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shelleymak6376

Newbie to the exChristian world

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On 3/1/2018 at 10:01 AM, shelleymak6376 said:

Hey guys... I'm new to the site & newly ex-Christian.  Born & raised in a southern Baptist family, I am now 41yrs old.  I married a Christian minister in '96 and we had 2 kids.  We continued in the Baptist religion & raised our kids in its teachings.     Fast forward about 20yrs - I started stepping away from Christianity. Bored & worn out with all the "churchy" stuff.  It felt so fake to me.  I quit going & I started re-examining my entire life.  I divorced the minister, married an atheist!  lol.  (side note: I never knew he was an atheist - we never talked about religion).  He's been so good though.  He hasn't pressured me in any direction.  So last year we started watching that Scientology series by Leah Rimini.  Its funny because I actually think everything started making sense when I started watching those shows - I was like "that is such a cult!  I can't believe people would believe such nonsense & follow it without question."   It was then that I started researching more into my own faith.  Much to my surprise, I saw some of the same type things in my own religion!!  Believing nonsense blindly, but calling it "faith"...and so much more.  I remember thinking "I can't believe Scientologists believe in the Xenu story".... but yet I believed the story about Eve and a talking snake.  It was like a light bulb came on in my brainwashed mind.   And immediately I felt sick & like I was going to pass out.  Everything I had ever been taught & raised was "right" was suddenly a bunch of lies.  Anyone else feel this way?  I'm still in the early stage of de-conversion... any advice to share?  I have read so many posts on this site & it has helped me SOOOOOO much!  I feel such a connection with many of you!!  

3

 

Hi shelley! Welcome to Ex-c ! I also felt sick like I was going to pass out the night it hit me that christianity was all a lie. What a ride. I couldn't have made it without this support group and I'm so glad you found us!! Looking forward to hearing more from you!

 

(hug)

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Hi @Margee  thank you!  :)  I'm soooo glad I have found this site too.  It has helped a bunch to know that I have someone to talk to that has experienced the same thing.  My husband is an atheist, but he was never involved in Christianity.  So while I can talk to him & he listens to me (he is so sweet & understanding), but he doesn't fully understand what all I'm thinking & experiencing.   And 99% of my family are Christians....so I definitely can't talk to them.  lol.  So thank you for your kindness & welcoming me to the group!!

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Hi Shelley, and welcome. I'm a 76'er myself. lol

 

My girlfriend is going through something similar. Divorced a fundy husband after 21 years and now she's with me, an agnostic atheist. We're, shall we say, cultural Adventist's. Don't believe it at all, but are around a lot of SDA's in the community with friends and family. 

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Hi @Joshpantera  I mean, 76'ers are awesome.  What can I say!  lol.  Your gf's story does sound a lot like mine!  I was married to a minister for 19yrs.  So I feel her pain.  haha.  I don't really know much about SDA... I was raised Baptist.  What are the differences?  just curious...

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@shelleymak6376

 

They're both conservative fundamentalist's. The SDA's are less mainstream, though, and cultish. Here's a video that contrasts SDA's with mainstream christian fundies: 

 

 

It's wacky. But I've found that having grown up in this church, I do better with girls that also grew up the same way and have since left, as I have. It just makes for a very concise commonality that I don't have with anyone from outside of this cultural environment. 

 

FYI, I'm related to William Miller. So the family goes back to before the creation of SDAism and then has been involved in it from the beginning. 

 

Until me! lol

 

I've influenced most of the family out of the church, less a few aunt's and uncles that still cling to it. 

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36 minutes ago, Joshpantera said:

 

 

It's wacky. But I've found that having grown up in this church, I do better with girls that also grew up the same way and have since left, as I have. It just makes for a very concise commonality that I don't have with anyone from outside of this cultural environment. 

 

FYI, I'm related to William Miller. So the family goes back to before the creation of SDAism and then has been involved in it from the beginning. 

 

Until me! lol

 

I've influenced most of the family out of the church, less a few aunt's and uncles that still cling to it. 

 

 

Are there many Sevent Day Adventists in your part of the world?  You’re in Florida, right?  I don’t know that I’ve ever met any SDAs.

 

Good on you for the influence you’ve had.  Of those that have left, have any left religion/theism completely?  Seems like you would be pretty persuasive in that direction...

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2 hours ago, ThereAndBackAgain said:

 

Are there many Sevent Day Adventists in your part of the world?  You’re in Florida, right?  I don’t know that I’ve ever met any SDAs.

 

Good on you for the influence you’ve had.  Of those that have left, have any left religion/theism completely?  Seems like you would be pretty persuasive in that direction...

 

Yeah, Florida has a lot of SDA's. California, Tennessee and Michigan are top spots for SDA's as well. But they're all over the country. 

 

This goes back to the mid 1800's in my family. Prior to that they were assorted Methodist's and Baptist's who got caught up in the "end times" movement of SDAism and converted over. I'm the oldest of my generation on both sides of the family. My immediate family has gone atheist for the most part. My dad is clearly an agnostic theist, though. He want's nothing to do with organized religion any more but believes there's something behind creation, he just doesn't profess to know what that may be. So going back to our other conversation, he's the classic example of an agnostic theist. 

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@Joshpantera  Thank you for sharing the video!  Very interesting!!!  I wish I could say that I have influenced most of my family OUT of the church.... maybe one day!

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Guest end3

Welcome Shelley!  Would love to visit with you about you being completely wrong.  Lol, I'm teasing.  Welcome.....bunch of good people here.

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1 hour ago, end3 said:

Welcome Shelley!  Would love to visit with you about you being completely wrong.  Lol, I'm teasing.  Welcome.....bunch of good people here.

end3. You are a christian on this sight!

How are you possibly “teasing” about Shelleymak6376 being completely wrong?

 

Hi Shelley. Welcome. 

 

Christians arent allowed to witness here outside of the Lions Den. Thats why Im surprised at end3’s comment. 

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18 hours ago, Jeff said:

end3. You are a christian on this sight!

How are you possibly “teasing” about Shelleymak6376 being completely wrong?

 

Hi Shelley. Welcome. 

 

Christians arent allowed to witness here outside of the Lions Den. Thats why Im surprised at end3’s comment. 

Hi @Jeff  thanks for the welcome!!  Everyone has been so very nice... I am so grateful!  After 39yrs in Christianity, I really have very few non-Christian friends.  So its nice to have a place to go to & people to talk to!  :)

 

 

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20 hours ago, end3 said:

Welcome Shelley!  Would love to visit with you about you being completely wrong.  Lol, I'm teasing.  Welcome.....bunch of good people here.

Hi @end3  thank you for the welcome!  

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