Jesus Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 I could use some advice from atheists specifically here. I recently deconverted in July of this year. 19 year fundamentalist -born again type. Since that time, I have been trying to figure out what exactly I believe in now. It started out as some form of personal deism. While that may be possible and even logical, I can’t prove that. And my form of diesm definelty didn’t include worship. When it comes to Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Buddhism etc, I’m atheist. All the way atheist. Feels good to say that. Any man made god is highly suspect and I just don’t believe in it. However, the idea of something ‘out there’ which is the source of life or the universe, I’m open to. I have a hard time believing we are the smartest thing out there we know of. I’m not open to worshiping anything nor do I think I am required to beleive in a god. But in my mind, I have a hard time going full atheist on saying I don’t beleive. I actually just don’t know. It seems logical to observe that I am a conscious intelligent being therefore there is probably something in the universe or outside of the known universe that is smarter than me. For me it goes back to origins of the Big Bang and what initiated the explosion of energy. Everything after that is whatever. Sure. Evolution is a scientific fact and I accept that. Again I’m not talking about a god as we know it. It could be. It could be Elvis Presley for all I give a damn. The point is I see some form of intention which I don’t have an explanation for. The thought of life and its existence is at times, overwhelming for me. The odds of it all don’t add up. Would believing in the universe as being conscious constitute belief in a god? It seems to me that I am atheist but since I still have those thoughts it makes me wonder. This has really been annoying because I ask these questions with all the honesty I know to possess yet I can’t answer them myself. I’m open to ideas that we are a science experiment, simulation etc. But that’s all they are; ideas. Not sure if my rambling makes any sense but any help would be appreciated. I’d like to just call myself an atheist and be done with it but these nagging thoughts will always be with me I suppose. At any rate, I suppose I’m in the atheist camp at a minimum. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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