Guest eejay Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I was just curious how you all felt about issues with funerals/burials. Some of you are fortunate enough that you were never pushed into the x-tian mentality by your family so this may never be an issue with you. But from a lot of posts I've read, many of you are still involved with a somewhat x-tian family. I find the x-tian faith so offensive that I want to be certain to not have a x-tian funeral or burial when my time comes. I am not trying to be morbid, but if it doesn't get addressed beforehand, it is probable that my remaining family would just go ahead and do what they would want. I realize that when you're dead, you're dead, but I really don't want a fucking cross or x-tian symbol hanging over my remains. I don't want some preacher or priest praying over me. I just want to be certain that when the time comes that the message is loud and clear. How do you you guys feel about stuff like that? Do you care? Or have you conveyed your wishes to your family? Do you think they would go against your wishes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skiergirl24 Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I told my father flat out...if anything ever happens to me...I DO NOT want to be propped up in a casket, clutching rosary beads, for all to gawk at. No prayers, no priests, no funeral mass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hereticzero Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I'm getting cremated. My ashes will be scattered with my wife's someday. What my heirs do for funeral or not is up to them. I don't really want any funeral. I'll leave a keg of beer next to the front door on the way out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 In my opinion the funeral is only something for those left behind (spouse, parents, kids, friends). They need a place for their grief and loss. I really do not care about this stuff, so whatever my wife or my kids would help to deal with this situation is fine to me. I have officially left the church, so no preacher will pop up. And if anyone feels the need to share a few words, fine. There might be a tombstone, but no bible verse or xian symbols. Again anything that helps my family is ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Harley Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Far as I'm concerned they can stick me in a jar of formaldhyde and use me as a door stop... what they do with the trash I leave behind really isn't MY business... IF they want to they could give me to Dr. Gunther von Hagens for one of his 'works of art' I'll spare the squeamish from linking to any of his works, but a google image search on the word "plastination" would be enough to give some of the harder men here pause... I think his work is remarkable... don't rate his autopsy technique mind... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deva Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 If either of my parents are still alive, they can do whatever they want, I won't be there so I don't care. If they want to give me a Baptist funeral, that's fine. As Michael said, funerals are for the survivor's benefit. If I survive my parents, however, I will instruct my brothers, sister in law and/or nephews that I do not want any type of funeral. Cremation and scattering of ashes over the ocean is my personal preference. I will preplan it if possible. Neither of them are particularly religious and I don't think they would have a problem with it. Gramps, there is one of those weird "body" shows down in Ft. Lauderdale. I am not squeamish when it comes to viewing horror movie carnage - but that is the real thing - dead bodies. No thanks, I don't want to see it, remarkable though it may be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I'm going to be cremated and have my ashes scattered on the trails of Alaska that I enjoy hiking so much - specifically at Echo Bend on the Crow Pass Trail, if possible. Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
upstarter Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I'd like to not care about what they do after I'm gone, but I don't want anyone using my death and funeral as a way to preach to non-believers. I don't want my friends feeling all weird and uncomfortable. Even if I'm not there. Hubby and I have both said we'd really rather people have a party than a funeral. I'd like my friends to gather and celebrate all the great times we've had together. Cremation is a definite. I will give all the parts of me that anyone can use and burn the rest. Scatter me on or near water. Hopefully my parents will go before I do, because really, they are the only people who would care about the lack of Jesus at my funeral. Heather Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comanche Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Definitely want to be cremated, and my ashes dropped over the edge of either the Grand Canyon or a reasonably large mountain. I agree about wanting it to be more of a party than a somber thing - I'm going to insist in my will that they play So Long and Thanks for All the Fish instead of sad music. And I plan to write my own eulogy. "[Comanche] would like you to know that she appreciates you being here, and that the punch is spiked. She also hopes any religious people here will realize that she is either 1) a random and inconsequential collection of atoms without conscience or 2) doing the alligator crawl with Hades. In the event of the former, well, she doesn't really care either way. In the event of the latter, she hopes you can join her soon and assures you that the pomegranates are still very ripe and juicy down here. And that Hades is impressively awesome and has never heard of this "God" person whom you speak of, though he is sure that Zeus will be very happy to personally stamp your ticket for Charon (remember to give him a handsome tip - he's very busy with all the monotheists these days). If this outcome is the case, she should concede the point that there is an afterlife, but since you'll never know, she's just going to go ahead and tell you 'I told you so!' in either case. Now, enough of that, let's get this party started!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hineni Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 My family knows that I want to be cremated and my ashes either strewn beneath a certain tree or if possible, take the ashes to Ireland or Scotland and scatter me off a cliff. If my son survives me, he wouldn't be able to stand a christian funeral and I think it would be hurtful to him. The last funeral we attended was nothing to do with the person who had died, but was an alter call for the lost in the captive audience. I also have a friend who would rip a preachers head off if one should preach a sermon. Her father was a preacher and she's now an atheist...a very angry atheist, at that. I prefer a good ol' fashion wake. I really don't want my body on display, as I don't want that scene to be the last that they see of me, physically. Just burn me and party! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Harley Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Word to the wise... you need permission to dump biological waste in the United Kingdom... dunno about Ireland, but it was after they discovered prions could contaminate cremains... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hineni Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Damn it to hell! No Ireland or Scotland, then. A tree it will be! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hineni Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 Wait! I do recall seeing Kathy Griffith dumping her father's ashes in Ireland. There's still hope for Ireland, maybe should I drop dead soon. Yay! But thanks for the heads up, Gramps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Harley Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 I don't know about the Republic... but ANYTHING involving stuff that may contain human proteins you have to get a permit to dump in the UK... it's the whole BSE/vCJD thing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I Broke Free Posted March 24, 2008 Share Posted March 24, 2008 We have a family tradition of cremation followed by a family/friend gathering at the deceased home; my grandmother and both my parents where done this way. My father worked for a funeral home part time and was the one who warned us all about how much of an expensive scam it all is. If you don’t have anyone officiating at the home-service it is much easier have your wishes observed. I have instructions in my will that this is what I want for me too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest eejay Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 I see most of you that answered prefer cremation, and I am planning for that myself. Looking at having the ashes placed in the bore of a propeller blade instead of an urn. I just don't want anything religious. Both my parents were cremated, but are in a catholic cemetary and they had a protestent service. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xandermac Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 Xandermac, that's hysterical! Deva, I'm with you. If my religious parents are still alive, they can do what they want, but my wife knows otherwise it's creamation and a New Orleans style funeral party! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godlessgrrl Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 I plan on the cremation route as well, with no funeral or memorial service. I've made it expressly clear to my spouse that I want absolutely NO religious trappings whatsoever, least of all xian ones. No fucking preachers, no church, no pastor, nothing - I am an atheist in life, and a religious service of any kind would not represent me in death. If my family members need religious counseling, they can seek it on their own. I'd much rather have a gathering of the clan somewhere, some kind of party, with balloons and lots of beer and fun happy music, maybe with pics of me that my family and friends enjoyed, so they can remember if and what they want to. I'm fine with folks divvying up my ashes to scatter in several spots too, and to mingle a portion with my pets' ashes and my spouse's ashes when he finally goes as well. I'd love to be scattered in Hawaii, or somewhere in the waters of Puget Sound, somewhere like that. But once everybody I know is dead, I could be scattered into a vat of Folger's crystals for all I care. Or have my urn used as a paperweight, or something to fertilize the roses. It really doesn't matter much, beyond a certain point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piprus Posted March 25, 2008 Share Posted March 25, 2008 I was faced with that exact issue when my wife died last year. In accordance with her wishes, she was cremated with no viewing or funeral. She was an ex-christian and a Deist. Her ashes were scattered as she wanted. The same thing will happen to my remains. Her fundie-evangelical family, my in-laws, were told, and very emphatically by me, of her beliefs and wishes. I left it open to them, that if they wanted to have a christian service in her behalf, they could certainly take the opportunity to do so, at their discretion. But I said that I would not attend, out of respect for her beliefs, and my own. (Her father declined to attend as well, and for the same reasons). So it went. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest laceknitter Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 I am a very amateur gardener, and tho it's probably not legal, I'd like to be buried by one of my fruit trees. Kind of a "giving back". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The-Captain Posted March 29, 2008 Share Posted March 29, 2008 Id rather not have a funeral personally. If some people are sad about my passing Id rather no rub it in their face with a ceremony. Aside from that I'd like to be burnt, ideally on a Viking longship being pushed out to sea with all my belongings. Failing at that I want my ashes buried in the ground with little ado, that way my constituent parts can get back to the universe at large quicker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snakefoot Posted April 1, 2008 Share Posted April 1, 2008 I plan to donate my body to science--assuming anybody will want it. Medical school cadavers, skeletal displays/teaching aids, and many other uses for cadavers, and then they cremate the remains when done. Works for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awoodpd13 Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 My first post here! In the words of the "Motor City Madman" Ted Nugent, "...sometimes you wanna get higher, and sometimes you gotta start low, some people think they're gonna die some day - I got news you never gotta go!!!" For me: Cryonics (www.alcor.org). Now just gotta convince the wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chefranden Posted April 2, 2008 Share Posted April 2, 2008 I want to be left out in the woods for the bears, crows, flies, worms, bacteria... to eat. There's no good reason to waste all this meat and supper time is such a joyful occasion for the eaters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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