Who am I? What should I do?

[Rick124]

So I was born and raised on a Mennonite  colony of around a thousand people in mexico.  The colony was formed some 70 years ago by mennonites leaving canada so they could have private schools.  By now there are several different denominations here.  Anyway, after growing up to being a very dedicated Christian, I gradually stopped believing in Gods around two years ago.  I’m 21 now.  I feel isolated.  I still see my friends sometimes, but it’s not the same.  I barely go to any social gatherings because most of them involve church.  I don’t know who I am or what I’m interested in.  I don’t feel like anyone understands me and accepts me.  Sorry, I don’t like saying all this negative stuff, but I’d REALLY like things to change and I don’t know how to make that happen.  I could go to Canada and try to find likeminded people there, but where would I start?  Anyway, wondering if anyone can relate?

[Derek]

I'm almost 50 and still don't know "who I am"...and I'm in eastern Canada. I do know I'm not lost...and I'm definitely not christian.  I don't have a lot in common with most people around here either because of their religious brainwashing...which doesn't make the deconversion process very easy.

[TruthSeeker0]

There are in all likelihood like minded people to be found in Mexico, not only in Canada. Search for secular organizations or clubs  you could join. In Canada at least there are several to be found particularly in metropolitan areas. 

[JohnnyWishbone]

9 hours ago, Rick124 said:

So I was born and raised on a Mennonite  colony of around a thousand people in mexico.  The colony was formed some 70 years ago by mennonites leaving canada so they could have private schools.  By now there are several different denominations here.  Anyway, after growing up to being a very dedicated Christian, I gradually stopped believing in Gods around two years ago.  I’m 21 now.  I feel isolated.  I still see my friends sometimes, but it’s not the same.  I barely go to any social gatherings because most of them involve church.  I don’t know who I am or what I’m interested in.  I don’t feel like anyone understands me and accepts me.  Sorry, I don’t like saying all this negative stuff, but I’d REALLY like things to change and I don’t know how to make that happen.  I could go to Canada and try to find likeminded people there, but where would I start?  Anyway, wondering if anyone can relate?

I can relate to this, as I suffered in the same sinking boat.

 

Start by creating little circles of learning that you're comfortable with, then as you complete those circles, they will expand and encompass more things your comfortable with.

[Wertbag]

Usually you can find atheist or secular societies with a Google search with your town or province name. If you have the means then you could start such a group, website, Facebook page or forum. Universities are some of the best places to search for clubs or like minded people. 

[♦ Fuego ♦]

Now that you are not leading a pre-programmed life, life is yours to explore. What things resonate with you? What things attract you? What would you enjoy doing? What makes you recoil? Find things that you like to do, and others will likely be doing them. For me, I took dance lessons and voice lessons just for fun. I had fun and got out of the house. Now I have a circle of singer friends and we go to each others gigs at jazz clubs (not so much bars as restaurants with live music). I found a lady friend who likes to dress me more fashionably than I would have dressed myself based on my introverted upbringing. I found work with computers, and eventually with building maintenance. Not thrilling, but steady work and very practical. I learned to invest money instead of giving it away to churches and weeping missionaries. 

 

I don't really hang out with ex-Christians except on these forums, but most of those in my circle (though not all) are not believers. Most animals on Earth are concerned with eating, finding a mate, and surviving day to day. That's pretty much what humans do also, except that we add a lot of other things to our lives for education and entertainment. Some people love to wallow in politics, others would rather make a nice garden. That is why it is important to ponder what you'd really like to do. Sometimes though you have to push the boundaries of your comfort to grow. I was very shy, so getting up in front of people and singing was a big deal. Now it is second-nature. Dancing was awkward at first, but I stayed with it for a while and got better at it. 

 

You have so much life ahead of you, and so much of it depends on your own decisions now instead of trying to please a myth, and people who are controlled by the myth.