good at bsing their way through things. That's a tough situation, I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. 1
mymistake Posted November 10, 2015 Posted November 10, 2015 That's exactly it. It's the 'whoever spares the rod hates their child' angle, and they've always taken pride in choosing to discipline their children well into adulthood rather than befriend them. I know they have good intentions, and that's what keeps me from ignoring them altogether. Wow. Maybe you should cut your losses and keep them out of your life. If you decide to have kids don't let your parent have an influence Sorry but their behavior is over the top.
Daffodil Posted November 10, 2015 Posted November 10, 2015 Sounds like they're Calvinists. I never understood, even as a Christian, how that was supposed to work. There is no free will, either God calls you or he doesn't and you are "destined" (predestined) to accept or reject him. So if that is true, why bother telling anyone about Jesus? There's no need to proselytize if there is no free will and we are all predestined to accept or deny. He already knows which of us are going to be in heaven with him, so why should we care about others? It makes no sense at all. Sorry to hear about your parents. Wish I had words of wisdom, but I can only say I'm glad you're here and seeking good vibes from us.
rjn Posted November 11, 2015 Posted November 11, 2015 They aren't trying to be aholes, they are exercising strict "love" to save us from a Hell that they think is REAL. That ain't love, that's fear-mongering, and a God who'd condemn anyone to an eternity of suffering for rejecting unfounded nonsense is an asshole not worthy of worship to begin with. Why would an omscient God, knowing well in advance that his "beloved" children would fall, even create them and bestow them with free will to begin with? In my mind, not even the biggest perpetrators in history would be worthy of such a treatment. We're talking about eternity here. Sounds like they're Calvinists. I never understood, even as a Christian, how that was supposed to work. The Calvinist approach of pre-destination doesn't explain theodicy at all. It only affirms even further that the Biblical God is an asshole. And Portobella: you're awesome no matter what. Stay strong! 1
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