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Feeling A Little Sad, Dissapointed In God


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So I decided to start reading the OT, over the weekend and today is a snow day and I am very bored running out of things to do. I am in Exodus right now and the more I read the more I become sad I become. Okay a bit pissed of and angry too at this god for killing everyone, but mostly sad that the god I had been taught to believe in is not the god of the bible. Yes I have given up on xianity but had somehow hoped to maybe hold on to the belief or possibility that there might be a loving god out there somewhere?

 

Who knows maybe there is a god out there that is loving but he's not the one that we were all taught to believe in.

 

Why does this make me sad? I don't know maybe it is like finding out that santa and the easter bunny aren't real and we were lied to by our parents and society. The only difference is that they really do believe or believe some form of watered down xianity. Luckily I live in a community where most people think xianity is a bunch of crap anyhow...but believe in god or a higher power or somesort of secular religion..

 

HHhhmm see what happens when you stop fellowshiping with believers and stop believing and then questioning the word of god and then questioning god ultimatly. :twitch:

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the more I read the more I become sad

 

So get yourself a copy of Lord of The Rings. It has the same supernatural heroes, magnificent beasts and a dark lord to defeat. It's actually far more believable than anything in the "bible" and it will not leave you feeling sad or depressed.

 

I equate the "bible" with Lord of The Rings, except that it didn't have a good editor, and the miracles of "Jesus" pale in comparison to the powers of Gandalf the Great.

 

Seriosly, anyone who reads the "bible" through and truly CONTEMPLATES what is written there, will surely feel that way. It is depressing and sick.

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It's been said so many times, the best way to become an ex-christian is to read and study the bible. Reading it from the viewpoint of literature or folk history instead of the "inerrant word of a divine god" will surely open the reader's eyes.

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I remember the first time I read CWG, I recommended it to my mother. She reluctantly took it on a short trip, but brought it back unread. Then I read Thich Nhat Hanh and that she didn't even bother taking.

 

I know why. It's because she's afraid (or perhaps even certain) that it will make complete and total sense, or at least more sense than her neurotic Bible-God and religion, and thus shake her faith in her dogmatic and really quite hurtful religious beliefs.

 

My mother does LCMS devotions every night, and she reads a Psalm passage and NT passage each evening. Of course the LCMS, intending that this booklet of devotions be used by the laity, carefully picks out only those passages that don't mention wholesale slaughter of innocents, OT prophets and figures who get drunk, bang their own daughters, jack off and sleep with prositutes, letters in which Paul emphasizes the inherent stupidity and sinfulness and evil of women, etc. Again, I think she knows those passages exist but refuses to read them because she knows they'll hurt her precious faith.

 

I think it's really sad when a person delibrately and consciously keeps themselves ignorant of basic knowledge and possibilities - even when that knowledge and those possibilities are positive and growthful in nature - because they're too scared to escape from the tight, cramped box of a wrathful, jealous God and his contradictory message. Don't get me wrong - I think that most people can get a lot of real, genuine happiness from religion. But only a religion that recognizes itself as one among many expressions of spirituality, not one that makes people afraid of new information.

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What is CWG and LCMS?

 

LCMS would be the Lutheran Church Missouri Synod, no?

 

CWG?

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Truth - I know exactly what you mean. The OT makes it pretty hard to have a real good opinion of Yahweh - and you haven't even hit the book of Joshua yet! (Though Exodus isn't cheery either, the Ten Plagues are awful...) I think it's definitely no coincidence that most of the warm and fuzzy type Christians are almost totally unfamiliar with the OT outside of a Sunday-school level knowledge.

 

The idea of an all-loving god out there is one of those things that you don't realize how comforting it was until after you can't believe it anymore. Feels a lot like having a friend die or move away forever - at least it does to me. Makes some things in life a lot freakier too, like realizing just how fragile life really is. :ugh: And of course everyone who's still a believer unwittingly rubs in the salt every time they go on about their faith/god/blessings/etc.

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Am on Lev. right now.. more bloodsheed and animal killings and sins...ohh and uncleanleness. It is pretty disturbing. I did have some what of an understanding but reading it straight through and without the rose coloured glasses it is completly different.

 

If I hadn't just spent a small forturne at the bookstore I would go get a copy of lord of the rings. I have a bunch of other reading to do as well.

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Guest dexys midnight runner

Couldn't agree more. I am reading the bible in a year (each day read a little old testament and a little new testament). I am up to Daniel in the old and 2 peter in the new now. I set out to "strengthen" my faith and ended up where I am now. Our church set out to do it but I'm the only one to stay with it. I bet a very very small percentage know about the OT atrocities and probably don't want to know. You should never question anything..just continue to nod your head at the same old sermons..very sad.

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Actually reading the bible really highlights the dishonesty in church when they feed you a story and you read a verse here and a verse there and you sort of "create" a version of the story that doesn't really exist. :vent:

 

Since it's that time of year the nativity story is a great example. It isn't even in the bible as everyone knows it or as it was preached to me for 30 years (and Linus lies in that damn cartoon too! :nono: ).

 

mwc

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