It's Official

[mlr72]

Effective as of Friday, November 30, 2007, at 5:22 P.M. EST, I officially denounce my faith in Jesus Christ.

 

After all I have learned in the past week, I feel like I have been kicked right in the stomach from a religion whose idol never existed. And while I was down, the sorry excuse for a religion has kicked me in my head, stomach, spread open my legs and took a size 12 boot, and stomped my genitals until I'm unable to have kids.

 

Astrology. The very thing that Jesus Christ told us not to take part in, is the very thing that brought his existence into being. The very thing that I promised God at the age of 12 that I would never do, is the very reason this piece of shit religion exists in the first place.

 

Yeah, I'm angry!! To quote Peter Finch, I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore!!

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

No more pagan idolatry that the very same church loathes will I partake in! No more communion, praying to a false idol, no more baptism, and not one more word from that book that every neophyte, blind Christian believes to be the very word of God. I don't want to hear ANY OF IT! I've had it with being lied to from a god that NEVER EXISTED!

 

I only wish that this digital format could capture the pure anger that I'm feeling right now so that all of you could download it for yourselves! And the worst goddamned thing is, I can't say one word to anyone because I'll be written off as a lunatic!! It's madness!!!

 

I'm going to go out tonight and I'm going to get blitzed and I'm going to have a good time without fear of repercussion from a god that's as imaginary a fairy tale!

 

NO MORE!!!

[Ouroboros]

Welcome to the harsh reality. Truth hurts. And I sympathize with your anger.

 

So what exactly happened last couple of weeks? I guess you might have another thread... I'll look for it...

[GraphicsGuy]

There's nothing that can truly express the rage until you feel it for yourself. Unfortunately this is only the buildup. Wait until your first clash with a Xian and they make the assumption that you were never really saved...

[Thurisaz]

I'm going to go out tonight and I'm going to get blitzed and I'm going to have a good time without fear of repercussion from a god that's as imaginary a fairy tale!

 

NO MORE!!!

 

Never having truly been in a morontheist coven, I have no right to say that I "know" how you feel right now... but I think at least intellectually I can imagine it.

 

Truth can hurt... but after the hurting's gone you can start to heal.

 

<Morpheus>

Welcome to the real world.

</Morpheus>

 

Let out your frustration (just stay on this side of the law please ). It's kind of self-therapy. After that... we'll see

[R. S. Martin]

Sorry, can someone edit this page so it fits my screen? I understand your anger mlr, but I can't read the posts without shifting left and right. Because of my low vision I need the screen set to very large and the window is stretched--possibly all that is needed is to remove a few of the exclamation marks off the agh in the first post. Thanks.

[SWIM]

Sorry, can someone edit this page so it fits my screen? I understand your anger mlr, but I can't read the posts without shifting left and right. Because of my low vision I need the screen set to very large and the window is stretched--possibly all that is needed is to remove a few of the exclamation marks off the agh in the first post. Thanks.

 

 

Yeah its the big long ahhhgggghh!

 

LOL

 

Hey welcome aboard! mlr!

 

booyah!

[R. S. Martin]

Welcome to the harsh reality. Truth hurts. And I sympathize with your anger.

 

So what exactly happened last couple of weeks? I guess you might have another thread... I'll look for it...

 

Hans, first of all, thanks for fixing the thread so I can read it.

 

Second, here's mlr's "preview" thread where he introduces himself. Title is I've Had Enough!

[R. S. Martin]

Effective as of Friday, November 30, 2007, at 5:22 P.M. EST, I officially denounce my faith in Jesus Christ.

 

<snip>

I've had it with being lied to from a god that NEVER EXISTED!

 

I only wish that this digital format could capture the pure anger that I'm feeling right now so that all of you could download it for yourselves! And the worst goddamned thing is, I can't say one word to anyone because I'll be written off as a lunatic!! It's madness!!!

 

Thanks for expressing some of the rage I feel.

 

The lies are the worst. And the oppression in the name of the lies.

 

I've had to cut ties with family to escape the abuse because of the lies.

 

Mostly I don't talk to people in real life about my beliefs because I'm afraid of what they would do or say. I've had some very bad experiences that happened before I learned to be cautious. I just talk on here.

 

I am lucky in that I found one neighbour who is atheist. I hope you find someone, too, that you can talk to.

 

Like someone else said, just be sure to stay on the right side of the law. You don't need a spoiled record on top of everything else.

[Brother Jeff]

Welcome to the Real World, mlr72. The truth does hurt! I think you'll find that most of us here understand the anger and the rage you are feeling right now. I know when I found out that I had devoted 15 years of my life to a demonstrably false religion and that basically nothing I had believed for all of those years was actually true, I was FUCKING PISSED OFF! You have a right to be angry, and this is a place where you can vent around people who understand and care. Just please don't let yourself get eaten up with bitterness. I've been down that road, and it's not pleasant. The best revenge is a happy and fulfilled life lived without religion. Glory!

[Brother Jeff]

Effective as of Friday, November 30, 2007, at 5:22 P.M. EST, I officially denounce my faith in Jesus Christ.

