NeverHealed52Years Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 On 12/11/2018 at 8:37 PM, TruthSeeker0 said: Do you want the truth...well love itself isn't enough in a lot of cases...you need to have common values and a similar worldview for it to work. Someone123, Listen to this advice above. I married the right man the first time and have been married 42 1/2 years.. We are also best friends, if she is just your wife but Not your best friend and kindred spirit she will be useless when the really hard parts of life come along. You need a women who "has your back". You can get this right IF you are very smart and careful about who you hook up with. Truthseeker0 has it correct, this was me and my hubby " love itself isn't enough .............you need to have common values and a similar worldview for it to work." If you don't have those two life can be and often is hell on earth! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
older Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 One more echo of all the above: She sees you as a project. She'll try to save you and it will go on forever. Yeah, it's difficult, but you need to block her calls, ignore her texts, and move on. Take it from everyone above. This does not look like something that will last. This is like an impacted wisdom tooth. You can suffer the pain now and say goodbye to it or wait until it will be much worse after it festers for a few years. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeeker0 Posted December 16, 2018 Share Posted December 16, 2018 4 hours ago, NeverHealed52Years said: Someone123, Listen to this advice above. I married the right man the first time and have been married 42 1/2 years.. We are also best friends, if she is just your wife but Not your best friend and kindred spirit she will be useless when the really hard parts of life come along. You need a women who "has your back". You can get this right IF you are very smart and careful about who you hook up with. Truthseeker0 has it correct, this was me and my hubby " love itself isn't enough .............you need to have common values and a similar worldview for it to work." If you don't have those two life can be and often is hell on earth! This is a really really hard thing to stick to, the common values and worldview. I can certainly understand why so many people settle for love but it doesn't turn out to be enough. What you said there about support is key. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ nivek ♦ Posted December 17, 2018 Share Posted December 17, 2018 On 11/19/2018 at 2:48 PM, Someone123 said: My ex is a Christian girl. For her God is the most important thing in her life. More important than her family, friends, boyfriend.. Really everything. S123, Note the above quote.^^^^^^ Learn It. Live it. Move ON. k,SerialR3V-Violator,FL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeverHealed52Years Posted December 17, 2018 Share Posted December 17, 2018 On 11/19/2018 at 5:19 PM, Fuego said: and serious believers really don't want anyone who doesn't echo back the same beliefs. Fear of making god angry is paramount to a believer. (When they are evangelizing, they typically emphasize love and mercy, but once you are in it becomes mostly fear of making god angry, sadness that you already did, weeping over "sins", looking for mercy again and again, followed by periods of happy and joyful, then repeat). To a serious believer, you are just a devil trying to lure them away from god. They really do see it that way. This is such a good explanation I just had to break it out from the rest of the excellent description. Since I am still deconverting I need to read and re-read this paragraph to keep reminding myself of the truth when I start to slip back into the mind F***K. Thanks Fuego. Someone123. Pay attention before you regret the mess you made of your life...by a wrong choice 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TruthSeeker0 Posted December 18, 2018 Share Posted December 18, 2018 Personally, I'd find it pretty insulting that someone who supposedly loves me also sees me as a danger to their beliefs. No self respecting person should even contemplate tolerating that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RachelSkates Posted December 19, 2018 Share Posted December 19, 2018 She is crazy. Xianity causes mental illness. Bipolar. How many xers I know who are bipolar! They want the carnal man things, but then they get all crazy because of guilt and shame and then it's you. RUN, man, RUN!! I know how feelings are. I fell in love with an Xer and AGAIN got so mentally fucked. They are crazy unless they are totally rich and comfy (Graham, Robertson). They are good because it all worked out for them. But when you get an xer and something does not work or make sense to them? OMG. NUTSO 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RealityCheck Posted December 19, 2018 Share Posted December 19, 2018 This person is showing signs or mental illness (bi-polar). The problem is, Christianity takes anyone who is prone the these conditions and makes them far worse. The form of rejection she is showing is especially despicable as she is hiding behind her god as an excuse rather then being direct. It's going to take time for your emotions to subside and you to come to terms with that. This of course will make the process of deconversion more difficult but thats what this community is for. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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