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Shared My Deconverstion With A Friend From College


mick
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He says he wants to talk more about it though. If you were right at the beginning of trying to show a fundsmentalist who seems somewhat open what would you do first? I have a million things I have been battling strangers on the internet with, but mostly it's like a war.

 

This is somone who knows me and respects me. Is there a resource, or an article that would good for him to read first that anhy of you know. I could right something up, but I'm wondering if you all have any suggestions.

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Mick..fundamentalists are not generally open..that's why they are called fundamentalists.

 

Just a question: Do you want information to share where you stand, or to deconvert your friend?

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Both.

 

I think he is someone who is open, and kind of has some struggles with issues already. He has little children that have not been brainwashed yet, so I am kind of thinking of them at this point.

 

Mick..fundamentalists are not generally open..that's why they are called fundamentalists.

 

Just a question: Do you want information to share where you stand, or to deconvert your friend?

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I've often thought about what I would do. So far I've only told my husband (who doesn't know what he believes) and my brother (not a practicing Christian but hasn't denied it either) and my cousin (a pagan/atheist maybe). I tend to go into too much detail--dumping information that I've gleaned over several months of reading. It blows them away and they just worry about you. So in the future, I've decided the better course of action would be to keep it simple as to why I came to my decision. I haven't yet told any of my xtian friends or family so I don't really know how that would go. I don't think you can deconvert anyone who isn't already on that path. The website I really liked was 'Questioning--An Examination of Christian Belief'--but even that had some stuff that was hard to take at first.

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He says he wants to talk more about it though. If you were right at the beginning of trying to show a fundsmentalist who seems somewhat open what would you do first? I have a million things I have been battling strangers on the internet with, but mostly it's like a war.

 

This is somone who knows me and respects me. Is there a resource, or an article that would good for him to read first that anhy of you know. I could right something up, but I'm wondering if you all have any suggestions.

 

I would wait for him to bring it up again, and go from there. Be respectful, act like what you believe is the most normal thing in the world (because it's totally alien to a fundy), and definately don't go into it with the hope of deconverting someone.

 

I'm sure people have more ideas on articles that would be good for you than I do, but I usually like to debate on my own because people don't often take the time to read any materials I present. They'd rather talk one on one, but it's up to you to judge whether he'd take printouts or links or not.

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I have a friend who is here all the time who is a fundy. He likes to watch what I am reading and writing sometimes. We have respect for each others opinions but sometimes we do get into little debates about religious issues. I can't change his mind and he can't change mine. So we just have to accept each other for who we are.

 

I have to agree with Kurari. Just let your friend start the conversation and go from there. Be sure to keep a level head(Do not lose your temper)This is hard for me sometimes but I am getting better at it))

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Mick,

 

Suggesting he visit this site and read the testamonies is a great idea.

 

Time after time, people here say it is a tonic to see that others go through the same things as someone else.

 

Good Luck

 

Mongo

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Ooh. I'd be careful. If I might serve as the voice of paranoia, I've discovered that fundamentalists who "seem open" are really only interested in learning about your story so they can find holes in it to hook you back into the meme. I am not optimistic that conversation with a fundamentalist about one's deconversion will lead to anything but frustration.

 

Fundamentalism: you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. You must be cautious.

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I, too, have learned that Christians who seem open and willing to talk only want to reconvert you. I have to echo the "be careful" sentiment.

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