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Goodbye Jesus

Phrases That Make You Sick


garrisonjj

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"America Bless God!" Translation: Who cares if 88% of Americans believe in God...we want to use the other 12% as an excuse to claim that this country isn't moral or Christian enough.

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The phrases I hate are:

I missed my period.

Open the door, it's the police.

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Okay I was just reminded of a pharse I hated because my sons band is having a pot luck. As a fundie nothing could be about luck, heaven forbid, so, thye had pot faiths. :twitch: I hated that one even when I was a fundie asshole, it is so "I'm so much better than "the world"." :woopsie:

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Another I was just reminded of today:

 

"I'm babysitting my kids." No, no you're not. If they're your own children then by definition you're not "babysitting". You're parenting. Saying that you're babysitting implies that it's not actually your job, and you're doing the other parent a favor by taking over the childcare for a short time. Taking care of your children is, in fact, your job. That's why it's not called babysitting.

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Okay I was just reminded of a pharse I hated because my sons band is having a pot luck. As a fundie nothing could be about luck, heaven forbid, so, thye had pot faiths. :twitch: I hated that one even when I was a fundie asshole, it is so "I'm so much better than "the world"." :woopsie:

 

That's exactly the kind of thing I was talking about. Holyspeak. Ugh. :repuke:

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Today I seen a sticker on the back of a pickup truck. It said (ONLY GAWD CAN JUDGE ME).

 

Like I don't have my own opinion and I have got some pretty fucked up opinions about asshole like him :wicked:

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anything remotely christian

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I hate "God Bless America" as well. Just seeing it on some conservative Bush-fellating half-brained fundie's bumper sticker makes me sick. Never has one phrase been so thoroughly swallowed and taken up as a mantra as "God Bless America" by the Patriot Christian Reconstructionists.

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I hate "In the Year of Our Lord."

 

It's on my marriage license...issued by THE STATE. It makes me angry every time I look at it and no one thinks there's anything wrong with it.

 

And "God Bless America." What they leave off?? "And Fuck Everyone Else."

 

I mean, if you're going to say it, say it.

 

edited for drunk spelling

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"In the Year of Our Lord" sometimes gets to me, but I kinda view it like "Oh my God".....a phrase often used but very rarely literally.

 

Of course there's the "Common Era" thing they're pushing now, which I prefer, since it's wholly secular and can apply to any number of different regions with their respective calendars (Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Chinese, Japanese, etc.), the only thing that bothers me is the name. What the fuck is the "Common Era"? Is it the one that happens most often or the one that isn't of noble birth or something?

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It's funny, I was called an antipatriotic bigot because I condemned the phrase "God bless America..."

 

I'm thinking, "There are a gazillion other countries in the world that need "blessings" more than America..."

 

Why does god need to bless America? Morbid obesity is rampant, everyone has an SUV, and we get to serve our invisible diety...What more do you fundie freaks want?

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Basically, anything that comes outta my parents' mouths is enough to make me sick. Especially when they invite me to family events, or tell me that they "love" me (bullshit!). Can't stand their fucking attempts to keep contact with me.

You don't believe your parents love you? How come? Why has your relationship with the parents broken down?

 

THIS kind of thing makes me SICK!!!! As if I couldn't tell it's a fundy speaking before I scrolled down the page, in huge letters just below this sick message it says: "I'm a God warrior." UGH!!!

 

It takes a CHRISTIAN to question whether the feelings you are feeling right now are real. But it's only asked when said feelings don't match with the prescribed feelings for the situation. UGH!!!!

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Well, I have to admit, he doesn't seem to supply much of a reason for hating his parents.

 

I hate the guts out of my father, but everyone here pretty much knows why. I'm not the kind of person that thinks that a blood and genes relationship automatically confers unconditional love, but it would be nice to have some background.

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  • 4 months later...

"She’s in a better place now" How can death be better then life?

 

"God Bless You" And what if I don't want him to?

 

"Just Have Faith" I don't consider faith a virtue

 

"I’ll Pray For You" This is just a condensing way of dismissal

 

"Jesus Loves You" This is like saying Donald Duck Loves You.

 

"Jesus died for you" Well I didn't ask him too! Christian often try to use this to put someone on a guilt trip

 

"You’ll Come Back To Jesus' Over my dead body

 

"God has a plan for you" I get so sick of hearing this one. I make my own plans in life.

 

"It’s your destiny" Similar to the above. Hey, I make my own destiny

 

"If you left Christianity, you weren’t really a Christian" You don't know who you are talking to.

 

"Why are you so angry with god?" How can I be angry with something that doesn't exist?

 

"Why do you hate Jesus" How can I hate someone that doesn't exist?

 

"Evolution is just a theory" Really people who say this really ought to look up what a scientific theory is before they say this. Gravity is a theory too.

 

"You’ll get married again" Did you ever consider the possibility that I do not want to get married again?

