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The Fear of Hell Never Goes Away


nightflight
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Decade after decade it follows me, the fear that it might be true after all, somehow.  Even when you know science, biblical contradictions, discrepancies, unfulfilled prophecies, etc. and you know the whole thing is bullshit, there remains the dark fear that a moment after you die there is eternal suffering.

 

The worst part of this is that it takes away the one thing that can give a person hope in this harsh world and that is the choice to end one's life.  Suicide should be a sweet gift one give's to one's self, but Christianity cruelly takes that away.  The one thing that should be the ultimate relief meets the ultimate despair.  So one is left stuck, playing around with danger hoping that oblivion will be met, fearful though of the darkest dreams spawned from the minds of clergymen and theologians.  

 

Life is a nightmare; Christianity makes it more so.

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I can't say the fear of hell is still present in my life; but I can certainly relate to the idea of ending one's life on one's own terms.  So many of the circumstances of our lives are beyond our control; why wouldn't a person want some level of control over how it all ends?  

 

Besides, I don't want to live under certain circumstances--90 years old and unable to wipe my own ass, or hooked up to life support, or in a vegetative state.  I also don't want to wait until diabetes takes both my feet and destroys my kidneys, or cancer (and chemo) sucks all that is good from my life.

 

Fortunately, I know that alcohol nearly killed me before I quit drinking.  So, whenever I decide my time has come, I just need a bottle of Bourbon.  

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Yeah, I'm not afraid of hell anymore, either. When the subject comes up, my mind already has it categorized in the same folder with talking snakes, talking donkeys, dragons that knock stars out of the sky with their tails, people waking on water, unicorns and satyrs. 

 

Can't forget the satyrs. Everybody always forgets the satyrs.

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God, Christianity, the Bible, Heaven & Hell all have a history that can be traced & verified. In other words they have human origins, beliefs, & traditions. If you want to know where the concept of hell came from just google it. Lots of books have been written about this subject.

 

When we die that's it. There isn't anything else. People who take their own life are very selfish. They seemingly never consider the pain & heartache they cause for those they leave behind. If you are seriously considering taking your own life I hope you will seek some professional help, and also give some thought to your loved ones that you'll leave behind & what that will do to them. 

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I do not fear hell nowadays anymore than I get mad at Santa for sucky gifts. 

 

I am deprogrammed in that area at least. 

 

Good luck. 

 

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NightFlight,

 

After sufficient exposure to reality (call it deprogramming if you must) you will lose that nagging little "what if" in your head. You will then be able to live your life w/out fear.

 

You may, however, feel some anger towards those who told you tear fear hell in the first place. That's OK...for a while, but try to understand that, at least for the other sheeple in the pews, they are just as innocently duped as you were. The pastors, and anyone else who has a monetary or control interest, well it's OK to harbor some ill feelings towards them.

 

Tell THEM what farging coke-sockers they are next time you see them! :P

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3 hours ago, nightflight said:

 

 

 

The fear of Hell never left me even as a Christian, which is a big reason I left it. I thought Jesus was supposed to comfort me and take those fears away. That was supposed to be one of the things he was supposed to bless me with, right? They use fear of Hell to convert you, but then they ratchet it up even more in order to keep you in the fold, so you end up living in constant fear, which goes against all the verses that talk about how he is supposed to comfort you. A glaring inconsistency.

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The Bible is not really the reason I have any lingering doubts about Christianity's falsehood. The Near Death Experience and miracle stories still creep me out. I'm told that miracles don't happen in the first world, but blind people see the instant they are prayed for in Africa and Asia, but only if they are prayed for in the name of Jesus. Since lying is one of the worst sins of Christianity, what is going on with missionaries in less developed countries?

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     So you want to kill yourself but you're afraid of going to hell?  Sounds like you've got bigger problems than a fear of hell.

 

          mwc

 

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5 hours ago, nightflight said:

Decade after decade it follows me, the fear that it might be true after all, somehow.  Even when you know science, biblical contradictions, discrepancies, unfulfilled prophecies, etc. and you know the whole thing is bullshit, there remains the dark fear that a moment after you die there is eternal suffering.

 

The worst part of this is that it takes away the one thing that can give a person hope in this harsh world and that is the choice to end one's life.  Suicide should be a sweet gift one give's to one's self, but Christianity cruelly takes that away.  The one thing that should be the ultimate relief meets the ultimate despair.  So one is left stuck, playing around with danger hoping that oblivion will be met, fearful though of the darkest dreams spawned from the minds of clergymen and theologians.  

 

Life is a nightmare; Christianity makes it more so.

 

I don't know what to tell you so you won't fear Hell.  I have neither belief in nor fear of Hell.  I worry about jumbo jets falling on my house more than I worry about going to Hell.  And I don't live near an airport.  It's just not gonna happen. 

 

But there is a type of Hell you should be worried about: the living Hell that your friends and family would endure if you were to take your life.  I know people in despair sometimes think they would be doing everybody a favor if they were gone, but what they leave behind is the agony of thinking they could have, should have done SOMETHING...  

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As long as I can still get a beer, a smoke, a bit of the other and a decent hand of cards, I don't care if the bloody place DOES exist!

 

Casey

 

PS I don't smoke in this life any more but when I'm dead and in Hell, what harm is smoking going to do? Kill me?

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Those continually courting suicidal thoughts need professional help, none of which is available here. Please, get some serious help. Imaginary hell is not the problem.

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Please do not contemplate self termination. The damage it does to your family is horrific.

 

As for Hell, it is unlikely, very very unlikely.

 

Millions have lived and died without so much as hearing of Christianity, what are the odds these same people are now being tortured by an invisible angry being who likes the smell of burning animal fats  and gets annoyed if your beard is the wrong shape. 

 

I don't pretend to know what lays beyond the grave, but the chances that Christianity is true is so low, It rarely causes me much worry. 

 

Please be kind to yourself and be kind to those that care about you. 

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I want to argue that it's more than just christianity that condemns suicide. People everywhere of all faiths will condemn suicide. There's a wicked aspect to humanity, to life that resists suicide. You stand at the threshold. You want to take that step. There is no christian, no muslim, no buddhist, no parent or child around to say anything. There's the inner voice that resists. Fucking inner voice. If it weren't for that inner voice... There's some part of life that doesn't want suicide.

 

It's not hell. It's not christianity. It's more than that. It's some force of life. 

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I don't fear hell anymore.  I've said this a couple of times before.  Modern science shows us that the physical brain is responsible for our thoughts, disposition and deeds.  There is no need for a immatetial magical soul.  If your brain stops working you are no more.  There is no magical soul or spirit or heaven.  Once you think about it logically you see that the physical brain is like a super computer developed through evolution.  Hell doesn't make sense. 

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5 hours ago, SerenelyBlue said:

I don't fear hell anymore.  I've said this a couple of times before.  Modern science shows us that the physical brain is responsible for our thoughts, disposition and deeds.  There is no need for a immatetial magical soul.  If your brain stops working you are no more.  There is no magical soul or spirit or heaven.  Once you think about it logically you see that the physical brain is like a super computer developed through evolution.  Hell doesn't make sense. 

 

SerentityBlue,

 

Having read your posts in recent months, I suggest to read Daniel Dennett's just released book From Bacteria to Bach and Back.

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I forgot about my post.  I'm still here at the moment; I do know about the history of Xianity and origins of hell, but my mind is such that there's always that space that gives credence to things, that says maybe this can be true somehow.  It's irrational, but powerful enough to spook me.   

 

Geezer:

People who take their own life are very selfish. They seemingly never consider the pain & heartache they cause for those they leave behind. If you are seriously considering taking your own life I hope you will seek some professional help, and also give some thought to your loved ones that you'll leave behind & what that will do to them.

 

What's selfish is anyone who would demand someone else continue to suffer just so they can be spared a little soul-searching.  But I don't have to worry about any of that anyway; I don't have "loved ones," I have a few relatives, one who owes me a G.  

 

mwc:

So you want to kill yourself but you're afraid of going to hell?  Sounds like you've got bigger problems than a fear of hell.

 

My problem is a medical condition that doesn't respond to therapy or medicine.  I've lost my job and will be homeless soon.  Three years of exhaustion, with no hope of remedy.  I'm not some teenager kvetching over a girlfriend or school.  I am sick constantly and soon will know poverty and homelessness.  Quality of life matters; mere existence is not a virtue.  

 

ThereAndBack:

But there is a type of Hell you should be worried about: the living Hell that your friends and family would endure if you were to take your life.  I know people in despair sometimes think they would be doing everybody a favor if they were gone, but what they leave behind is the agony of thinking they could have, should have done SOMETHING...

 

I don't care if it bother others; it won't anyway.  The would probably be some who would say, "I wish he would have called me," but people always say that when someone they know offs himself.  People find it disturbing when another dies at his own hand.  It's a judgement on life itself, and causes people to wonder if living is all that good, and what misery they might be in one day themselves. People don't really care, they just want to virtue-signal to others that they do.  I had a friend that offed himself in 2011.  When I found out the reason why, the lack of hope he had, I had to agree that he had no other choice.  Sometimes it is the only choice.  I would doubt anyone here would have an objection to someone icing themselves because of chronic pain.  Well, some other conditions are chronic too.

 

Florduh:

Those continually courting suicidal thoughts need professional help, none of which is available here. Please, get some serious help. Imaginary hell is not the problem.

 

My medical condition can't be helped by a psych.  In fact, I can say with absolute certainty, that if I wasn't laid out everyday with exhaustion, I would be remarkably undepressed.  It's not in my head (except the fear of hell part).  

