I Used To Be A Better Atheist

[florduh]

After years of praise, worship, and the usual Christian antics, I came to realize that God simply wasn't there. Nobody talked me out of my belief. I didn't have a special sin I wanted to commit away from God's prying eyes. I just never got any feedback from the Almighty no matter what I did.

 

I walked away, sorry I had wasted my time and money, but it was over. Never gave a thought to any more. I wasn't out to deconvert anyone else. I wasn't afraid to openly admit I didn't believe anymore, but I didn't go looking for trouble. If I had to answer a census question like "are you Christian, Jewish, Other, I simply would have checked Christian. When people at the dinner table prayed, I bowed my head and just silently waited until they were done. If someone invited me to the Christmas pageant their kid was in, I'd go and try to appreciate their performance. But I never thought about God at all. It was just a non-issue. Militant atheists seemed obnoxious to me. God wasn't a subject even worth debating. I believe that is the strongest atheist position of all. Anything concerning any gods is just irrelevant, and therefore you have no "hot buttons" to get pushed by religious folks.

 

There are probably lots of actual atheists like that who don't get counted as such, because they blend with the dominant Christian society. True atheists who have no gods, but go with friends or family to special church services, bow their heads at public prayers, and don't even wince at the "under God" addition to the Pledge of Allegiance. They simply don't care. God is irrelevant. It's a beautiful, peaceful place to be.

 

With the rise of the militant Christian Right, and maybe a little boredom creeping into my life, I became more outspoken and militant about my atheism. I almost feel obliged to defend my position now. I have the urge to actively fight the encroaching theocracy. But it also seems like all this activity directed against the god belief somehow adds credence to the god. Not believing should be passive, but I feel like I'm actively not believing. Too much work for a lazy man!

 

Does any of this make sense?

 

- Chris

[Legion]

There are probably lots of actual atheists like that who don't get counted as such, because they blend with the dominant Christian society. True atheists who have no gods, but go with friends or family to special church services, bow their heads at public prayers, and don't even wince at the "under God" addition to the Pledge of Allegiance. They simply don't care. God is irrelevant. It's a beautiful, peaceful place to be.

 

Does any of this make sense?

Chris it makes perfect sense to me. I am still in the category you describe above. I don't care. The concept of God is irrelevant, neither inspiring my admiration nor provoking my anger.

 

But I agree that there is something distinctly unpalatable about religion reaching for the reigns of political power. I seem to remember that one of the temptations of Jesus was to stand upon a mountain and observe all the cities of the Earth. And Satan said if you will only bow to me, all this will be yours. Have some failed this same temptation?

[Vendredie]

Make perfect sense to me too Florduh. Before my sister outed me I didn't care either, I bowed my head during group prayer, I really didn't care about Christianity being around 24/7. But then I got outed and my mom freaked out, which is why I'm going militant too. I know militant isn't something I should be, but it's hard when people shove their beliefs in your face and expect you to lap them up. Same thing in politics. I wish an atheist would run for president rather than Christian fundies.

[gradstu09]

I hear you. I'm fairly against militarism just as a matter of course. Fighting fundamentalism with fundamentalism doesn't make much sense to me. I am more open about being atheist now than I used to be. It seems important to be 'out' in this political climate (I'm in the US), but I'm really not one for showboating.

[white_raven23]

Interesting. There are more places to be of course, but the extreme examples are the ones that get all the attention.

 

Atheists are either "in the closet" or "militant".

 

Gay people as a group are often described the same way. They are either "in the closet" or "flaming".

 

Just like gay people, there are plenty of atheists who are simply open atheists. And they probably resent being chucked into the "militant" category as much as openly gay people get irritated about being thrown in with the "flaming" crowd.

 

But those extreme viewpoints are typical of people not in the group being observed.

 

The other problem is there are highly devout people who perceive open disbelief as a full-scale frontal assault no matter how unemotional and matter of fact the expression actually was. So even if a person simply says, after being directly asked: "I don't think any gods exist", there are those people who will just emotionally detonate in response. And later, exhausted from their adrenal shit-storm, will perceive the disbeliever in question as having been "militant".

[ShackledNoMore]

That's a good point. I guess I must be somewhere between "closet" and "militant." I don't bow my head at public prayers, nor do I make a scene--I tend to stand in an "at ease" position with my eyes open (very interesting for observing, BTW). I do wince at "under god," but I haven't brought the issue to center stage. I would not check "christian" on a form, but I might leave it blank.

 

And I don't think there are any "shoulds" here. I don't think a person "should" be more or less militant than me, or the same. That said, I agree that there is good reason to oppose any fundies whose agenda it is to control your life or mine.

[Vigile]

I don't know if you could categorize me as militant, but reading Chris's OP about how he used to be completely ambivelant about christian belief, I found that I could not empathize.

 

Interestingly though, last night my wife and I were listening to Aaron Neville sing Ave Maria. We both found this song beautiful and highly moving. While I guess you could categorize it as a xian song I can be completely ambivelant about that fact and just enjoy the beauty. That's probably because the song is oriented toward the catholic church and Mary never had any type of impact over my old belief system. IOW, I was never harmed or damaged by the catholic set of beliefs and as such I find it completely unoffensive in its art forms.

 

On the other side of the coin, I doubt I could ever find beauty in listening to the song Amazing Grace, even if Placido Domingo stooped to singing it. The difference is, I have a history with that song and that particular set of beliefs that runs deep.

 

While I don't plan to go to war with the protestant church and don't consider their members my enemy, I cannot be ambivelant about their particular set of beliefs. I loathe what they believe and it has me at a core emotional level that I'll probably always carry with me.

 

I could never sit through a protestant church service without wanting to crawl out of my skin. OTH, if I was somehow compelled to sit through mass or a Mormon service, I would probably sit there calmly and observe like a curious anthropologist.