Wow, so that's what the Talking Snake and his evil spooks were so happy about yesterday afternoon. And I thought they were just celebrating my birthday with me... Shit, they had me fooled!

 

[Kelli]

MLR,

 

Congrats! Letting go of Christianity isn't an easy thing. For me there was a lot of fear involved, even after I made the decision to leave church and had decided I didn't believe in Jesus anymore.

 

Welcome to life after Christianity.

[par4dcourse]

Welcome.

From what I've read and experienced, de-conversion happens in steps.

First, you're extremely pissed, since you realize that they handed you a line of shit, 'n you swallowed it hook, line, and sinker.

Soon after, the rage subsides a little (although we're still waiting on Grandpa Harley to calm down) and you feel a sense of loss, since a big part of your social life and support group is gone.

Then, strangely enough, a sense of peace enters. No more pretending, lying, questions with no answers, etc.

My experiences thus far. Your own mileage may vary.

[mlr72]

Hi all. I'm sorry about the prolonged battle cry.

 

It's just that everything hit me yesterday right between the eyes like a 20 pound sledge hammer as I was driving home from work. I was finally beginning to realize that everything I had ever learned as a child and up until this week has been an absolute lie. Driving home, I saw nativity scene after nativity scene, and with each one I passed my knuckles became whiter as I my grip on the steering wheel became tighter.

 

All of my Christian friends, my brothers, my family are going to be shell-shocked when they ask me to say grace for Christmas dinner. What will I say? What will they say? I know 4 people in particular are going to crumble and tell me that I'm just having a crisis, and that they'll pray for me that God will forgive me for doubting. And what's worse, when I give them 100% hardcore proof for the reason for my de-convsersion, they'll just say the usual, "Wow, Satan has really blinded you! I'll pray for you tonight!"

 

I know how precious their faith is to them, so I don't want to see them crumble in the same way I did this week. My nephew is a pastor in has his own growing church. His life would come to a screeching halt. I don't know what to do: Tell them everything I have learned and get thumped with a Bible, or let them live their lives in total, hopeless ignorance.

 

I have so much to say...

[Japedo]

Hi all. I'm sorry about the prolonged battle cry.

 

It's just that everything hit me yesterday right between the eyes like a 20 pound sledge hammer as I was driving home from work. I was finally beginning to realize that everything I had ever learned as a child and up until this week has been an absolute lie. Driving home, I saw nativity scene after nativity scene, and with each one I passed my knuckles became whiter as I my grip on the steering wheel became tighter.

 

All of my Christian friends, my brothers, my family are going to be shell-shocked when they ask me to say grace for Christmas dinner. What will I say? What will they say? I know 4 people in particular are going to crumble and tell me that I'm just having a crisis, and that they'll pray for me that God will forgive me for doubting. And what's worse, when I give them 100% hardcore proof for the reason for my de-convsersion, they'll just say the usual, "Wow, Satan has really blinded you! I'll pray for you tonight!"

 

I know how precious their faith is to them, so I don't want to see them crumble in the same way I did this week. My nephew is a pastor in has his own growing church. His life would come to a screeching halt. I don't know what to do: Tell them everything I have learned and get thumped with a Bible, or let them live their lives in total, hopeless ignorance.

 

I have so much to say...

 

Hi Mlr,

 

 

I'm so sorry to hear about the grief you're experiencing with all of this, The deeper one is into the cult, the more devastating it is once we see things as they are. Rest assured many of us have been there, I don't know that there is anything we can say to make this any easier. Anger and Rage are two things I personally had to deal with as well. I was so shocked and horrified to learn the truth.

 

The more you rationalize the more you'll find that many Christian don't only know about the pagan past, they have excuses for it. Such as.. Well God was just laying the ground work and so forth. They know and they don't care. This was also something I had a hard time believing, but you'll see.

 

If you're asked to say a prayer at xmas dinner you can possibly do one of three things. (or more.. ) but I have three things to offer,

 

1) Stand up and give a toast to peace on earth and good will toward men. Say how thankful you are that you have your family and friends and this year you have done a lot of reflection and after you go on about that, pass the prayer torch to someone else. This will let everyone know that your the same person without doing the prayer thing.

 

2) Stand up and say, Because the walk with god is personal one, I suggest we all have a personal prayer to ourselves............ Amen. and sit down and eat.

 

3) Say no thanks someone else can

 

I wouldn't 'come out' at xmas. For one you'll be ganged up on when your in a fragile emotional state of just having the loss of something you once held near and dear. Xtians will take this as an opportunity, the more anger you show, the more they will paint it as a test from god. With kids and family around I don't think it's the day to set everyone out to freak out for your soul. Holidays are stressful enough. Go and enjoy your family, if they get to rabid about God and what not call your evening short and hit up a movie or something with a loved one or alone. (The golden Compass is an idea )

 

I would wait until you have closure and you work thru your phases of grief, I know that it feels right now that the anger will never leave, and it might not in part, but life is very different once your outside the cult. It's very freeing but at the same time people who love you will find this extremely hard to accept, so I wouldn't tell everyone on Xmas, they very might well have their stages of grief for you as well.

