Jump to content
Goodbye Jesus

Christian Oxymorons


Brother Jeff

Recommended Posts

The Spook of Kryasst who is also somehow magically Him magically inspired me to create this glorious list of religion-related oxymorons. No, not morons, but oxymorons. If I created a list of Christian morons in America, it would be several thousand miles long and probably would reach from Anchorage, AK to Houston, TX! :HaHa: I'll start it off with:

 

1. Biblical Facts - because the bible contains precious few actual facts

2. Creation Science - because creationism does not even remotely resemble real science

 

Can you think of any to add? :grin:

 

Glory!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3. Free Gift of Salvation - we've been discussing it a lot lately (religiously?) and salvation certainly isn't free

4. Infallible Word of God - (goes with Biblical Facts I guess) it's hardly infallible OR the word of god

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Christian Love.

 

Often used to justify the rejection, or poor treatment, of another person. Also the excuse given as to why a christian is present immediately after a tragedy without bringing real aid (instead....they bring casserole). The true purpose is to glean juicy details to gossip about later.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How about:

 

Jesus Christ

 

Seems like an oxymoron.

 

mwc

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Intelligent Design?

 

love offering

 

I don't know if "prayer meeting" would be, but I do know where ever two or more are gathered there is gossip.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Christian tolerance - In truth Christians are about as tolerant as members of the KKK were during the civil rights movement. Any thought, statement, idea or life style that goes outside of their dogma is squashed , shunned, denounced and when all else fails they turn it into a Christian persecution fest.

 

 

Free will with God- The same kind of 'free will' one gets during a robbery, if you don't comply die. It's after all your free choice. :Wendywhatever:

 

 

Love the sinner and hate the sin. As much as I hear this bullshit line. I have only see them hate the sinner because of the 'sin' which isn't sin.. but I digress.. .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Christian Science Monitor - because it doesn't sound right.

A podcast I use to listen to, "To the point", frequently uses journalists from TCSM, and I just can't get it every time I hear "......, journalist from The Christian Science Monitor".

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Love of Christ

 

The Son of God

 

The Son of Man

 

"Jesus was 100% man and 100% God" - said often at my old youth group to placate those who asked how Christ could be both man and god at the same time.

 

Seeking the Face of God

 

etc, etc, etc.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

John 3:16-For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Putting aside all the trinity confusion, the idea that his "son" had to die to forgive our sins, and we have to be "saved" or God will make us suffer in hell forever. That God simply can't forgive those truly repentant, that it takes such a convoluted method. Not to mention that so many things considered sins are just human nature.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

True believer (because belief is not predicated upon nor dependent upon truth*)

 

Forgiven sinner (bible says you can't go on sinning; it would mean you were unsaved)

 

Holy Bible (it's hardly holy in all its content and bible just means book, anyway)

 

True god/False god (existence of god cannot be proven or disproven, ergo, neither can any particular gods' identities or characteristics over against others.

 

*Before anyone like a raving xtian fundie starts getting all in my face, let's ask the question:

 

Is a little kid's belief that there is a MONSTER in his closet predicated upon truth? Impossible; the kid has no empirical evidence to prove that monsters exist outside of his imagination or his reaction to a cartoon he saw.

 

Is that kid's belief in the aforementioned monster DEPENDENT upon truth? Again, not at all. YOU know damned well that there is no monster, but try telling that to the kid.

 

These oxymorons exist because the reality I have suggested is outside the mental ken of the average xtian, which reality is totally ignored by xtians of the fundie variety.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[no]Premarital Sex

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Real Christian.

 

Since many of these aren't terribly concerned about what Christ taught, or about reality.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Babble-believing christian™

 

Because not a single one of them believes in the whole book'o'bullshit. No big deal, with all the contradictions in it you can try forever, in vain.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Honest Preacher (I've yet to meet one in person)

 

Good News (Believe or burn,good news?)

 

Virgin Birth (Obvious)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One true god.

Since all gods are false, how could there be one true god?

 

True faith.

Since faith means trust, how could trust be true when truth means proof of evidence and trust in something has not yet occurred?

 

Focus on the Family.

Since some families have gay children and Christians are against gays, how could Christians focus on a family?

 

The love of God.

How could God have any love when he is the creator of everything, then turns around and condemns many of the things he creates, plus he kills innocent people and causes all sorts of diasters?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

christian televangelist

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Gospel Truth.

I like this one best. This is an oxymoron.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The title of one of the forums here, actually: Sex and Christianity.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Being of... One Mind, One Spirit or One Body - there is no such thing as "one" anything in xianity...even Gawd is a 3-for 1

 

Liberal Christian

 

Christian Persecution

 

Peace of God

 

Christian Life

 

Scriptural Authority

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.