I Think I Just Joined A Cult

[Ahh!]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

[Mankey]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

I would simply say "I'm not interested anymore you violent racist. Fuck off." and leave it at that.

[Ouroboros]

Tell them that you have moved on and even if you sympathize with some of their teachings, you can't get involved since it would not be completely 100% according to your views now. Don't explain what you think, believe or reasons, because they don't have any reason to know. You can tell them it's a personal thing. No one said that you have to be truthful to everyone all the time. You do what you have to do, to save yourself. Sometimes there's no need to let everyone know exactly how and why.

[Ahh!]

Both of those statements are probably pretty true. I spend a little too much time explaining myself to people and sometimes I let them pressure me by doing this. It's probably best to just walk away.

[Mankey]

Tell them that you have moved on and even if you sympathize with some of their teachings, you can't get involved since it would not be completely 100% according to your views now. Don't explain what you think, believe or reasons, because they don't have any reason to know. You can tell them it's a personal thing. No one said that you have to be truthful to everyone all the time. You do what you have to do, to save yourself. Sometimes there's no need to let everyone know exactly how and why.

Yea. This sounds better than what I said.

 

I am impulsive.

[Ouroboros]

Yea. This sounds better than what I said.

 

I am impulsive.

I am too, but I'm better now. Comes with age I guess. I learned that if you start on a mild not, but firm, and non informative. And if they keep on pushing, then you just have to keep on pushing back and you can slowly increase the heat. Because then you have an excuse. If you start explosive, you come out as unstable and emotional about your decision, and they can actually take that as a sign that you can be manipulated after all. Calm, cool, assertive, without blinking, short sentence, somewhat true, but not more than necessary, but no less than needed, and you come out as a leader and in control. Let them feel that you might try to make them join your "cult" instead, and they'll back off.

 

And Aah!, I used to be straight honest with everyone. If I had done something illegal (not that I did - but if), and the cops would have taken me in, I would have confessed in 0.5 seconds. I couldn't lie, and I'm still a terrible liar. Religion made me this way. And it's good for the marriage, because I can't cheat. I would tell my wife immediately, voluntary, the same mintue, so no, I can't. But when it comes to other people I'm learning to only let them know what they need to. The Internet generation also is a bit of TMI addicts. People tell anyone about everything in their life. But I saw this a long time ago, before computers. One guy I barely knew, told me out of the blue, that he was cheating on his wife. I had no reason to know, and I didn't want to know, so why did he tell me??? Well. That's us humans. If we feel we can trust someone with information, we give them the information. That's what the con artists use against us (con = confidence, it's already in the name, he/she use our easily manipulated confidence against us, and the cults do the same thing.)

[R. S. Martin]

While we're on the topic of honesty. I'll never forget Dad preaching like hellfire and brimstone that we need to tell the absolute truth all the time. I also remember just as clearly the time when I realized that for my own well-being it's better not always to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Even later in life I learned that the there are so many variations of the truth that telling the whole truth at all times is impossible. So sticking with basics like HanSolo advises seems appropriate.

[R. S. Martin]

HanSolo, I am somewhat troubled by your explanation of con artists. Taking someone into one's confidence regarding one's reasons for declining an invitation for reasons of integrity (like Ahh! is proposing) is surely different from taking a person into confidence with the intention of taking advantage of them. The latter is what I would equate with con artist. The first is what I would see as you, me, Ahh! getting tangled up with the wrong crowd because we don't want to hurt anyone by declining an invitation so we give too elaborate explanations and people then all the confusing stuff happens that you described.

 

I think you agree with me. Just wouldn't want someone getting the two kinds of confidence confused. The one is trustworthy; the other is NOT.

[Ouroboros]

I'm not exactly sure what you mean Ruby. Can you elaborate a bit? Not saying that I disagree, I'm just not exactly sure what you meant. (Probably because I took an afternoon nap and I'm a bit dim.)

[Purple]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

 

 

If the contact was in email and you were speaking to them online do you have to reply at all? If you just ignored it, and even blocked the email addy their contact is coming from eventually I think they'll get the message.

[Ahh!]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

 

 

If the contact was in email and you were sepaking to them online do you have to reply at all? If you just ignored it, and even blocked the email addy their contact is coming from eventually I think they'll get the message.

 

Only thing is I've already started messaging back and forth with the guy...

 

He just messaged me like 20 minutes ago outright offering me membership. Before they were just hinting at it. I told him that I had some serious concerns with his group.

[R. S. Martin]

I'm not exactly sure what you mean Ruby. Can you elaborate a bit? Not saying that I disagree, I'm just not exactly sure what you meant. (Probably because I took an afternoon nap and I'm a bit dim.)

 

It's a bit convoluted and long-winded. I'll try to clarify.

 

I see two different kinds of confidence being described.

 

1. The kind of confidence where I (or whoever) feels obligated to provide full explanation for declining an invitation. I think Ahh!'s situation exemplifies this situation, and you explained the problems this can lead to.

