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Goodbye Jesus

An Anonymous Deconversion

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Spring is Coming



Spring is coming, and the weather was so warm this evening. 

I had the opportunity to go play card games with some co-workers, but I passed as I was tired from two long days of work. And I wanted to come home and enjoy peaceful time outside, enjoying the above-60 degree weather. 

I weight lifted, which I've been doing consistently the last year or so. 

I went on a long walk with my boyfriend, enjoying the outdoorsy, open areas near our place. 

And then I did some yoga. 


I did a yoga class back in high school for a year, so I have familiar with the various poses and such. I can't recall what compelled me this past weekend, but I thought - why not try to get back into yoga? To try and train myself to find inner peace, to love myself, to build up my core and body strength? To connect mind and body? 


Mind you - I'm not spiritual at all. Not one bit. Since losing Christianity, I've lost belief in god altogether and also the belief of a soul. This hasn't really helped in my search for finding "purpose" in life. If you're a fellow ex-Christian, then you probably know what I mean, the difficulty in finding purpose again. 


But this yoga thing. I discovered this Youtube poster who's a yoga instructor, and I'm not sure, but the way she talks you through the exercises and workouts, she's motivated me to keep up with this new yoga habit I've started. And interestingly enough I have found my moods lifting since. 

And my abs quite sore. 


More updates on this to come. 


-B. (AnonAgno94)


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I personally had no trouble with the "purpose" thing when I deconverted. I still have a job, I'm still married, I still have things to do and reasons to do them, so the fact that I now realize there are no such things as gods and that I'm not beholden to ones called Jehovah and Jesus didn't take away from my day-to-day responsibilities. And to me, those things are my "purpose."


I guess it never got drummed into me that I was supposed to have some sort of externally given purpose. I'm glad I never learned that, because I don't have to deal with that sense of loss! I actually gained some purpose, because I now feel like it's important to make life as pleasant as possible for myself and the people around me. Not that I think I'm responsible for other people's happiness, just that I should be the kind of person that takes other people's happiness into consideration when possible or reasonable.

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I may look into the Yoga thing. Thanks for explaining how you've been finding your way in that. I'd be interested in the Youtube channel (if you happen to see my comment!)


I also am at the point of feeling that the soul is a made up invention of man. I don't have any spiritual desire at all. I may grow out of that with time, and maybe find something, but who knows.


I'll tell you one benefit that I immediately had -- enjoying each day and appreciating those around me. I'm much more in the moment, probably because I now realize this life is all I get. And weirdly, I don't see that as a bad thing -- rather -- it's freeing!

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15 hours ago, Riven said:

I don't see that as a bad thing -- rather -- it's freeing!

I feel the same way. It is very freeing to just be a part of nature. Roll with the rhythm and cycle of life.

I enjoy yoga. It is hugely beneficial to mind and body. I don't attach any woo or spirituality to it. I don't 

get into the Hindu or Chinese Zen philosophy or practice behind it.

I do ascribe to Jon Kabat Zinn's philosophy of Mindfulness - defined as paying attention on purpose, with non-judgement

being present in the "now" of living. His philosophy is based on Zen Buddhism, but you're not required to be a Buddhist

to take the teachings on board. For me it's a wonderful way to live in the present moment - not the past, nor the future but the present.

Check out Jon Kabat Zinn's Mindfulness for Beginners on Amazon. Yoga is one of the meditation practices. Christians are usually so spooked by

the mention of yoga when they know absolutely nothing about it and make up stories about it to keep other Christians away from it.

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@JenniferG thank you! I just looked him up on Youtube! This sounds like it would be perfect for where I am right now.

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