Admin webmdave Posted June 18, 2007 Admin Share Posted June 18, 2007 Hi, My name is Jillian and I am an ex-xian. You may ask why I started my testimonial as if I were at my first AA meeting. It is simple. I see religion like any other addiction. Things are going shitty in your life, you tend to turn to something external. In my case, I turned to Christianity. Like all other addictions though, it makes your logical thought fuzzy, divides and causes hassles and rifts in your family, and you reason with yourself constantly, that it is actually doing you some good, despite the fact you don't actually like who you are on this "drug" of choice; you think it makes you feel better about yourself and who you are, when in reality you just lose all of who you are and become a fake individual, living in a synthetic, "Stepford wives" kind of pseudo reality. I lived the bliss of ignorance for near 2 decades. Believed what the pastor told me, believed the Ark story, believed the immaculate conception of Jesus... or was it the Davidic bloodline one??... oh well... even though they contradicted themselves it didn't matter, believed that if I dared to ask any questions, that "it's gods will" or "god works in mysterious ways" was a viable enough response, which sadly at the time, made sense because I needed it to! The ironic thing is though, in my quest to please god, I started reading the Bible! ACTUALLY READING IT! Seems that this is the biggest mistake a devout Christian can make: actually reading it, rather than relying only on the carefully chosen sermons of the day provided by the resident brainwasher/pastor, or those chosen for the perky Bible studies class, where you can "glow and grow" in the love of Christ! lol Well, I read and I learned, I cross referenced and read some more. I even asked the pastor as to my many new questions, but it was obvious by his replies that HE had never actually READ the Bible, but instead just went with the fodder he was feeding the parishioners , week to week as well! I could go on and on and on as to my now ex-xian status, however when it comes down to it, it is this simple quote that put my non-belief into perspective. “Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. Love does not come to an end.†If you read the bible, god is impatient and jealous and boastful and conceited and rude and selfish, he takes offense and is resentful, he takes pleasure in peoples' sins and constantly changes 'His' mind as to what truth is or isn't, doesn't like excuses, trusts no one and his claimed love is purely conditional, based on fear and wrath. God is the contradiction of what love is supposed to be... so therefore... see ya God... it's been totally UNreal! To monitor comments posted to this topic, use .http://exchristian.net/testimonies/2007/06...istian-can.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garrisonjj Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 Hi, My name is Jillian and I am an ex-xian. You may After being the good catholic most of my life, they NEVER placed emphasis on the babble. Now I know why. All the good bible (babble) scholars on exchristian have shown me that its just plain bad fictional writing. In the church, you are taught to place blind faith in them and confession and sacraments or suffer the consequences of everlasting fuckin fires of hell! They never stressed the babble. As the fundies would say, "praise jebus" that I have broken free from the constraints and self humiliation of religion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillian Posted June 23, 2007 Share Posted June 23, 2007 Hi garrisonjj I agree. In the fundy baptist "set" I ran with, the word of god within the bible was paramount, until of course a contradiction within the pages of the book were mentioned. THEN, the old walnut of "god works in mysterious ways" always came out of the ...we haven't got an answer but this one ALWAYS works - closet! lol It was all these old walnut answers I got to viable questions (as well as my own investigation) which sent me packing from BABBLE (good term BTW) camp! I too, like you am so glad I broke free of the mindnumbing rubbish and in fact have become a nicer person because of it! I do things because I WANT to, not because it will "please" an invisible friend. It is GOOD to be FREE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted June 23, 2007 Share Posted June 23, 2007 I too, like you am so glad I broke free of the mindnumbing rubbish and in fact have become a nicer person because of it! I do things because I WANT to, not because it will "please" an invisible friend. It is GOOD to be FREE Same here. Welcome to the forum, Julian! It's a treat to see a person respond whose testimony webmaster posts here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillian Posted June 24, 2007 Share Posted June 24, 2007 Same here. Welcome to the forum, Julian! It's a treat to see a person respond whose testimony webmaster posts here. Thank you for the welcome, RubySera! I hope I didn't break protocol by replying. lol There are some excellent topics on here up for discussion and I look forward to diving in and adding my 2 bobs worth! Hopefully, I see you around the forum from time to time. Jillian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 Same here. Welcome to the forum, Julian! It's a treat to see a person respond whose testimony webmaster posts here. Thank you for the welcome, RubySera! I hope I didn't break protocol by replying. lol There are some excellent topics on here up for discussion and I look forward to diving in and adding my 2 bobs worth! Hopefully, I see you around the forum from time to time. Jillian If you broke any protocol, then I don't know what it is. I find myself not too eager to respond to these articles he posts because I feel like I am talking to a disembodied being. The author of the original article seldom sees it to respond to it. That's what keeps me from responding to a lot of them. He also post them on the Main Blog. Sometimes I respond there because that is where the main discussion normally happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 Protocols are there to be broken! Muahaha But in all seriousness, welcome to the site! Indeed, the biggest mistake a Xian can make is to actually read that book of horrors. As a Xian, many passages in the Wholly Babble bothered me, but it took time for all the doubts to build up enough to have an impact. But they impact they had was incredible, and it all helped me to see that Xianity is bullshit and I'll do better by just being honest with myself and kicking Jebus to the curb. The Babble is the best weapon we have against Xianity - the plain text of that awful tome is all anyone needs to dismantle and thoroughly discredit Xianity. After a proper revelation of the sick verses of that book, few ethical individuals can remain Xian - only fanatics and the self-decietful can stick with it. Hope you enjoy your time here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Everglaze Posted June 30, 2007 Share Posted June 30, 2007 Welcome to the boards Jillian and wow, what a way to deconvert. That love passage definitely is the opposite of what god is about. Yet, Christians will argue that his way is not their way, whatever the hell that means (why even bother?). It most likely boils down to the fact that most Christians are sticking by the ridiculous contents of the bible because 1. Fear of Hell and 2. Insecurity. I know from reading the bible all the way through just once makes one realize that it's all fabricated bullshit, used to warp gullible or convicted minds with preachy allegorical nonsense. Then of course, there are always enough stories contained that would make a clown laugh. I mean, a guy surviving the lion's den? A talking donkey? Talk about some acid trip. Reading the bible is a mistake that a devout Christian can make, although my mistake was abandoning fellowship. In the end, both means have restored my rational perspective of the world. That's a good thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lerato Posted July 1, 2007 Share Posted July 1, 2007 In my childhood church they gave a Bible to each child when they were in the fourth grade. I very clearly remember my pastor telling all of the kids to start reading our Bibles at the New Testament. Being a stubborn child I thought that was silly, you need to start reading books at the beginning. So of course I started reading at Genesis and immediately ran into some incredible things - men having multiple wives!, Lot's daughters getting him drunk and then sleeping with him!, Sarah giving Abraham her slave to sleep with! Without a doubt the Bible was the most salacious thing I had ever gotten my 10 year old hands on. It still makes me laugh to this day that fundie Christians are so protective of what their children see and hear and then make them read the Bible all the time. Of course now as an adult I see that on top of some pretty dodgy stories, the Bible is not at all factual and does not depict a God who I would like to worship in any way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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