 

"Jesus filled the hole inside me" Maybe I just have a sick mind, but when I hear this I can't help but think of sex. :grin:

 

"Washed in the blood of the lamb." Now that's just gross, makes me think of Mayan human sacrifices, etc...

 

"No Jesus, No Peace. Know Jesus, Know Peace" Just stupid

 

So called non-offensive versions of cuss words, like gosh darnit. I’d much rather hear the real thing goddamn it!

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Wow Scarlett that was quite a rant.

 

I hate, "How is your spiritual walk?"

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I hate offspring related conversation.

 

I've travelled the world. I put myself through college without incurring any debt. I attended SpaceCamp as a kid and even got an award. I'm gainfully employed and financially independant.....

 

Does anyone want to hear about any of that?

 

Noooooo.

 

Whenuryougonnahavekids? Howmanyyougonnahave? Havingchildrenisthemostamazingexperienceintheworld.........

 

blah blah blah ad nauseum.

 

It's amazing, I turn 30 and everyone (except for my own parents thankfully...and my closest friends) is in sudden panic for me to start shooting spawn like a damn salad-shooter out of my uterus. For years they said "you'll change your mind when you get older." Well I think it's beginning to dawn on some of them that I'm older, and the push to get me to join the Church of Childrunn has been stepped up a couple notches.

 

It's not that there's anything...wrong with having kids. But what is that weird smile and glow in these people's eyes? And all the nodding heads that all agree that breeding is the best thing ever? Everyone agrees that kids are great?

 

Gives me the same prickly feel on the back on my neck as when those other people would smile at me and hand me free literature. I feel like someone is trying to convince me of something they believe in, but isn't necessarily true.

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But White Raven having children may be part of your spiritual walk. :shrug::HaHa:

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"She’s in a better place now" How can death be better then life?

 

"God Bless You" And what if I don't want him to?

 

"Just Have Faith" I don't consider faith a virtue

 

"I’ll Pray For You" This is just a condensing way of dismissal

 

"Jesus Loves You" This is like saying Donald Duck Loves You.

 

"Jesus died for you" Well I didn't ask him too! Christian often try to use this to put someone on a guilt trip

 

"You’ll Come Back To Jesus' Over my dead body

 

"God has a plan for you" I get so sick of hearing this one. I make my own plans in life.

 

"It’s your destiny" Similar to the above. Hey, I make my own destiny

 

"If you left Christianity, you weren’t really a Christian" You don't know who you are talking to.

 

"Why are you so angry with god?" How can I be angry with something that doesn't exist?

 

"Why do you hate Jesus" How can I hate someone that doesn't exist?

 

"Evolution is just a theory" Really people who say this really ought to look up what a scientific theory is before they say this. Gravity is a theory too.

 

"You’ll get married again" Did you ever consider the possibility that I do not want to get married again?

 

"Jesus filled the hole inside me" Maybe I just have a sick mind, but when I hear this I can't help but think of sex. :grin:

 

"Washed in the blood of the lamb." Now that's just gross, makes me think of Mayan human sacrifices, etc...

 

"No Jesus, No Peace. Know Jesus, Know Peace" Just stupid

 

So called non-offensive versions of cuss words, like gosh darnit. I’d much rather hear the real thing goddamn it!

 

JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZUSHCHRIST! Scarlett! Thats a great list. Blesed are they who fear the lard! Fuck!!!

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"Religion of peace". I most often hear it used by fundy Muslims but now it's gaining ground in fundy Christian circles. Surprisingly few Buddhists, Taoists, etc. feel the need to apply it to their religion, I guess because they don't feel the need to argue it.

 

"Islam is a religion of peace! Just as soon as you submit to our God's will and agree to live as second-class citizens at the mercy of our religious leaders."

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The other day I was standing at the bus stop in a bad mood, and this guy walks by and says:

 

Guy: How are you doing sister?

 

Me: I'm fine.

 

Guy: I didn't ask you how you looked. You're supposed to say I'm blessed.

 

...

 

wtf?!? I should have told him to fuck off since I was in a bad mood anyway and he put me in an even worse mood.

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God is all knowing, yeah that phrase pisses me off.

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"I'm blessed!" was the standard answer you were supposed to say when asked "how are you doing?" If you didn't say this then it was thought that you must not be strong in faith. Even if we were in pain we were suppose to speak those words to make the faith we speak come into existence. Doesn't that sound silly now? But at the time I was scared to ever say a negative word.

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I hate it when Christians say "God only gives you what you need not what you want." when you are actually praying hard as you are in dire need of basic necessities such as housing, jobs, and food. On the other hand these assholes are always the ones who you hear praying for something they want such as a Mercedes Beinz. In the last church I went to the pastor would say that fucking phrase anytime someone in the congregation would loose thier home and/or job while he was praising Jeebus about getting a new motorcycle. :vent:

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We lived in VA for a while and all the xtians there liked to say "Bless your heart" when really they were thinking "OMG!! What the hell is wrong with you people"!!

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