 

I had to find new meaning in Xmas after I left the faith. It now is a tribute to my family and loved ones. I also take great pride in all the pagan aspects of the holiday. (Trees, colors, lights, gifts, ect) It of course has taken me years to get to this point tho, It's not easy.

 

I wish you much luck and peace of mind thru this difficult process. We're here if you need us!

[Antlerman]

Hi Mlr. I'm not sure how religious your family is. Are they more generally social Christians (Lutherans, Presbyterians, Episcopalians, etc), or are they church going, Bible reading, born-again evangelical types (Baptists, Assemblies of God, etc)?

 

I find myself in agreement with Japedo's advice about not "coming out" at Christmas time with everyone, and how to handle grace if it comes up. If you have to, I'd let the focus of the "prayer" be those at the table. You need time to process all of it. It's really like a breakup of a relationship, and how would you go about telling your fiancée’s family about your feelings about their child you no longer love? "Your kid sucks?". In no way do you loose your values of respect for others when you leave Christianity (in fact you'll find it shoot up about a thousand or so notches, I'm sure). The time will come for discussing your thoughts and feelings about it with them, if you find it necessary it all.

 

My father knows I'm an atheist, but I've never come out and said to my mother's face that I am, though she knows I no longer identify with Christianity. I don't see a reason to put it to her like that, since she could more easily take that as a challenge against her, and that's not what my atheism is for me. It's about me. If however she was pushy about me converting, then of course I might respond differently. In either case, you aren't alone with this and you have a whole bunch of people here to talk to about it until you're ready to deal with your family.

 

Sorry to hear the level of pain for you, but.... giving birth hurts. Like I said, just wait to see what life is going to be for you now! It's amazing what becomes possible when the horizon has been opened up like this.

[R. S. Martin]

Hi all. I'm sorry about the prolonged battle cry.

 

No problem. I hated to speak up because I knew the feelings were genuine and needed to come out and I hated to tamper with that. On the other hand, you're expressing some of my own feelings that I haven't been able to express and I really wanted to be able to read your thread. I think Hans found a great way to solve the problem. No need to apologize.

[Aqua Kitty]

It's just that everything hit me yesterday right between the eyes like a 20 pound sledge hammer as I was driving home from work. I was finally beginning to realize that everything I had ever learned as a child and up until this week has been an absolute lie.

 

Sorry for the weird digression, but -

 

When I was where you're at right now, this album made me feel better:

 

 

Well, not so much the actual album as the album title. It made me laugh and helped me to see the weirdness in perspective, and I think that helps. At least it helped me.

 

OK, someone post something that's more constructive than this!

[mlr72]

Sorry for the weird digression, but -

 

When I was where you're at right now, this album made me feel better:

 

 

Well, not so much the actual album as the album title. It made me laugh and helped me to see the weirdness in perspective, and I think that helps. At least it helped me.

 

OK, someone post something that's more constructive than this!

 

That's exactly what I'm learning: That everything in life is wrong, and not at all what I thought it was. Maybe life really is a dream...

[Piprus]

That's exactly what I'm learning: That everything in life is wrong, and not at all what I thought it was. Maybe life really is a dream...

As a newly-minted ex-christian, life sure isn't what you may have thought...no doubt about it. But life isn't a question of whether it's right or wrong, or even whether life is good or bad. It just is what it is. Not a dream either, really. It's as real as it gets, and when you look at the wonders of this reality, the only one we'll ever know, it's awesome. Enjoy your journey, m'friend.

[mlr72]

That's exactly what I'm learning: That everything in life is wrong, and not at all what I thought it was. Maybe life really is a dream...

As a newly-minted ex-christian, life sure isn't what you may have thought...no doubt about it. But life isn't a question of whether it's right or wrong, or even whether life is good or bad. It just is what it is. Not a dream either, really. It's as real as it gets, and when you look at the wonders of this reality, the only one we'll ever know, it's awesome. Enjoy your journey, m'friend.

 

Good point(s).

 

By the way, even though I'm a Steeler fan, I was SUPER FUCKING PISSED OFF from the Ravens/Pats game on Monday. You guys got ripped off!

[Piprus]

By the way, even though I'm a Steeler fan, I was SUPER FUCKING PISSED OFF from the Ravens/Pats game on Monday. You guys got ripped off!

Mmmm...yep, to a point, but bad calls are part of the game too. If the Ravs played as a team instead of a group of individuals, they might have won it. Hats off to Boller, who showed he has the potential to be a lead QB. Maybe next year...

[RIPw4]

welcome to the dark side luke! mwuhahahaha.

 

seriously. Welcome. Thinking for yourself is a great thing.

I am so open minded my brain falls out sometimes.

[Thurisaz]

Maybe life really is a dream...

 

Hehe... ever had a day when you felt like "Oh well, let's give it a try" and spoke into the empty air "Operator - I need an exit!"?