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In the Beginning, Mothafuckas.

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On 9/18/2017 at 10:11 AM, God said:

 

Never tried that, but I can tell you that I tried to program humanity. It got pretty large and complex....Can't beat them myself.

 

 

Which programming language did you use to program humanity? Also, do you have access to any flow charts or pseudo-code to share with us?

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On ‎19‎/‎09‎/‎2017 at 2:11 AM, God said:

 

Never tried that, but I can tell you that I tried to program humanity. It got pretty large and complex....Can't beat them myself.

 

 

 

I hear iron chariots give you trouble....

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On 12/09/2017 at 1:40 PM, God said:

I take great pleasure in being an asshole, so thanks for noticing. A lot of people seem to worship me for some reason and don't take notice of all the asshole stuff I do. Luckily I can just smite people at my fancy. 

 

The short answer to the omnipotence thing is no. Because omnipotence is a (wait for it) logical fallacy. But if you want to be more prepared for an argument with a christian, you should google the omnipotence paradox. That way you can show them you've looked into it before you tell them that the omnipotence paradox doesn't change the the rock scenario is still fallacious. Another good one is to ask if I can make a prison so strong I can't escape, gets their little minds working.

 

The freewill thing is kinda like having a dog. You're a gentile, you'd know that you're the dog in this example. You know how batshit they go for a bone or a walk....you know that when you ring the doorbell or have a sandwich they are GOING to bark or beg....you even know that they will occasionally piss in the house. So, even though you know they're going to do it,  you let them. What you need to focus on in this example is that, as the owner, you will taunt them with a sandwich and then punish them for salivating. You will offer the bone and then hide it from them. You punish them for shit they don't understand. And they just better goddamn sit when you tell them or they are going the pound. Ya know? It's a bitch.

 

Unless of course you don't treat dogs this way, which just circles back to the asshole attribute of mine. Takeaway, you're probably better and more moral than me, since I am a figment of the dark ages' imagination.

But God, your Christians will say to me yes their God can create a prison so strong that this God can't escape. But, their God is choosing not to do so. Just like they believe that Jesus when he lived on earth had the power to sin, but he chose not to sin. 

Erm God your bible says that your Holy spirit will guide people who pray. In the Old Testament, there are many passages about how God will guide a person if they worship and pray. I did all that for years, but still you didn't guide me when I prayed for your wisdom and guidance. Why God? And because you didn't guide me, I ended up crying for years over wrong choices I made, which at the time made sense to me. Why didn't you show me the true nature of those who took away my happy nature? I can't laugh like I used to any more- one reason for this is listening to one of your world famous Joyce Meyer and following her crazy teachings. I am an exanple of how Joyce Meyer does not hear from God- either she is delusional or crazy or a big liar and con woman.

Yours faithfully,

A little angel who loved you once.

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On 10/4/2017 at 5:23 PM, ChelseaGuy said:

Which programming language did you use to program humanity? Also, do you have access to any flow charts or pseudo-code to share with us?

 

I'd wager on Pascal myself. ;) Sorry if that's BASIC.

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God is back in the house!

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On 9/11/2017 at 7:45 AM, God said:

Hello, measly creation. I've been meaning to drop in here, just had a lot going on with my wrath against humanity and all. Irma was a bitch to get going and I've got a lot going on with all those fires, trying to demonstrate my displeasure at the general midwest. I'll drop in every now and then to clarify my divine words, I know how everyone clings to them. Now, by all means, tone down the worship so that we can get shit down around here. Got any questions for me? (You better not question me TOO much, hell is hot year round...)

You know God, by all means, I certainly don't mean any disrespect so please hold off on the divine judgement and everlasting wrath, but I really think I speak for everyone when I say you could really use a beer.

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On 11/4/2017 at 2:36 PM, ToddJ said:

You know God, by all means, I certainly don't mean any disrespect so please hold off on the divine judgement and everlasting wrath, but I really think I speak for everyone when I say you could really use a beer.

 

I'm a bit of an angry drunk. There used to be more continents, but.......yeah.

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On 11/7/2017 at 2:44 PM, God said:

 

I'm a bit of an angry drunk. There used to be more continents, but.......yeah.

 

A bit of an angry drunk? That's how I know you are fake. The God we left behind was the real God.  He was a good looking surfer dude type with a swinging dick he never used his whole life despite the groupies that surrounded him. He made wine that was so good at a wedding party once that even the drunk people that usually can't tell when the Natty Ice is served when the Coors runs out could tell that he made the good stuff. 

Plus he wasn't angry. Our One True God had changed from the dick he used to be and mellowed out until you could punch him him with a right cross (no pun intended), and he would turn his cheek so you could hit hit him again with a left cross.

We also know that our One True God won't turn into a murderous dick again until Armageddon, when he comes back with ten thousand saints, a two edged sword coming out of his mouth, wearing a golden girdle, riding a horse, and having a new name written on his thigh that only some people know. So stuff your anger. You had your chance.

Until Armageddon then, "God", you need to keep your mouth shut. You are the one that used to be the boss, but then you let your idiot kid take over and muck up everything you worked so hard to do.

I've read pretty much all of your biography/ autobiography through the years and I can see that you are confused. So then, welcome to Ex-C. Stick around, we'll get you sorted out.