2. The kind of confidence used by con artists where the goal is to take advantage of the other person's confidence. This is where strangers sidle up to someone in the supermarket and take them into confidence (get you to trust them) and end up raping or robbing them. At least, that is what I think is the most blatant and offensive meaning of con artist. I would guess some fly-by-night salespeople use the technique, too. They will assure you that if you just write out a check for a certain amount you will be sure to get a certain package in the mail on a certain day. Only it never shows up and the check does get cashed. On schedule.

 

A more benign example might be when an authority figure is caught off-guard by a "little guy." It happened to me once online. The big guy said to me, "I'll let you in on a secret. I thought you were a new person." To "save face" he "took me into his confidence" by "letting me in on a secret." Some people would have laughed at themselves but he did it this way.

 

If Ahh! gives me a full-blown account as to why he must decline my invitation, I will know I can trust that it is from the heart. When this "con artist" "let me in on a secret" I knew he was bluffing embarrassment and that "looking good" is probably more important to him than being genuine. I personally am not emotionally safe trusting his kind "confidence", but I am safe trusting Ahh!'s kind of honest confidence. None of us are safe trusting the con artists describe in No. 2 above.

 

Does that clarify?

[R. S. Martin]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

 

 

If the contact was in email and you were sepaking to them online do you have to reply at all? If you just ignored it, and even blocked the email addy their contact is coming from eventually I think they'll get the message.

 

Only thing is I've already started messaging back and forth with the guy...

 

He just messaged me like 20 minutes ago outright offering me membership. Before they were just hinting at it. I told him that I had some serious concerns with his group.

 

You can request a certain amount of time (sleep on it, the weekend, etc.) to think it over. Don't talk or email in the interim. When that time is expired, you can tell him you gave it some serious consideration and you have decided to decline the invitation but thanks all the same. Then cut the relationship. Just stop responding. Block the email. Whatever is appropriate for the situation.

[Ahh!]

There was this cult some of my friends were in a while back. We were seperated but after I left Christianity, I became interested in this cult myself for a while. I posted on several blogs and groups led by them that I was interested in joining. It's been months now since then and I have lost interest in this group, realizing that it has a cultlike dogma, a racist agenda, and sometimes involves itself in gang activities. They never contacted me until today and suddenly they want to see if they can recruit me. I already have expressed admiration for their teachings. What do I do to get out of this situation?

 

 

If the contact was in email and you were sepaking to them online do you have to reply at all? If you just ignored it, and even blocked the email addy their contact is coming from eventually I think they'll get the message.

 

Only thing is I've already started messaging back and forth with the guy...

 

He just messaged me like 20 minutes ago outright offering me membership. Before they were just hinting at it. I told him that I had some serious concerns with his group.

 

You can request a certain amount of time (sleep on it, the weekend, etc.) to think it over. Don't talk or email in the interim. When that time is expired, you can tell him you gave it some serious consideration and you have decided to decline the invitation but thanks all the same. Then cut the relationship. Just stop responding. Block the email. Whatever is appropriate for the situation.

 

That's what I was thinking of doing. Probably the right thing to do.

 

I got to admit, it is tempting. I agree with 90% of what this group teaches, I devoted quite a bit of time to trying to getting in, it's just that the 10% they teach that's bad is really, really BAD.

[Ouroboros]

Does that clarify?

I think so.

 

But I do think a cult sometimes are using the same methods as con artists. Get to know people, lure them in, get their confidence and then slowly convert them. But of course, that is not saying that this is that situation. I wouldn't know. But I agree, there are of course healthy confidence, and valid confidence even to strangers (like applying for citizenship and talking to a total stranger at the immigration - you better trust them or you're screwed. ). So yes, there's different kinds of confidence, and some are completely valid, but I'm not sure a cult deserved trust or a given confidence. It requires of course also to know if it is a cult or not, or what we would consider to be the definition of a cult.

[Ouroboros]

I got to admit, it is tempting. I agree with 90% of what this group teaches, I devoted quite a bit of time to trying to getting in, it's just that the 10% they teach that's bad is really, really BAD.

A! Think about how you would feel to eat a good, healthy, juicy, thick file mignon, with garlic butter, red potato gratin, and a good merlot... spiked with arsenik. Would you eat it?

[Ahh!]

I got to admit, it is tempting. I agree with 90% of what this group teaches, I devoted quite a bit of time to trying to getting in, it's just that the 10% they teach that's bad is really, really BAD.

A! Think about how you would feel to eat a good, healthy, juicy, thick file mignon, with garlic butter, red potato gratin, and a good merlot... spiked with arsenik. Would you eat it?

That's a pretty good analogy. It's a real pity that they are the way they are.

[♦ nivek ♦]

Ahh!..

 

Four simple letters..

 

F

 

 

O

 

 

A

 

 

D

 

"FOAD"

 

 

Fuck Off And Die.....

 

 

Repeat until they get the message you don't want to give them blowjobs..

 

kFL

[Grandpa Harley]

who are 'they'? I'm usually up on cults (religious and otherwise) but I'm buggered if I can identify who this lot are...

