Guest _mike Posted October 8, 2007 Share Posted October 8, 2007 Yesterday, in the garage, just before heading out to a family gathering with my parents and sister, my father gets into one of his awkward angry moods and lashes out at me with a grouchy looking face, raising his voice saying something to the effect of: “I don’t know how much longer I can tolerate your shit atheism. If you don’t get your act together soon and come to your senses, you’re going to suffer at God’s hand. And I will hate you because you refuse to accept Christianity, which is what Christianity tells me to do because we know God hates sinners and those who refuse to accept him. You are an infidel and I cannot accept that. You know nothing and are too stubborn to see the reality of things. How can anyone not believe in God?!!! You have to believe! I will force it upon you if I have to [bitter sarcasm]†The bitter sadness and anger I’ve experienced because of shit like this makes me hate Christianity all the more. I am so pissed off right now. I cannot begin to explain how much I despise this fucking piece of shit religion. I’ve experienced a lot of shit from people since I’ve left Christianity. My former Christian friends and church-going acquaintances have not contacted me for weeks, and some for months, for who knows what reasons; my mother is deeply saddened by my atheism; my father is a fucking asshole when it comes to his views about my position. And besides all the social crap, I am left starting from scratch, at the age of 21, rebuilding my life away from the mother fucking cult I was raised and brainwashed to cherish and believe with all my being. It’s bad enough trying to get over all the psychological attachments I’ve had to the damn religion. Experiencing this kind of hate and ridicule from my closest loved ones is just something I wasn’t expecting. I did not respond to my father when he said the above to me. I gave him the silent treatment for the rest of that evening until now. Usually I am outspoken about my position and am not afraid at all to speak my mind when I am confident in supporting my views. But when it comes to my family, I’ve learned to keep silent. My parents are just too damn stubborn and superstitious that I cannot engage them in logical discourse. The last time I tried to do that, my father and I nearly got into a fist fight. And I still live at home, so I try to keep our confrontations to a minimum. It’s really tough for me to just sit there and let shit like this happen to me without me doing anything, but I am letting my father go because I know that anything I say will only fuel his superior attitude and anger him all the more no matter how convincing I may be. I just hate the fact that religious people can be this way. I mean, I’ve actually seen my morality and demeanor rise to higher levels after I left Christianity, yet these people only seem to see my label, “Atheistâ€, and it makes them so damn uncomfortable for some reason. I’m just so saddened and pissed off. I really think that it is best that I move out soon, but I don’t think it is feasible for me to do that until next year. Starting my life as an atheist hasn’t been easy for me. As I’ve written before on another thread, my social life has taken a dive. I’ve essentially lost most of my previous relationships simply because I no longer conform to Christian ways. And it’s been difficult rebuilding my outlook on life and seeing reality for what it is, without Christian lenses. I hate the fact that my parents and others are so uncomfortable with my atheism. I truly hate Christianity with all my heart soul and mind. Ahh, just ranting again, as usual I guess… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thurisaz Posted October 9, 2007 Share Posted October 9, 2007 So much for those wonderful Christian Family Values... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhia Posted October 9, 2007 Share Posted October 9, 2007 I've heard the same things before coming from my mom, and not to state the obvious, but they suck. My suggestion would be if you're in college to just stay on campus as much as possible. (If you're going to a Christian college, as my situation was, just try to find some people who are more tollerant than the rest that you can at least feel a bit comfortable around.) Just make good grades, make decent friends, and try to live your own life. If you're not in college, just still stay away (again) as much as possible, and it works especially well if you work full-time; because you can still show yourself as a decent, hard-working individual regardless of religion. My personal suggestion, which you can take with a grain of salt, is to tell your parents to take their bigoted, ignorant, and cruel ways (along with their zombie-god), and to shove them as far up their asses as they can. It wont accomplish much, but I know for me just the thought of telling mine put me in a better mood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Jeremiah Posted October 9, 2007 Share Posted October 9, 2007 Mike, There are several good things about your situation: 1. You are angry and pissed off. This is far healthier than being depressed! I actually had to go to my doctor and get some anti-depressants to help me cope with being rejected by my former Christian friends and experiencing the aloneness that I felt. 2. You are young and you have your whole life to look forward to! I'm going to be 55 next month and I wish I had seen the light back when I was 21! 3. You are not a sheep! You are thinking for yourself and making informed decisions that are right for you. 4. You can make new friends that share your beliefs. 5. You have discovered a really great support group here in Ex-Christian.net. People like Rhia and others who have been through similar situations and are willing to share their experiences with you. 6. You are already seeing your morality and demeanor rise. In my experience and the experience of many on this website, Christians are among the most hypocritical people in existance! You can be true to yourself! 7. There are dating websites of free thinkers that are not religious. 8. I know this is sick, but your parents probably think they are acting in your best interest by trying to force you to be a Christian, as uninformed and misguided as that may seem. I have been asking folks on this website how to change other's belief systems, and I've concluded that that is not a good idea, as much as we wish we could! 9. If you are working, you can probably find a room to rent somewhere where you might find more peace. 10. If you have to stay at home, you can fantasize about telling your folks off like Rhia suggests. Keep reading the forums on this website. Watch the George Carlin videos on religion for a laugh! Read Acharya's website at TruthBeKnown.com. Visit Skeptically.org, EvilBible.com, and do some research on the Inquisition, Crusades, Bible Inerrancy, Fundamentalism, and other sites recommended by members of Ex-Christian.net. Know yourself and be true to yourself! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramen666 Posted October 15, 2007 Share Posted October 15, 2007 Wow I am sorry this shit happens whenever I read this kind of shit I feel for you guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ephesos Posted October 15, 2007 Share Posted October 15, 2007 Just tell those people what I do pretty often... "you know... I tend to wish everybody ten times of what they wish for me... it tends to happen, and - you know what? It is just... everybody gets what they want, don't they?" That's when I turn around and leave them to the few thoughts they have. If they still continue to babble about this sissy of a gawd - well, how about "you know... I don't care about him, neither does he care about me. If he cares about YOU, that's YOUR problem, not MINE, and I couldn't care less. Here's 10 Cent, buy a balloon... that might listen to that gibberish." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
South2003 Posted October 15, 2007 Share Posted October 15, 2007 Here's 10 Cent, buy a balloon... In other words, Religion is nothing but letting off some steam! I second that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ThinK Posted October 15, 2007 Share Posted October 15, 2007 Mike - sorry to hear about your family. I wish people could just accept others for their beliefs, and actually follow the teachings of their religion. So much for love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skiergirl24 Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 My fahter is much the same...though less militant. He tries to engage me and whenever I pose a question about God that he cannot answer he gets flustered, yells and changes the subject. He has taken to calling me "Madeline Murray O'hare." Haaaaaaaaaa! I try not to talk about religion with my family as it never ends well! Yesterday, in the garage, just before heading out to a family gathering with my parents and sister, my father gets into one of his awkward angry moods and lashes out at me with a grouchy looking face, raising his voice saying something to the effect of: “I don’t know how much longer I can tolerate your shit atheism. If you don’t get your act together soon and come to your senses, you’re going to suffer at God’s hand. And I will hate you because you refuse to accept Christianity, which is what Christianity tells me to do because we know God hates sinners and those who refuse to accept him. You are an infidel and I cannot accept that. You know nothing and are too stubborn to see the reality of things. How can anyone not believe in God?!!! You have to believe! I will force it upon you if I have to [bitter sarcasm]†The bitter sadness and anger I’ve experienced because of shit like this makes me hate Christianity all the more. I am so pissed off right now. I cannot begin to explain how much I despise this fucking piece of shit religion. I’ve experienced a lot of shit from people since I’ve left Christianity. My former Christian friends and church-going acquaintances have not contacted me for weeks, and some for months, for who knows what reasons; my mother is deeply saddened by my atheism; my father is a fucking asshole when it comes to his views about my position. And besides all the social crap, I am left starting from scratch, at the age of 21, rebuilding my life away from the mother fucking cult I was raised and brainwashed to cherish and believe with all my being. It’s bad enough trying to get over all the psychological attachments I’ve had to the damn religion. Experiencing this kind of hate and ridicule from my closest loved ones is just something I wasn’t expecting. I did not respond to my father when he said the above to me. I gave him the silent treatment for the rest of that evening until now. Usually I am outspoken about my position and am not afraid at all to speak my mind when I am confident in supporting my views. But when it comes to my family, I’ve learned to keep silent. My parents are just too damn stubborn and superstitious that I cannot engage them in logical discourse. The last time I tried to do that, my father and I nearly got into a fist fight. And I still live at home, so I try to keep our confrontations to a minimum. It’s really tough for me to just sit there and let shit like this happen to me without me doing anything, but I am letting my father go because I know that anything I say will only fuel his superior attitude and anger him all the more no matter how convincing I may be. I just hate the fact that religious people can be this way. I mean, I’ve actually seen my morality and demeanor rise to higher levels after I left Christianity, yet these people only seem to see my label, “Atheistâ€, and it makes them so damn uncomfortable for some reason. I’m just so saddened and pissed off. I really think that it is best that I move out soon, but I don’t think it is feasible for me to do that until next year. Starting my life as an atheist hasn’t been easy for me. As I’ve written before on another thread, my social life has taken a dive. I’ve essentially lost most of my previous relationships simply because I no longer conform to Christian ways. And it’s been difficult rebuilding my outlook on life and seeing reality for what it is, without Christian lenses. I hate the fact that my parents and others are so uncomfortable with my atheism. I truly hate Christianity with all my heart soul and mind. Ahh, just ranting again, as usual I guess… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lifelong_agnostic Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 Mike, the reason I found this board was for the very reason you are pissed off. I came here because I've been shunned by x'tian family members and I'm trying to understand why. I used to be SO mad and angry about all of it, but as I get older I just realize that the level of their anger is directly proportionate to the level of their love for you. So, when your dad is screaming -- it's out of love. He is terrified that his son is going to hell. That has to be a horrible feeling for him, and you will never conquer those feelings with logic. He's not going to be logical. He's NEVER going to see your side. He just loves you and wants his boy to be safe and SAVED from the hellfires of damnation. So, whoever told you to get away is very right. For now, you need to separate yourself until he cools down. It may be a long while before that happens. I think you just need to remain calm by repeating to yourself that "he is yelliing at me because he loves me....the louder he yells, the stronger he loves." Believe me, I know it's a strange way to show love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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