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Update on divorce and parents


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good morning everyone,

 

Its been awhile since I gave an update about whats been going on. I know several of you have been concerned about my well being and maybe even making sure I'm staying in the right head space. Its been a Rollercoaster for sure. My wife and I will be divorced in less than two weeks. So I knew I had to tell my parents. The big question as you all know was how? All of you gave me some great advice for me to contemplate. 

 

Well this past week I went to my parents house to give them the news. It was lunch time and of course my mom was glad to see me and have lunch with me. I waited till after lunch to tell them. I decided the best course of action was to rip off the divorce band-aid first and fill in the gaps from there. I just told em "I gotta tell yall something, me and "Mrs. Bishop" are getting divorced". I told them we had grown apart over the years and that my wife felt like we were two different people now and wanted a divorce. 

 

Which as I told you guys before, wasn't enough of an explanation. My dad started asking for more details because people just don't grow apart there had to be something. I gave them a couple of the main reasons and even told them that after being dooped into believing in a cult that I lost my faith. I didn't tell them to what extent I've lost my faith so my mom saw it as an opportunity to invite me to her church. (BTW they believe their church are the only ones that will be allowed inside the holy city. All the other Christians will be in the suburbs apparently lol 😆. ) but atleast they know I've lost my faith and I'm not going to church. 

 

This seemed to satisfy my dads curiosity and we talked about the past atrocities of my former church for a few minutes. They were happy that this time I wasn't cheated on and that the divorce is being handled in an amicable manner. 

 

That was a HUGE step for me. Especially letting them know I had lost faith after having been a bishop/assistant pastor at my former church. 

 

I really thought they were going to take it all worse. But mom even reiterated how she was proud of me for being a good man, raising my kids, holding down a job, and being a good husband to my wife. All in all. So far so good. The worst part of letting everyone know is out now. Everybody else can find out on Facebook. 

 

I still have a lot of adjusting to do. I haven't actually kept up with the bills in a long time. That was mostly my wife's job except for a couple of things. So I've gotta train myself to keep up with those and rework my budget considering child support. But I'm pretty sure I can manage all that. Going to open a new account this coming week to start separating the finances and such. 

 

Thanks for listening everyone. I'll keep yall posted. 

 

Dark Bishop

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  • Moderator

Good to hear it went so well with your parents.  That’s one less thing you have to worry about!  

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The most important focus now needs to be on the kids.  It's hard being a father after a divorce when literally every custody and child support law is stacked against you.  I've been there with Redneck Jr.  You'll have to be strong for them, even when you're weak, tired, fed up.  But let them see that they are still important to you and that your love for them hasn't changed.

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22 minutes ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

The most important focus now needs to be on the kids.  It's hard being a father after a divorce when literally every custody and child support law is stacked against you.  I've been there with Redneck Jr.  You'll have to be strong for them, even when you're weak, tired, fed up.  But let them see that they are still important to you and that your love for them hasn't changed.

 

100% agree. The only minor child we have is our daughter we have together. The boys are grown up. Ones moved out and the other is about to leave for the navy in two months. Both of them seem ok with it. 

 

Our daughter on the other hand is showing signs of stress. I didn't realize it until I took the parenting course. They discussed it in that. So I've been trying to assure her that everything is going to be OK. And to reassure her we both love her. She talks about it every once in awhile. 

 

It was easier with the boys because when me and their mom divorced they were to young to remember us being together. Not so with my daughter. Its been friendly so far and I think as long as we keep it that way it will make it easier on her.

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