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Xiana

Joel Osteen's tweets - "god" replaced with "your dick"

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This is a goodie.. apologies if it's been shared before!

 

http://thegoodlordabove.com/twitter-bot-replaces-god-joel-osteens-tweets-dick-god-responds/

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Saw this yesterday. It's hilarious. 

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Truly inspirational. This makes so much more sense than Joel's typical preaching fare. My life is forever changed!

 

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some 'magnifying' to do...:wicked:

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"Stop worrying about all of your problems. Just let go and let your dick lead you!"

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MAWHAHAHA

 

I'm snorting at work. Sorry gota go - crack up! Haha

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Oh lmao that was to funny. Thanks for sharing xiana! 

 

I have one. I was watching him one time. He was telling people to open a bank account and prepare for God to fill it.

 

So open a bank account and prepare for your dick to fill it! Lmao!

 

DB

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Too funny!!!!  This one cracked me up:

The odds may be against you, but your dick is for you. He is more powerful than any force that’s trying to stop you.

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Quote

When your dick can trust you to be faithful in the ordinary, then He will take you into the extraordinary.

That'll be my personal favourite.

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Guest

OMG, this made my day! LOL

Ya know, bible verses could use the same substitute:

Genesis 4:1

Adam made love to his wife Eve, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Cain.She said, “With the help of your dick I have brought forth a man.” Later she gave birth to his brother Abel.

Bwahahaha!

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Bwahh! ^^^

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On 5/3/2017 at 8:10 PM, Faithfulless said:

OMG, this made my day! LOL

Ya know, bible verses could use the same substitute:

Genesis 4:1

Adam made love to his wife Eve, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Cain.She said, “With the help of your dick I have brought forth a man.” Later she gave birth to his brother Abel.

Bwahahaha!

 

What if 'the Lord' was Eve's nickname for Adam's abnormally large package? 

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Heres a joke:

What was the first thing Adam ever said to Eve????

 

Stand back baby.... I dont know how big this thing is gonna get!

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22 hours ago, SkepticsApprentice said:

 

What if 'the Lord' was Eve's nickname for Adam's abnormally large package? 

 

This changes everything!!! I may have to crack open my dusty old bible to read through with this new twist.

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