My turn to Atheism *repost*

[Brutal Brian]

Well I have reposted this because I can see some new people and I am relatively new myself so here goes....

 

Hi there, everyone! I just found this site this afternoon via a link from the Biblical Nonsense site, and I just want to get this out of the way first, I am glad to find a venue where I can vent and speak and people actually AGREE with me. What a great place! I don't know how many times I will have something really valid to contribute, but I will make do. I have signed up for both forums under the same name to avoid any confusion.

 

My name is Brian, my nickname comes from my on-air radio DJ name at the college station I host a heavy metal program at. I am 24 years old.

 

So now to get to the reason why I have become/how I got to being an Atheist.

 

I was born into a Lutheran family in Southeast Michigan where I currently live. Was an only child at first and I became a brother at 8 years of age. Anyway, I was made to go to Church every other Sunday or so, and I had to attend Sunday School before the Service, 9:15 AM and 10:30 AM respectively, and I learned all the stories they like to teach children to get them hooked. Noah, Cain, Abel, Adam, Eve, and all the bunch became familiar to me over the course of my early childhood years into my preteens. I also had to attend VBS, Vacation Bible School, all the Summers as well, and we always went to Church on X-Mas. Eventually I came to the point where I would get these ideas in my head, How was god Created, Why did his people kill Jesus, etc. I was very afraid to bring this up with my parents, as I was afraid I would be punished, so I did the next best thing, I asked my Sunday School teacher. We got into a very long discussion that must have lasted two hours and I had a very disturbed Sunday School teacher and I went home with my questions still unanswered. I would read the Bible and pray and expect a voice or a sign that my questions would be answered, but I was getting nothing.

 

So I went on for 3 years like this and then I read some parts of the New Testament I had never read before and worked my way to Revelations. I finished reading Revelations and I was horrified. An all loving merciful Creator would do this to his people? I couldn't believe it. I became very afraid and prayed for my Salvation everyday, as if God COULD and WOULD do this, I wanted to make sure I was going to be saved. I would do this till 15 all the while I was going into High School Years I was struggling against my hormones and my budding interests in girls and I was latching onto Heavy Metal music as well which was not good for me apparently because it was the "Devil's Music" and as a Christian, I wasn't supposed to listen to it.

 

So for the next two years, going into High School, I struggled to cling to my Christian beliefs my family had instilled in me and what I was feeling turning into an adult. Well eventually I was tired of praying and not seeing any results. So I was losing faith in my religion and giving into Rock and Roll and Heavy Metal. And I researched and looked into other religions in an attempt to console myself and tell myself that there was a God, but he was either two or many, I researched Satanism, Buddhism, Odinism, Paganism, and more. I tried to be Pagan for a while, and a Satanist for a while , but eventually as I graduated High School I decided that I couldn't find any beliefs suited to me and that I really didn't thunk there was something else out there. So I decided on being an Atheist, and it felt like a weight was lifted of my shoulders, and I felt much better. I could sleep at night and didn't have a guilty conscience anymore. I was now 18 and out of High School. I told my parents I had something to tell them, and they thought I was going to say I was gay or something, but I told them I was an Atheist, they looked at me in shock. I think they would have much rather heard me say I was gay, they didn't take this well at all. They especially didn't like it when I taught my brother to think for himself and exposed him to the things I was into, now he thinks for himself, and is his own individual.

 

So time has passed, I have long since been out of my Parents house, my relationship with them is much better, probably the best it has been in a long time. My brother and I get along splendidly, but I still have to play Good little Christian boy for the rest of the family, as they help me out with bills and that when I need it. But otherwise I am me, who is not in the least a religious person of any sort and with all that has gone on since G.W. Bush became president, whom I DID NOT vote for, my being an Atheist is cemented in stone. And I believe a damn good majority of Christians are cultists, who are so blinded with faith they can't see straight. I tend to agree alot with most of the view of people who follow Odinism and Paganism in regard to Christianity, like the Inquisition and the Crusades, so that is where the Pagan and Viking Tendencies in my handle comes from, but I still don't believe in anything so, that is how I am an Atheist. To quote my Vehemence Tshirt, I am my own Savior.