BarbarousBill Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Hello all, I was just writing because it occurred to me that almost all the advice stuff I ever hear about for marriage or dating or any life situation is either Christian, or somehow tied to grand schemas and worldviews. I was wondering if anyone had advice they'd give to other non-Christians at various stages in life, such as dating, marriage, finances, stuff like that. I thought it'd be cool since I don't know a lot of places that have stuff like that. Anywho here's my contribution, "If you're about to buy something and have a hard time deciding between the two, then get neither. You'll regret getting one or the other the rest of the day, and you'll have realized you wasted your money." Oh here's an other, "if you treat your girlfriend the way you want your daughter to be treated as her father, then you'll probably do okay in relationships." 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Don't get married, perhaps 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue elephant Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Don't get married before the age of 25 because your taste and your viewpoint changes. Never quit your job until you have another lined up. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted January 30, 2016 Super Moderator Share Posted January 30, 2016 Don't be a dick. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Don't get married. When she is older I'm going to tell my daughter that she never has to get married. Always spend less money than you make. Obey the law. Don't want what you can't have. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Obey the law. Unless the law is evil, then break the shit out of it. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Obey the law. Unless the law is evil, then break the shit out of it. I'm not the type who wants to rot in prison as some kind of political activist. I would rather avoid living in a place with evil laws. People can often relocate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbarousBill Posted January 30, 2016 Author Share Posted January 30, 2016 Nonviolence is always preferable. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Obey the law. Unless the law is evil, then break the shit out of it. I'm not the type who wants to rot in prison as some kind of political activist. I would rather avoid living in a place with evil laws. People can often relocate. Some laws just have to be broken. MLK understood this. Some laws deserve to be flouted. You're not going to go to prison for most of these; at least not yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeff Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Think. really think 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shinzon Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 Try to keep every option open 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
traveller2 Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 Don't become a christian. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bhim Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 Don't become a christian.Perhaps the best advice I've ever heard on this forum! Tangential thought: these words remind me of the "Don't become a scientist" article by Dr. Jonathan Katz posted to his Wash U web space over a decade ago. I can no longer find it there, but if I could I would contribute that essay as my advice for this thread, given all the people on ex C who share my affinity for science. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
violetbutterfly Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 "Everything happens for a reason" is bullshit. It's okay to be angry and grieve when shitty things happen to you or you lose someone you love. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dichotomy Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 "Everything happens for a reason" is bullshit. It's okay to be angry and grieve when shitty things happen to you or you lose someone you love. I think this is a really vital point. Sometimes life deals you a shitty card and no matter how you go about it, it doesn't work out as well as you'd want, and it's okay to find that hard. Don't respect authority for the sake of it. Question things and really think for yourself, but be wise. No point rebelling for the sake of it either. There is rarely a "right" life choice and a "wrong" one, most of the time you just have to do what feels best for you and that is realistically workable. There's no such thing as the perfect partner, "the one". Relationships can be complicated and hard work no matter how amazing and compatible you both are. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
violetbutterfly Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 There's no such thing as the perfect partner, "the one". Relationships can be complicated and hard work no matter how amazing and compatible you both are. However, you should never settle for a bad relationship just so you're not alone. And there is nothing wrong with divorce if you're miserable and your marriage is no longer working. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Live below your means. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 My dad used to say, "You may be able to break the laws of man, but you can't break the laws of nature." So you can take a gamble with, say, stealing something from a store, but don't expect to jump off a high cliff and not die. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Keep your eyes wide open before you get married. Keep them half shut afterwards. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 My grandmother said, "Poor people don't sin; only rich people can afford to sin." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VacuumFlux Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Don't be ashamed of your sexuality. Feel free to exercise it within in the limits of medical safety and informed consent. Don't let anyone shame you for having too much sex or for having too little (though if this is a recurring conflict in a long term relationship, it will need worked out and you should take the other's feelings seriously). Don't let anyone pressure you into sex you don't want (or even don't feel ready for right now but might want later), and if you're in a relationship with a person who does so repeatedly you should probably get out. Don't be vague about consent because you're afraid that it'll make you less "pure" even though you want things to happen - that's unfair to your partner (emotionally and legally), and may result in you having less of a good time if you won't let yourself fully participate. Or just missing out on something you wanted because they took you at your word and tried to show you respect. When you ask someone out and they turn you down, don't take it personally. It's probably not about you at all. Maybe they even think you're a great person but know that you'd have personality conflicts if you got too close. Maybe they have a lot going on in their life right now and aren't ready to start any new relationship with anyone. In the vast majority of situations, it's not a rejection of you as a valuable human being, and if you start thinking it is, your resentment will show and it'll make you less likely to get a yes from anyone in the future. Know where your money's going, even if you don't keep a formal budget. If you want a fun expensive toy, make a plan to save up for it instead of financing it. Save the loans for things like houses, cars, and starting a business. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Sex is how adults play together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Relax, keep a sense of humor, try to be sensible, and have some fun! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted February 3, 2016 Moderator Share Posted February 3, 2016 Keep yourself as fit and healthy as you can. It makes life easier. Don't smoke cigarettes. You'll regret it when you're older. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Be gentle with yourself. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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