Guest etoileterre Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 Why do I hate church? It's not necessarily because I'm pagan. It's not even because it's boring. Nor is it because I have to get up early. It's because every week, without fail, my dad has a bitchfit about how we're going to be late. Again. It's actually a lot like a drama. Here, I'll set it up for you. [sCENE I: A Sunday morning in a suburbian household. OLDER SISTER (played by Jessica G.), sits at the kitchen table eating toast, dressed neatly. BROTHER (played by Joey G.) is in his bedroom, presumably getting ready for church. YOUNGER SISTER (played by Deanna G.) and MOM (Angie G.) are also in their respective rooms. DAD (played by Joe G.), a short, dark, balding man in his early forties,also dressed neatly, almost rushes down the stairs.] OLDER SISTER: [Nonchalantly.] Beautiful day, isn't it Dad? DAD: [Distracted, looking at watch as he comes into the kitchen.] Uhuh. MOM: [Coming down the stairs] Have you eaten breakfast? BROTHER: [Throws open door] Mom, where are my Converse? MOM: Wear your sandals with those pants. BROTHER: But they look stupid with those! DAD: Church starts at 10.15, so we need to leave by 9.55. Hurry up! OLDER SISTER: [Aside] And so it commences.... DAD: It's 9.35, Deanna, get down here! YOUNGER SISTER: [From behind closed door.] I'm almost done! DAD: [Frustrated sigh.] We're going to be late, again. OLDER SISTER: [Aside] Well, it being a Catholic mass, we've already seen it several hundred times, so we know how it's going to end. And technically we're going to be on time since we've been ten minutes late every week since we started going to this church eight years ago. DAD: DEANNA, IT'S 9.45!. YOUNGER SISTER: I'M COMING! [Comes down the stairs, carrying some things. Reaches into cabinet.] Jess, could you help me? DAD: NO, we're going to be LATE. YOUNGER SISTER: I just wanted to get some food! DAD: Well, you CAN'T. YOUNGER SISTER: I was going to eat in the car! My hands are full! MOM: Jess, help your sister. OLDER SISTER: ... DAD: We're already THREE MINUTES LATE. MOM: Oh, for God's sake, Joe! You're SO NIT-PICKY! DAD: All I ask is for everyone to be ready on time! OLDER SISTER: [Aside] Maybe it's because you're the only one who wants to go.... [still screaming at each other, MOM and DAD get into the car. The children follow cautiously.] DAD: I'm just sick of being late every week! We're just bad Catholics. MOM: Well, I don't think God cares that we're late, as long as we're together as a family! OLDER SISTER: [Aside.] Uhh...how does sitting in silence for an hour constitute family time? [Less than a half-mile away from home, MOM and DAD are still screaming at each other. Finally, DAD violently pulls into a parking lot and gets out and slams the door, walking home. The rest of the family commences to church. When they get there, the door is jammed shut.] That's how it goes every Sunday. It pisses me off to no end. And without making this look like a case of More-Persecuted-Than-Thou Syndrome, I can't say anything because if I do, it's because I hate God and Jesus since I'm the representative heathen of the family. Seriously. I get dressed extra nice and get downstairs extra early so I won't be the scapegoat. Then my sister gets all the shit dumped on her because she's at the age where she's changing and thus needs to be yelled at even more to prevent her from rebelling, which is exactly what my dad did to me at that age. I recognize what he's doing and try to stick up for my sister, but then I get screamed at, and again, it's because I'm the pagan. (Unfortunately?) I'm learning to just keep my mouth shut whenever my parents start picking on me or my sister. I have to keep telling myself to not feed the fire, because when I retaliate it only keeps them going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clearview Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 The repetetive scene in my family was of my dad getting in the car (how I miss that old brown station wagon with holes rusted through the floor!) and us 6 kids piling in and waiting for Mom. She was usually painting her nails or doing some useless last-minute thing-- starting it when she was already late. It's funny to think about it now, but I think she managed to piss off everyone in the family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kurari Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 The repetetive scene in my family was of my dad getting in the car (how I miss that old brown station wagon with holes rusted through the floor!) and us 6 kids piling in and waiting for Mom. She was usually painting her nails or doing some useless last-minute thing-- starting it when she was already late. It's funny to think about it now, but I think she managed to piss off everyone in the family. My family didn't attend church, but this exactly the way it was with EVERY family event. My mother was always the slowest one by doing completely meaningless stuff. If we wanted an 8am start on leaving for a vacation or anything, we wouldn't get out of there until 1pm just because of her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
