Theophania Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Hi. I hate God. Or rather, I am now completely indifferent towards him. After all, the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. So instead of hating him, it'd be more accurate to say he is nothing to me now. Guess I should introduce myself before I tell my story. I was born and raised in Singapore, a small and humid Southeast Asian country. Many different religious groups live cheek by jowl here. My family are Christians......Protestants, to be exact. My parents converted to Christianity long before my oldest sibling was born, and made the rather erroneous decision to raise all of their children in the Christian faith. Some of my earliest memories are of me attending church services, singing the cheesy songs and listening to the rambling sermons alongside other faithful. If only I could go back in time and warn my younger self not to fall for it. Mental illness plagued me for about seven years. I underwent medical treatment and made a full recovery in the last quarter of 2010. Remained a Christian for four more years after that. What made me finally realize that I'd been lied to all my life? Well, what it really comes down to is that no one could answer my questions. When I asked why we had to discriminate against the LGBT community, I was told we had a duty to protect the "moral values of the conservative majority", whatever the hell that means. When I asked why couples should be obligated to have children even when one or both partners has no desire to start a family, I was told that we have to go forth and multiply regardless of our personal feelings on the matter. The older women in particular looked at me in disdain and were quick to condemn me as not having enough faith to be a good, virtuous Christian woman. Cell groups were expected to proselytize and recruit as many new members as possible, in order to fill some kind of BS quota. Had to attend lengthy sessions of so-called spiritual healing, where people wailed and screamed and fell down as imaginary demons were supposedly driven out of them, in scenes that would not look out of place in a B-grade horror movie. The church called this being "slain in the Spirit". In my first year of college, I finally decided I'd had enough and left for good. My parents still keep trying to drag me back into the fold. Father keeps making all kinds of pseudo-scientific claims and cites the Bible as his "evidence". Mother keeps sending me text messages exhorting me to call upon the Lord and rely on God's wisdom. This situation is probably never going to change until they die, because they are old and cling stubbornly to the past. They do not seem able to accept the fact that I am no longer enslaved to their brutal deity. Well, too bad for them. I am going to fully embrace the dark side and leave them behind in the ashes of yesterday. Embrace the dark side? Why, yes. I open my arms to scientific knowledge and reject the moral panic of religious fanatics. I turn away from the violence and cruelty of a truly appalling god who was invented by fallible humans. Lucifer (in the unlikely event that he exists) had the right idea, didn't he? Why stay in heaven and suffer under God's rule, when he could lead an uprising and enjoy life elsewhere? I think I've made my point. Thanks for reading. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjn Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Welcome to Ex-C!I'd be interested to hear more about religiosity in a culturally and religiously diverse country like Singapore, where Christians, Muslims, Buddhists and Hindus live, as you say, "cheek by jowl". How are fundamentalists (of any strain, not just Christian) able to maintain their narrow world-view in such a place, where they're constantly presented with alternatives? In some backwater town in the US, it's easy to see how such views can take root, but in a cosmopolitan city-state like Singapore? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StillLooking Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Hello there. I can relate a bit with you because I am a Chinese American who still have family members spread in the eastern part of Asia and most of my family members are either christians or catholics. They were baptized after they reached adulthood and so I feel they are clingier to their faith compare to other "regular" christians. After all being christian is the path that they chose themselves. I think one of the reason why christianity grows quite fast in East Asia is because the nature of the people who have similar views with christians. Obedience to authority, conservative family values, dislike of discourse, dislike of any kind of differences. Many of my older relatives are anti LGBT and racists and I believe this is one of the reasons why embracing christianity or catholicism seems like natural. I hope you can stave off your parents' push for you to come back joining the fold. Good luck. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geezer Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Fortunately God's only exist in the minds of believers. Unfortunately, it's those same believers that tend to be bat shit crazy & all too often dangerous. I'm happy that you figured out that all religions are pure nonsense. Welcome to reality. Pull up a chair & enjoy the show. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MOHO Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Theophania, Congrats on getting out! Don't hold your breat but have some hope that your folks will pull their collective head our of thier bum, afterall, I saw the light in mhy 50's. That's old, huh? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts