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ContraBardus

Jesus Could Not Have Been A Man If He Is The Result Of A Virgin Birth...

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Came across this in my travels through the interwebs, and I'll be damned if it does not make perfect sense.

 

y2C4Nu1.jpg

 

So, the only reasonable conclusion is that Jesus was either trans or one of the lizard people.

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C'mon, this is easy. God's way's are not man's ways & nothing is impossible for God. If God can fit all the Animals in the world in a boat, & raise Himself from the dead then He can create Himself inside a virgin human female. That would be like no big deal for God.

 

I'm thinking you don't have no faith at all. You seem to be thinking like a human that only believes in science & stuff like that. God don't need no science. God just spoke the world into exsistance or did you forget about that? X chromosome, give me a break. God don't need no chromosomes, cause He's God.

 

The Bible said it, I believe it, and that settles it. End of discussion.

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And there is no genetic bottleneck for adam and eve either :P

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I knew the lizard were out to get us. I know the Lizard king personally - true story.

 

One of points about God becoming man was to live as a human and experience human pain, but if he was virgin born with no sin then how could he possibly experience what its truly like to be human? And if God is God doesn't God already know everything... including what its like to be Human? I don't think religious people sit down and seriously think about the implications of there being an omnipresent, omniscient, Omni powerful god. It makes much of the bible teachings moot.

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Did Jesus ever get an erection? If he wanted the full human experience then he would have to have had a desire to be with a woman. That just doesn't fit the Jesus image though goes it? Hmmm. I suppose he died a virgin because Xiaity teaches that sex is sinful, so Jesus must have been a virgin. That makes me wonder if he was more than ready to go back to heaven since being totally sinless probably sucked. Just some random thoughts.

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You know, hanging around with 12 dudes all the time makes more sense if Jesus was a woman who cross dresssed. They were her harem.

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Jesus's Y chromosome came from The Holy Ghost's magic ghost semen.

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Guest Furball

Someone posted about this a while ago and yeah, it serves up another massive hole in the embarrassing jesus myth. 

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Guest

No it doesn't! I mean, yeah, science seems to indicate Jesus couldn't have been born of a virgin, but HAVENT you heard of the miracles of GAWD?

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Did Jesus ever get an erection? If he wanted the full human experience then he would have to have had a desire to be with a woman. That just doesn't fit the Jesus image though goes it? Hmmm. I suppose he died a virgin because Xiaity teaches that sex is sinful, so Jesus must have been a virgin. That makes me wonder if he was more than ready to go back to heaven since being totally sinless probably sucked. Just some random thoughts.

 

This one always made me laugh. If he was fully a human, then he either spent his life masturbating or subjecting himself to serious emotional and physical damage by 'denying his flesh'. There is just no way around this one for believers except to just ignore the problem.

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