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On 9/11/2017 at 7:45 AM, God said:

Hello, measly creation. I've been meaning to drop in here, just had a lot going on with my wrath against humanity and all. Irma was a bitch to get going and I've got a lot going on with all those fires, trying to demonstrate my displeasure at the general midwest. I'll drop in every now and then to clarify my divine words, I know how everyone clings to them. Now, by all means, tone down the worship so that we can get shit down around here. Got any questions for me? (You better not question me TOO much, hell is hot year round...)

The real God does not mind being questioned. You, sir, are a god in your own mind. It’s alright- you are not the first man to think he is bigger than he is.

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On 9/11/2017 at 8:46 AM, God said:

 

For being an omniscient and omnipotent being I can't get the fucking like button to work. Also, sounds like you got your priorities mixed up because I am the one and only god, I cannot be likened to this facebook god of yours. It is my face and my book alone you should worship.

God has no face, nice try, punk.

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On 9/11/2017 at 3:44 PM, God said:

 

All your talking is proof of my benevolent free will. Otherwise I've have shut you up a long time ago. Thanks for the welcome, but I'm God and I don't need it.

Ah, but God does wait to be invited. He stands at the door and knocks. He will move Heaven and Earth to reach you, but stands at the door and knocks. God is a gentleman.

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On 9/14/2017 at 7:26 AM, God said:

 

The cock came first, that's the only one that matters.

Are you homosexual then, since chicks are not important?

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And yet, God still loves you- although you mock Him and mock the people who love Him. God really is magnificent.

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1 hour ago, PennySerenade said:

And yet, God still loves you- although you mock Him and mock the people who love Him. God really is magnificent.

 

Are you a doubter or a believer? Your profile is confusing. If you're not a Christian you can edit your profile. If you are a Christian are you questioning your faith & beliefs?  Either way, welcome aboard.

 

Either way why not introduce yourself & tell us a little about you. 

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3 hours ago, PennySerenade said:

And yet, God still loves you- although you mock Him and mock the people who love Him. God really is magnificent.

Except when he has 42 kids killed by a bear, eh?

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3 hours ago, PennySerenade said:

The real God does not mind being questioned. You, sir, are a god in your own mind. It’s alright- you are not the first man to think he is bigger than he is.

I wonder if losing one's sense of humor is a prerequisite for becoming a Christian.

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Just now, ExTeknon said:

I wonder if losing one's sense of humor is a prerequisite for becoming a Christian.

No, it isn’t. I believe I know this member from another site, and am just disappointed that he is an antagonistic atheist. I knew he was an atheist or deist, but not antagonistic toward Christians. It is not the content as much as it is the person writing the content that made me angry and sad. 

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1 hour ago, Geezer said:

 

Are you a doubter or a believer? Your profile is confusing. If you're not a Christian you can edit your profile. If you are a Christian are you questioning your faith & beliefs?  Either way, welcome aboard.

 

Either way why not introduce yourself & tell us a little about you. 

I am a believer. I had a friend who wanted me to come here as he said I needed to not be isolated and insulated by Christians. 

 

I did not want to post here, as I am not an apologist or theologian and a bad Christian. 

 

My friend cut off contact with me yesterday as he said I am a closed minded lemon and I am what is wrong with the universe. 

 

I feel sad that an atheist no longer wishes to be friends with me due to my faith. I guess I am posting in hopes he will deign to talk to me. 

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5 minutes ago, PennySerenade said:

... I am not an apologist or theologian and a bad Christian. 

 

It makes me very sad to see you say this about yourself, in a way that seems like you are being hard on yourself. 

 

Religion brings so much guilt into peoples lives. 

If you are a decent human being, then just smile and be happy. You are one of the good people, whether you are religious or not. 

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17 minutes ago, PennySerenade said:

I am a believer. I had a friend who wanted me to come here as he said I needed to not be isolated and insulated by Christians. 

 

I did not want to post here, as I am not an apologist or theologian and a bad Christian. 

 

My friend cut off contact with me yesterday as he said I am a closed minded lemon and I am what is wrong with the universe. 

 

I feel sad that an atheist no longer wishes to be friends with me due to my faith. I guess I am posting in hopes he will deign to talk to me. 

 

I think your friend is just frustrated. Penny, as I noted in another post, we're here to educate not change your beliefs. You mentioned in another post that you thought atheists think Christians are ignorant. That is no more true that Christians saying all atheists are sin loving scumbags. I doubt many people, if any, had a sudden change in their morals when they left Xianity. Believers and non-believers have some wrong headed beliefs and opinions about each other. I assure you the Devil doesn't have a condo on this site. :D

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6 minutes ago, Geezer said:

 

I think your friend is just frustrated. Penny, as I noted in another post, we're here to educate not change your beliefs. You mentioned in another post that you thought atheists think Christians are ignorant. That is no more true that Christians saying all atheists are sin loving scumbags. I doubt many people, if any, had a sudden change in their morals when they left Xianity. Believers and non-believers have some wrong headed beliefs and opinions about each other. I assure you the Devil doesn't have a condo on this site. :D

I don’t think atheists are amoral scumbags. Perhaps he is frustrated with me, I sometimes feel like I am lacking in intelligence in his mind as I believe in God. 

 

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17 minutes ago, Jeff said:

 

It makes me very sad to see you say this about yourself, in a way that seems like you are being hard on yourself. 

 

Religion brings so much guilt into peoples lives. 

If you are a decent human being, then just smile and be happy. You are one of the good people, whether you are religious or not. 

I meant that I am not a good specimen of a Christian. 

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