 

If anyone can PM me the answer, then I'd be grateful (seal of the confessional applies)

[LithaB]

I got to admit, it is tempting. I agree with 90% of what this group teaches, I devoted quite a bit of time to trying to getting in, it's just that the 10% they teach that's bad is really, really BAD.

 

Of course 90% of it sounds good before you join, that's how cults manage to lure people in. They only start to reveal their nasty underside after they think they've got you good and brainwashed. Then you begin to understand that what you thought was 90% good is really just a phony surface veneer they let outsides see. And that 10% that looks bad now will grow to 100%.

 

Just stop responding to their emails and messages. You don't owe them anything, not even a polite response. If you want to tell them politely that you have lost interest go ahead, but you don't need to tell them anything. Just stop responding.

[Grandpa Harley]

I can't think of a single chat client (with the possible exception of IRC) that you can't block a sender (people can't send me messages unless their on my white list) and I can't think of an e-mail client after Windows 95 level tech that couldn't 'spam' (junk mail) filter...

 

Sit back, calm down and use the technology that got you into this mess to stop it

 

 

Unless they're camped on your front lawn moaning 'Join Usssssss.... JOINNNNNNN USSSSSSSSS!' Then you're in real shit...

[R. S. Martin]

Does that clarify?

I think so.

 

But I do think a cult sometimes are using the same methods as con artists. Get to know people, lure them in, get their confidence and then slowly convert them. But of course, that is not saying that this is that situation. I wouldn't know. But I agree, there are of course healthy confidence, and valid confidence even to strangers (like applying for citizenship and talking to a total stranger at the immigration - you better trust them or you're screwed. ). So yes, there's different kinds of confidence, and some are completely valid, but I'm not sure a cult deserved trust or a given confidence. It requires of course also to know if it is a cult or not, or what we would consider to be the definition of a cult.

 

 

Oh dear! I'm still not clear. I do NOT mean that he should trust the cult. I mean that we can trust Ahh! when he says the reasons he does not want to join the cult. I should have kept my mouth shut to begin with. Sorry for the confusion.

[Ouroboros]

Oh dear! I'm still not clear. I do NOT mean that he should trust the cult. I mean that we can trust Ahh! when he says the reasons he does not want to join the cult. I should have kept my mouth shut to begin with. Sorry for the confusion.

Aaah! Okay, I get it. Sorry that I totally got so confused. You know how it is sometimes when you start interpreting someones words one way, and you totally miss a different point in there. It happens in my profession (software design) quite a lot. But now I get it. Absolutely, we can trust Aah, and you're right that is yet another trust or confidence side to it. Would we suspect Aah being a con man? Not to me at least. Even though I don't know him personally, just reading his posts and participation on the site makes him a more trustworthy, and I wouldn't suspect him of insincere posts. So you're right, yes, I do trust A's reasons and description of the cult. (I'm still curious which cult it is? KKK?)

[Lycorth]

Ahh!..

 

Four simple letters..

 

F

 

 

O

 

 

A

 

 

D

 

"FOAD"

 

 

Fuck Off And Die.....

 

 

Repeat until they get the message you don't want to give them blowjobs..

 

kFL

 

I was going to say pretty much the same thing

 

And I echo Gramps' question; I cannot help but wonder who this cult is, as I like to think I'm relatively keen on the issue, but your description of them is a little boggling to me, also

[Ahh!]

It's a small local group that doesn't even have a name. They call themselves by a bunch of nicknames, mostly "The Morrocans" but I've never heard of them having one formal name.

 

It's basically a pseudo-Masonic organization. It presents itself as a secular organization based on certain "universal truths," which are it's doctrines. At first glance, these universal truths are simple and very positive: For example, "The children are the most important people in the world because they are the future." They do a lot of work with troubled youth and have helped rehabilitate quite a few because they have a special reputation in the inner city party of town for being friends of the young people. However, as you begin to do research, you begin to find much more strigent doctrines. For example, anyone who eats pork or shellfish in the group is a "poison eater"; verbal abuse is encouraged against poison eaters and sometimes even physical violence happens, though it isn't encouraged.

 

The group also claims to have no central leader. This too proves untrue. The leader does not have a formal title but you can definitely tell who's in charge with some research. And this fellow is not the most pleasant individual in the world. He does do work with young people, and he even runs a small alternative school but he is a very messed up person. He hides his past carefully but apparently he was in several unsavory organizations over the years. He claims to be an atheist but hates gays with a passion. His racialist doctrine is that he believes that Asians, most whites, Puerto Ricans, Arabs and randomly Nigerians, are inferior. His superior races? The Irish, Blacks, and Hispanics. At first, given the loose organization of the group, I ignored this bizarre prejudice assuming it was an individual prejudice that did not affect the rest of the group. Then, I began to notice that the groups were organized along these unusually drawn lines.

 

I received another message from the guy. He told me that it was cool if I didn't want to join up but I should stop eating pork if I did so I would have "strong warrior children." He also wrote something about how I shouldn't trust mickey mouse. I thought, "WTF" and just didn't respond. Hopefully, this is the end of it.