 

Garry:

Please do not contemplate self termination. The damage it does to your family is horrific.

 

Fuck 'em.  

 

Voice:

I want to argue that it's more than just christianity that condemns suicide. People everywhere of all faiths will condemn suicide. There's a wicked aspect to humanity, to life that resists suicide. You stand at the threshold. You want to take that step. There is no christian, no muslim, no buddhist, no parent or child around to say anything. There's the inner voice that resists. Fucking inner voice. If it weren't for that inner voice... There's some part of life that doesn't want suicide.

 

It's not hell. It's not christianity. It's more than that. It's some force of life.

 

Quality of life matters.  I don't ask for much, just that I don't have to face this shitty world exhausted.  It's not worth it; there's no payoff.

 

SerenityBlue;

I don't fear hell anymore.  I've said this a couple of times before.  Modern science shows us that the physical brain is responsible for our thoughts, disposition and deeds.  There is no need for a immatetial magical soul.  If your brain stops working you are no more.  There is no magical soul or spirit or heaven.  Once you think about it logically you see that the physical brain is like a super computer developed through evolution.  Hell doesn't make sense.

 

I need to convince myself that this is true to the extent that I harbor no doubts about it.  Then I can have peace.

 

I've been to doctors, tried devices, pills, potions, suggestions, etc., to no avail.  I've got to go.  I'm pushing 50, no money, no job, and a chronic illness that doesn't respond to therapy.  And I've come across a lot of people with the same ailment that also complain of lack of relief.  Some things are just hopeless, its a brute fact.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I'm so sorry Nightflight. So very sorry. I wish I had a million dollars and a magic wand to make everything better. Just wanted to give you an internet hug. 

 

((hug))

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1 hour ago, nightflight said:

Geezer:

 

What's selfish is anyone who would demand someone else continue to suffer just so they can be spared a little soul-searching.  But I don't have to worry about any of that anyway; I don't have "loved ones," I have a few relatives, one who owes me a G. 

 

Garry:

 

Fuck 'em. 

 

Right on.  I liked your post because I agree with you on many things, especially the above.    In your defense, people who say shit about suicide like "it's selfish",  " it's cowardly",  "think about family" blah blah, really shouldn't say anything if they don't know you, or haven't walked in your shoes.    To me it's like kicking someone in the gut when they are already down.  How the hell is that supposed to help someone?  

 

My situation, while not as dire as yours, is similar in that I am not close to anyone, single, have no family to speak of, etc.   When god was dealing out the cards for my life, I got a really shitty hand in the family department.  And as for my lack of friends and close relationships, I am a loner and just don't really bond with people.  I didn't have much choice in that either, I am who I am.   But, those facts do make me vulnerable if/when something happens that I can't control, and I have no support system or help.  That scares the shit out of me, so I completely and totally feel what you're going through. 

 

Suicide is one of those slippery slope topics for me.  I don't recommend that people do it, but having been suicidal myself many times during my life (and even recently), I am not going to delude myself or anyone else that if we just think about puppies and rainbows all day that the world will magically become puppies and rainbows.  That's just not how life works.

 

As for your condition, is there disability or social services available to you where you live?  

 

I wish I had something encouraging to say, but I have no words other than you are not alone brother.

 

 

 

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The fear of hell is piggy-back to the fear of death and the grief of loss of living. Add the abusive threat of hell by clod (god) and it is horrible. 

I don't want to die, nor do I happen to look forward to it because I look forward to love here on earth and don't know of any possibility of awareness after death...but I can imagine no greater hell than life with the god of the bible and the ardent followers of his hate and inhuman acts. I am more afraid of heaven with god and could only hope of a future wherein clod is dethroned from the minds of citizens. The sooner the better. 

Consider the way to live here so fully, you never think of death, or worse yet, living forever with that ultimate source of arrogant immorality...clod.

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On 3/8/2017 at 1:11 PM, megasamurai said:

The Bible is not really the reason I have any lingering doubts about Christianity's falsehood. The Near Death Experience and miracle stories still creep me out. I'm told that miracles don't happen in the first world, but blind people see the instant they are prayed for in Africa and Asia, but only if they are prayed for in the name of Jesus. Since lying is one of the worst sins of Christianity, what is going on with missionaries in less developed countries?

]\;'./,

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As for your condition, is there disability or social services available to you where you live?  

 

Technically, I'm "treated," so there is no hope for any disability.  I either have to do it myself or ride out the rest of my days.  I've been squeezing my throat really hard to try to acclimate myself to it.  

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It's a dilemma, suicide. I'm sorry, man, I am. As many respondents I overcame fear of hell also, but I've not been able to step to the other side either. There's some fundamental force of life that persists and resists. In a spectrum of colors the christian hell is just one color of it. In hex it would be something like #ff0000, or maybe #ff6600. Fear not christian hell. Fear the natural, insurmountable force of life. It's a fucker.

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