08 hawk Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 I have never gone to church regularly but I've had to go with some of my family members a number of times. I found it to be boring, for one thing. And from what I can tell, churches often preach hate: "Homosexuality is an abomination to God!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nicoleeann Posted June 6, 2006 Share Posted June 6, 2006 i used to like going to church-because there were so many hot boys!!! anyone else used to crush on your youth leader?hehe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hickory Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Older sister, Every sunday? Sounds like your dad has found a way of getting out of going to mass! Well I am a forty-something catholic dad and we used to have similar problems on Sunday morning. I feel for you. It shouldn't be that way going to church. Now if we're too late we just don't go. Makes for much more peace and serenity in the family. Just know life does get better! ol' hickory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted June 7, 2006 Share Posted June 7, 2006 Thankfully, I never really had that problem. My church was only five minutes' walk from home, so it was just a matter of walking out the front door. But I've heard the horror stories from people about Sunday mornings like this. It's all driven by the need to not be late for Baby Jeezus as well as the fact that missing Mass is a mortal sin in the Church, so all that added pressure makes for crazy mornings. The unnatural demands of Xianity, the Catholic sect or any other, just don't work in the modern world. No one has time or energy to live up to that crap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest revpo Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 Wow I liked that story, church going, I would say many have experienced that. You have seen the church ritual thousands of times, same old thing, nothing new., and remember if you don't go you will burn..and more lies. Its a social event dress up for the community of believers, who can be talked about, etc. what a boaring time. You either go on saturday or sunday, be sure to pray to one who never answers, read the scripture and live in FEAR if you screw up. No wonder the church has a declining membership, and look out for your brother the priest could be lying in wait, since no marriage is allowed with the clergy, just entertaining little kids. Don't worry it will be covered up to get promoted. What a mess it is., don't blame you for not wanting to go...use logic and reason and you will be ok... revpo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Young Mother Atheist Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 This was an excellent story and yet sad it's true. I had similar experience with this and my family because my dad is a freak about being on time and my mom could care less. It is ironic to me looking back at it that Sundays were supposed to be this day for God, and yet Sundays were the worst days for my family. There was almost always a fight about something trivial, and I also always felt tired and sick because church lasted so long. The day that was supposed to bring people together as a family divided us more than any other day by having church. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jedah Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 The thing I hated most about church was how people would swallow up anything the preacher told them without thinking for a minute about if he was actually saying anything logically sound. One time I went to a saturday night church meeting with my parents, and the pastor starting preaching some apologetics. And not just any apologetics...really really BAD apologetics. Were talking remove-brain-from-skull-relocate-in-anus-then-stuff-2000- marshmallows-in-your-ears bad. This was classic "we know atheism is wrong because God tells us he exists in the bible" circular crap. When the priest got to deism his answer was "Well obviously God has revealed himself ! It says so in the bible !" Basically it was stereotypical "Bible wins because bible wins" stuff and yet no one in the church managed to notice this through the entire 2 hour long service as he "debunked" ever other religion using the same "BIBLE SAYS OTHERWISE" format. I was almost dying near the end because part of me just wanted to burst out laughing and another side just wanted to leave in disgust. My dad actually works for intel, and is a pretty smart guy. He isnt alone either. But when it comes to church it sometimes seems like everyone just suddenly takes the logical part of their brain and sets it aside as if they never even had it in them. /rant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manta Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 It's called compartmentalising your knowledge. People are usually sensible beings until they enter a church or enter a religious discussion, wherein its "Parrot what you've been taught" or "Shut up, listen and obey". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest etoileterre Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 It's called compartmentalising your knowledge. People are usually sensible beings until they enter a church or enter a religious discussion, wherein its "Parrot what you've been taught" or "Shut up, listen and obey". Hee hee, you know the ironic thing about all this? The week I posted this was Pentecost. You know, the day in which the Holy Spirit came down in tongues of flame and gave the disciples the power to speak every language. And the priest said, "This is the day in which fire came down in tongues of flame..." I started laughing, and my mom's like, "Huh?" XD Goes to show you that no one really DOES listen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asimov Posted June 10, 2006 Share Posted June 10, 2006 I could stand going to church....but I'd be cringing internally from all the bullshit that's being sent my way. It's like being bombarded with radiation. It sounds like your Sunday is something out of a sitcom, etoileterre. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest etoileterre Posted June 11, 2006 Share Posted June 11, 2006 I could stand going to church....but I'd be cringing internally from all the bullshit that's being sent my way. It's like being bombarded with radiation. It sounds like your Sunday is something out of a sitcom, etoileterre. Funny, my mom always talks about making our family life into a sitcom. I never thought it would sell, but maybe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts