par4dcourse Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 I had to make a rare appearance in church (southern baptist) sunday. My niece died fri evening. She was close to my age (44) but hasn't been well for some time. Alchohol finally got her, and her liver quit. While she's greatly missed, it wasn't totally unexpected by those who knew her best. Anyway, the first preacher was an older fellow, and other than a few references to heaven he kept mainly to the subject, which was Sherrin's life. Then came the second salvo. The second guy preached a full-on come-to-jebus meetin' in the graciously short time he had. So why does this guy think its his gawd given right to use an emotional moment to try and practice his craft? On reading that sentence, I realize I just answered my own question. Ok, instead of a question, let me say I'm pissed as hell at that asshole and I hope his million dollar church falls to the ground around his sorry ass! Empty of course, I'm not morbid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GraphicsGuy Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Condolences for your loss...and for having the time of gathering turned into a tent-crusade. Funerals should certainly be a time of sharing a message of hope, but outright proselytizing? Horrible. Of course, Xians consider it the "Good News" and a message of hope in and of itself. It's such a vicious circle... Again, condolences for having to go through so many things in a short time period. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 I understand exactly what you are saying. Some little shit of a man got up at my grandfather's funeral and gave a full blown alter-call gospel sermon. I was pissed. My grandfather was a dedicated xian, but he was also a great man. This little twerp didn't bother to learn a thing about my grandfather's life and instead used his time to try and gain new members to the congregation. Ironically, I and my cousin were probably the only non believers in attendance. I'm still bitter about the experience as I'm sure you can tell by my response here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 That's one thing they didn't do at my mother's funeral--either they didn't preach at me or my mind blocked it out. Old Order Mennonite funerals are always large so if they did preach at the "unconverted" (anyone not dressed plainly), my mind could always say "they're not talking about me." Par, sorry you got the works. I know what it's like having a stranger preach at a loved one's funeral. It was a favourite aunt in my case. The first preacher knew my aunt and I felt comforted by his sermon but the second was a visitor from the States and had never seen her. He was preaching mainly to satisfy the folk who had come to be entertained by a guest speaker. Vig, that was really nasty what they did at your grandfather's funeral. Targeting you and your cousin like that. Talk about a cruel religion! We're told not to make major decisions when we're grieving but apparently decisions about Christ and eternity don't count, just temporal ones like buying or selling homes or getting married. Is that their unconscious breaking through and saying "We know that for real Jesus doesn't exist but we'll pretend he does and you definitely have to play along with our game or we'll punish you for it!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Harley Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 For my dad we only had two readings Psalm 23 (KJV) cos dad liked the poetry Hebrews 13:1-5 (NIV) cos my dad was like that... and no eulogy... Dad hated eulogies by 'some random bloody bible beater who didn't know the body in the coffin from a dead pig'... and my mum didn't want me to do it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piprus Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Deepest sympathies on the passing of your niece, par4, I don't know why the southern baptists think they have to use the moment of a funeral to evangelize. I mean, can't they do that any other time? I've seen it happen before in my own family. Sheesh, a funeral is supposed to be for the comfort of the family and friends of the deceased, to comfort them in a time of loss. Maybe it's that old fundie saw at work..."you may not survive the trip home! Get right with Jesus now, before it's too late!" Gahhh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trashy Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 This should be a reminder to us all, especially those that have fundy relatives, to make out your will! Be very specific about any sort of memorial service! I shudder to think of my dad using MY funeral to evangelize but he'd do it in a heartbeat if he could... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 Thanks to all for your thoughts. I've had a bit of a run of late. I, too, was one of the few non-religious in attendance. They know they have you by the short hairs 'cause it's unlikely anyone will cause a scene. I certainly wouldn't embarrass my fundie mother at such a time. They have a captive audience. I wondered to myself "if the little bastard didn't have the threat of eternal punishment hanging over him, would he be so 'helpful'?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robbobrob Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Sorry for you loss Par. I was at a funeral once where the RCC priest would not acknowledge that there were non-Catholics in the church. About half of the people in attendence were either Jewish or non-religious. But the priest would not give any of us a clue as to when to standup/sit down/ etc. He even got frustrated when we did not do it right. We were there to grieve and say goodbye, but instead, we all became frustrated and annoyed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beowulf Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 As you pointed out in your initial post, funerals are an emotionally-charged time, and some idiot preachers insist on capitalizing on this. Southern Baptists are the usual culprits, but Methodists can also be guilty. I attended a college student's funeral - he had committed suicide - and the Methodist minister insisted on a come-to-Jebus service. Totally inappropriate. My sister and I are the ones from our large family who usually attend relatives' funerals. We're the only ones with flexible jobs that allow us the time. We do so out of respect for our relatives. At some of these, though, we have to stifle a laugh at the theological shenanigans. I remember one rough-around-the-edges Baptist minister eulogizing a great-aunt with the words, "That there's not a pretty sight [pointing to my aunt's coffin], but Gawd's given her a gah-looooorious body!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aqua Kitty Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 I understand exactly what you are saying. Some little shit of a man got up at my grandfather's funeral and gave a full blown alter-call gospel sermon. I was pissed. My grandfather was a dedicated xian, but he was also a great man. This little twerp didn't bother to learn a thing about my grandfather's life and instead used his time to try and gain new members to the congregation. I HATE that scenario SO much it makes me sick - and it seems that's what the average funeral turns out to be these days. One notable exception - a Quaker/Friends pastor recently did a funeral I attended, and he was awesome. The funeral was all about the deceased, his life, and his family. No prosyletizing at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xandermac Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 I'm sorry for your loss. I've been to funerals where the preacher gave alter call. I'm thinking seriously about no funeral at all. I would much rather my friends and family have a party in my honor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SWIM Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 Sorry for you loss Par. I was at a funeral once where the RCC priest would not acknowledge that there were non-Catholics in the church. About half of the people in attendence were either Jewish or non-religious. But the priest would not give any of us a clue as to when to standup/sit down/ etc. He even got frustrated when we did not do it right. We were there to grieve and say goodbye, but instead, we all became frustrated and annoyed. With lots of RCC relatives, I too have been to several RCC funerals. The last one was rather odd. The RCC priest actually said "he didn't understand the workings of god and heaven", and his whole sermon sounded borderline atheist... very strange. Then again, at some RCC funerals they preach full bore, but NEVER in an RCC funeral have I seen them "seeking members" in the preaching. RCC people are just weird. Seems like more then half of them are bewildered without direction. The sit, kneel stand is done robotically, the mantras are spoken like an old recording, no emotion. RCC is about the strangest sect of this cult I have encountered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 I'm sorry for your loss. I've been to funerals where the preacher gave alter call. I'm thinking seriously about no funeral at all. I would much rather my friends and family have a party in my honor. That's exactly what I've gotten from this whole experience. I'm writing my last will so that none of this bs happens when I go. I'm not in the best of health but I plan on making life miserable for my enemies for a while yet. When I do check out, I want cremation and a farewell party. My wife is ok with this, as long as my fundie mother doesn't outlive me. She'd do it for spite! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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