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Christopherhays

Should I go to church tomorrow?

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So I’m agnostic and I started living with my dad who’s super into Christianity (LA rent is literally impossible for me while starting a small business and my dad is “blessed” with like 8 extra bedrooms) 

 

he said he wants me to go to church tomorrow at 6:45 am 😧. We’ve talked about my Issues with church and I was hoping he’d give me my space with it. Tomorrow is my day off and I wanna sleep in and watch football... but I feel guilty so idk what to do. 

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I'll get back to you the day after tomorrow.😉

PS. Note to self: must remember to say I've been saying prayers with a friend.😮

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If you are feeling guilt, then you haven't yet communicated to him about church and religion. He of course sees his church as "different" and his god as a real living interactive being (in truth, an imaginary friend like Spiderman, made to feel more real by having a special building and a bunch of people singing and possibly raising hands.) 

 

If your staying there requires that you go (a rude arrangement), how about a late service? If you didn't agree to go, are you in danger of being kicked out? All in all, express yourself more clearly about why you don't want to participate in a service when you are not a believer. He likely hopes that magic will happen and you'll be like him. If you can convey that your unbelief doesn't make you evil or whatever he may fear, just human, then maybe he won't pressure you. 

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I would suggest you just do it. If you are agnostic, presumably you still are searching for the truth? So attending may help you to clarify your views. If you are atheist, well it doesn't mean anything, does it? So keep your father happy, keep your place at home and be happy.

I have found that I can switch off my intelligence and my discomfort in some situations. For example, I take my partner to church but don't attend the services. Also, I recently found myself saying some prayers! I have a friend who is in the last weeks of her life, dieing of cancer. She has a very strong faith and who am I to refuse when she asked me to say some prayers? It would have been unkind. And it meant nothing to me. So we are both happy. And I'm sure her god understands (!!!) 😉😮.
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Room and board isn't free. Just don't let it cost you your self respect.

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It depends on the relationship and the nature of your rent-free deal. Was it an invitation or a demand?

 

Option 1: Just pretend you're at a poorly written and produced play with bad scenery, costumes and lighting. Consider the plot to be a farce, albeit a boring one. Sometimes there are snacks  mid-way through but you might not get any. And when it's over you might get to shake hands with the director on the way out. If there is a balcony, sit up there and spend the time counting the bald heads below and the number of other hairstyles or whatever you can see.

 

Option 2: Assert yourself and tell him that, thanks but no thanks, you don't care to go. Don't get into a discussion of the reasons. Just say that you don't care to go. (Google "Assertive Rights.")

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Why does church start at 6:45 am? That's insane.

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36 minutes ago, midniterider said:

Why does church start at 6:45 am? That's insane.

 

God has things to do later in the day.

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9 minutes ago, LogicalFallacy said:

 

God has things to do later in the day.

 

Sounds like my ham radio club. 7am breakfast meetings. Fuck that.

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34 minutes ago, midniterider said:

 

Sounds like my ham radio club. 7am breakfast meetings. Fuck that.

 

You are clearly not a fisherman - we get up before the sun so we are on the water just as it becomes light enough to see :D 

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7 hours ago, midniterider said:

Why does church start at 6:45 am? That's insane.


church is 7:30 but my dad gets there for the pre service prayer meetings and stuff lol... he also stays after to talk with any ‘new believers. Between him and my mom they attend corporate church events 5 days a week 😕 

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I ended up going :(. Wasn’t fun. I was so tired I fell asleep during game lol. Idk, I’ve respectfully discussed my issues with Christianity and they admit they don’t have answers, but they still think I’m rebellious or something. I’m not going next week, have to wait and see what happens. 

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Rebellious? What are you 10? If you are 18 or older tell them to have some respect for you as an adult person who can make your own mind up and hold your own opinions and beliefs... Or lack of them in this case. You've discussed it with them respectfully. I take it you haven t said their beliefs are bat shit insane or some such? Now they can treat you with respect - it's a two way street. 

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Making someone attend church doesn't make them believe. 

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On 10/20/2019 at 3:47 AM, Christopherhays said:

So I’m agnostic and I started living with my dad who’s super into Christianity (LA rent is literally impossible for me while starting a small business and my dad is “blessed” with like 8 extra bedrooms) 

 

he said he wants me to go to church tomorrow at 6:45 am 😧. We’ve talked about my Issues with church and I was hoping he’d give me my space with it. Tomorrow is my day off and I wanna sleep in and watch football... but I feel guilty so idk what to do. 

Honestly that's a conversation you should've had with him before moving in. If you're a grown adult your dad can't influence what you do. The boundary lines with inappropriate behavior such as telling your adult children what to do, should've been established. 

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If going to church is a definite part of your rent, then you either pay the rent, or move out.  That's life.

However, if you can work out some kind of compromise, that would be great! 

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