Robbobrob Posted September 17, 2007 Share Posted September 17, 2007 BOSTON - Christmas came early this year. In a bid to render other Holidays completely obsolete, Christmas made a move to the first of December. Channakuh was pissed. Other holidays have started jockeying for position in case Christmas makes a move in their direction. Groundhog Day and April Fool's Day moved to be within the same week as Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Veterans Day moved a week closer to Thanksgiving, and Yom Kippur has been rumored to be in negotiations with Columbus Day. Of all the Holidays, only Easter seemed pleased with the latest development. "Christmas is doing what Christmas should have done long ago, and is finally taking back the reason for the season," Easter spokesman Jesus H. Christ said to repoters outside World Easter Headquarters in New York City. "Christmas knows better than to move too far toward Springtime, though. We'd crucify him if he did." Winter Solstice released a statement which stated: Although we are glad to see that Christmas fianlly moved from our timeslot, we are still troubled by the reports that they are continuing to assert that they are "The Reason for the Season." Last time we checked, without the position of the sun relative to the northern hemisphere, there would be no season to even be a reason for. We wish Christmas good luck on their future endeavors. We paln to take this opportunity to reach out to others and rekindle some of the old traditions, on our longest night of the year. Memorial Day could not be reached for comment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueGiant Posted September 17, 2007 Share Posted September 17, 2007 Congratulations, you nearly destroyed my laptop due to spewed coffee. Much appreciated. *grin* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted September 18, 2007 Share Posted September 18, 2007 December 1: All Atheist Day. No matter what day of the week it falls on in any given year, we can count on having the day off for family, friends, and relaxation. We can also count on having all the festivities available in stores beforehand to get what we want in the line of food and whatever we need to celebrate. The reason for this is that the Christians have moved their High Holiday to December 1. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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