Mike D Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 I've read alot of posts on this site during my time here from people (ex-christians or not) who get really offended when a Christian says they will pray for you. And I totally understand, especially when in the context of a Christian judging you for being a "sinner" and all that. But for me anyway I guess I learned today that it really does depend on the context. Today I was talking to a friend of mine online, who is a Christian, and I happened to mention to him that my father is dying. He was very sympathetic, and said he would pray for us. He knows I am an atheist, and he knows I think he's an idiot for his beliefs, so of course I had to make some quip about "oh you silly god believers and your prayers". He didn't say anything after that. The more I thought about it, I kind of felt bad for saying that... this is a very good friend of mine that i've known for a long time and I know he truely feels bad for me. So what I said suddenly seemed very inappropriate and, well, belittling to him, and I shouldn't have said it. I think this is really just his way of saying "dude there is absolutely nothing I can do to help you and I can't save your dad and my prayer probably won't either, but I don't know what else to do so this is my way of saying I care about what happens to you". I think this is one of the first times not only was I not offended when someone said they would pray for me, but I was actually kind of touched by it. Anyway so I guess I posted this because sometimes I forget that Christians are people too, just like everyone else. And many of them are really good people. A little delusional maybe, but still good people. Aren't they? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhampir Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 In this situation, it is important to remember that these people honestly believe in the efficacy of prayer. Evidently, you are used to "I'll pray for you" being the snide cop-out that it is more often than not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purple Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 In this situation, it is important to remember that these people honestly believe in the efficacy of prayer. Evidently, you are used to "I'll pray for you" being the snide cop-out that it is more often than not. I agree. I am surrounded by people who believe in one form of god or another, I mean I think we all are to some extent, but my husband is a xian, and my Erus follows the old Roman gods. Sometiems "I'll pray for you" is ""wow you are an awful unbelieving person," but other times it's just saying I care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RHEMtron Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 exactly what you and the others said. last month i also found out my dad is dying. my girlfriend is xtian and she said she'd pray for me. then her mom, dad, sister, friends and fam all came up to me or called me and said they prayed for my dad. of course i dont believe in religion, but i was touched cause i saw that they really cared and were sad for me. yeah.... dont forget they are people too, and that they do care... logic is just a little misplaced. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thackerie Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 Count me in as one who truly hates it when people say they'll pray for me. Hate it! Hate it! Hate it! Unfortunately, I have to hear this a lot. I have multiple sclerosis and I walk with forearm crutches whenever I leave my house. This seems to attract strangers who have some compulsion to show off their compassion, or something. But, I realize most of them are well-meaning so I don't say what I'm really thinking but merely thank them. However, if someone told me they'd pray for me to see the light or believe in their religion or whatever, I think I'd have a few choice words to reply. Fortunately, this hasn't happened because I don't waste one second talking to fundies. Life is too short to be bothered by that ilk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LosingMyReligion Posted May 5, 2006 Share Posted May 5, 2006 It all depends upon the context. I still pray, just not to the judeo christian god. However, I don't get offended when they say "I'll pray for you" if my mother is sick, or my pet died, or something. But when it comes down to them praying for me due to my sexual preference or any perceived "evil" that I am committing then that pisses me of. It is so self righteous and indignant. It's basically them looking down on you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike D Posted May 6, 2006 Author Share Posted May 6, 2006 last month i also found out my dad is dying. My sympathies RHEMtron. My dad has prostate cancer, but it has spread all over the place so there's nothing they can do. Well I guess Jesus could do something if he felt like it, but he won't because he still doesn't exist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike D Posted May 6, 2006 Author Share Posted May 6, 2006 Unfortunately, I have to hear this a lot. I have multiple sclerosis and I walk with forearm crutches whenever I leave my house. This seems to attract strangers who have some compulsion to show off their compassion, or something. But, I realize most of them are well-meaning so I don't say what I'm really thinking but merely thank them. Wow that's tough and I am sorry you have to go through that. And you make a good point I had never considered before.... for a person who has a physical condition of some sort that is obvious to Christians (or any religious people I suppose), I imagine they get prayed for a lot. But does ever do anything, like actually cure their condition? Do they think that god just doesn't hear prayers, or do they take it personally that he's not healing them, or do they finally just figure out he probably isn't there in the first place and that's why nothing happens? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Sage Nabooru Posted May 7, 2006 Share Posted May 7, 2006 It all depends upon the context. I still pray, just not to the judeo christian god. However, I don't get offended when they say "I'll pray for you" if my mother is sick, or my pet died, or something. But when it comes down to them praying for me due to my sexual preference or any perceived "evil" that I am committing then that pisses me of. It is so self righteous and indignant. It's basically them looking down on you. I'm in exactly the same position. I pray to God, just not the Christian God. I do not believe the Christo-Islamic-Judeo God exists. (This is often a source of confusion in America and I imagine Europe, where saying "I believe in God" or "I pray to God" brings about an automatic assumption that you are speaking of the Christian God, and not just Godhead in general.) I find it touching as much as anyone else does, when I'm sick or someone I'm close to is, when I'm told "I'll pray for you". Not even that but even if I'm hoping to get a job someplace or going away on a trip - it's a way of saying "I wish you the best of luck" and "I'll be thinking of you". The only thing I wouldn't like in the area of offered prayers are, "I'll pray for you to see the light". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted May 7, 2006 Share Posted May 7, 2006 I'm in exactly the same position. I pray to God, just not the Christian God. I do not believe the Christo-Islamic-Judeo God exists. (This is often a source of confusion in America and I imagine Europe, where saying "I believe in God" or "I pray to God" brings about an automatic assumption that you are speaking of the Christian God, and not just Godhead in general.) I find it touching as much as anyone else does, when I'm sick or someone I'm close to is, when I'm told "I'll pray for you". Not even that but even if I'm hoping to get a job someplace or going away on a trip - it's a way of saying "I wish you the best of luck" and "I'll be thinking of you". The only thing I wouldn't like in the area of offered prayers are, "I'll pray for you to see the light". Yes; it annoys the hell out of me when people always think that "God" means the Abrahamic god. Of course, this is to be expected, since Western civilization is so thoroughly saturated in the swill of Xianity, but it's still frustrating, much like when someone equates "religion" with the Abrahamic cults, especially Xianity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts