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And I'm The Normal One?!


Kurari
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This is a story I think you can all appreciate. It happened a while ago, but I have to share.

 

My parents have been divorced since I was ten years old and my father and stepmother live in California. Earlier this year, my father contacted me again after deciding for around nine months or so not to answer my e-mails or telephone calls. He just "never got around to it," yet he's always the first to bitch when I stop writing to him. That's a rant in of itself, but one for later.

 

So he calls me one day out of the blue and leaves a message for me to call him back, and that was it. Then my mother e-mailed me and wrote "I spoke to your father earlier. When it was all sorted, it appears your stepmother read some article about a cult near us. Your brother had told him you'd moved, so a hmm, she's moved so 2 + 2 = 5, right? So I reassured them both you're not quirky like THAT."

 

At the time, there was a Catholic based sex cult in my area that got busted up. There was also a lot of "partner swapping" going on. All the men lived together in one place and all the women lived together in another, and they traded off on partners. What brought in the cops was they were taking away young children from their parents and then using them for sex. Really sick story.

 

I had moved across town around the same time and even though I had sent him a note with my new address and things telling him where I went, I think he ignored it. Still, I didn't quite understand the connection of all this, so I wrote my mom and said, "What? Do they think I joined a sex cult or something?"

 

And my mom wrote back saying: "Looks like the conclusion they jumped to--you've moved and there's a sex cult in the area so they were anxious. Finally got on to check on you, what a compliment, right?"

 

:twitch:

 

I think my family starts out their days eating great big bowls of WTF?! for breakfast.

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:lmao:

 

That's a funny story, though not funny for you. Parents are weird, they really are. I try to just ignore mine when they get all weird. You seem to be a smart person so you'd think your own folks would give you a little credit.

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:lmao:

 

That's a funny story, though not funny for you. Parents are weird, they really are. I try to just ignore mine when they get all weird. You seem to be a smart person so you'd think your own folks would give you a little credit.

 

 

Oh, I found it quite hysterical. My mother was pissed as all hell for his stupid assumption, and I probably should have been, but it was too stupid to be offensive.

 

My family got me into more bizarre situations regarding religion than just being involved did. Once when I was still a christian, one Christmas Eve I went to help my church with set up for the evening service. My job was to prepare the IllumiNARI, which for anyone who doesn't know, are lighted candles that are placed along the path leading to the entrance of the church to illuminate the way.

 

My mother, who can't get anything I say straight, wrote my very conservative fundamentalist Presbyterian grandmother and told her I was setting up the IlluminNATI.

 

Now THAT was an interesting one to explain. But damn...I have to admit it DID make me sound cool. :lmao:

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