gabby Posted March 31, 2008 Share Posted March 31, 2008 Grrr...don't know what to say really...basically I am obsessing today about the cult that I left and giving myself panic attacks by googling former church members. On the bright side there is a method to this madness. They were part of a home church movement and they are run by a predatory "prophet" that preys on unsuspecting college students in Texas. I would like to warn ppl about them but by looking them up I am dredging up bad old memories. I have only been de-converted for about two years...is it too soon for me to try to deal with this? They are really a destructive group and feel like I should be letting someone know before they destroy anymore lives. I don't even know who to tell...I just came across a website where they are being all smarmy about the fact that they are street preaching in the campus free-speech zone (an oxymoronic title if there ever was one) and a webpage that is shilling the pastors books where they claim he has never accepted any money in his life ever! This is total bullshit since all the tythes from the church go directly to line his pockets. I know these ppl are very dangerous but I don't know how to warn ppl about them. Any advice, ya'll? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabby Posted March 31, 2008 Author Share Posted March 31, 2008 Thanks for the advice MM. I'm so sorry to hear about the situation with your old church...I hope that you can get your shadowbox back someday. Unfortunately, I don't know any other people who have left the church and now I don't even live in the same state. Also they prided themselves on just being "the Church" so they don't have a listed name that I know of so it would be hard for me to track down any other ex-members (if there are any). I will probably just put it down for now till I am in a better place. Thanks again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted March 31, 2008 Super Moderator Share Posted March 31, 2008 I agree with waiting until you feel totally confident. You need to escape completely before you can help others. But it's a noble ideal you shouldn't abandon, just wait for the right time. All the best, - Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabby Posted March 31, 2008 Author Share Posted March 31, 2008 From a Christian book website that sells "prophesies" from my former church leader: "I had specifics concern or questions regarding a few portions of the book. My detailed concerns were graciously accepted and answered by the author. Our contact with him has been very encouraging and a blessing! I know that some feel very strongly about ANY type of up-front charge, due to Scriptural standards concerning the 'love of money' and the serving of mammon rather than God. Examples of standards they would hold in high regard would be similar to those practiced by David Wilkerson or the late Keith Green. Also, those who feel this way do themselves preach and write the Word without ANY up-front charge themselves. So they are not merely being cynical or critical: they are holding to their ethics and do not expect of others what they would not do themselves. If this is the case with you, please be encouraged with the following facts about the author's ministry, and this book in particular: (I post these here because the book itself does not have most of these facts therein, and there is no real description of his ministry!) * ---- ------ has been in full-time, mostly itinerant, ministry for over 28 years, without requesting an offering for himself. (This fact is on page 95 of ----- ------ ------by the same author, published in 1992. He maintains that this practice continues and now adds up to 28 years.) * Many of his publications have been given away for free; he often refuses profit--especially from the less-advantaged brethren. * He has been involved in the church-planting ministry of churches that meet in homes since 1976, 1 Cor. 14:26 variety." (End Quote) ________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________ This really bothers me. I mean the guy who runs the site confessed "he had concerns about the book" and then he goes on to claim to justify the $$$$ issues by stating that it's a fact cause the "prophet" wrote about it in another book in 1992. In fact I remember that we all lived very modestly and gave a lot of money in tyths but before I left I started to wonder about a few things like...Hmmm, we meet in a coffeehouse so there is literally no overhead, where is all that money going? I mean it would be different if the money was being used for some community program but instead it just kind of disappeared into thin air. Anyhow, it pushes my buttons so I'm gonna stop with the googling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted March 31, 2008 Share Posted March 31, 2008 *Hugs* I agree with Madame, wait until you get some people to back you up and feel confident. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marie Posted April 1, 2008 Share Posted April 1, 2008 Hi, gabby- I think that, if it were me, I'd let it go, even if I really had to force myself to do that. After two years of trying to move on from that chapter in your life, letting any aspect of those people back in in any way, could wreck everything. Also, it's not our responsibility to protect everyone. That's a lesson I learned when going through exposure-response therapy for my OCD- apparently, "overresponsibility" is a symptom somewhat related to religious scrupes. I was taught to re-train my beliefs to recognize that "others' responsibility begins where mine ends", and vice-versa. It's that organization's fault if they damage anybody else, not your fault. The most you can do is keep speaking frankly about your experiences online and among real-life contacts (while being careful not to slander the group in any legal way, or take any other personal-safety risks), and do your personal best to move on. Don't give up on yourself! It takes people years. I've been around and around and around the revolving door of church/walking away/reverting/walking back away, etc., since I was in junior high! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kozimoto Posted April 1, 2008 Share Posted April 1, 2008 Hey Gabby, I left an abusive church, went to another, and finally left xianity altogether. And the thing is, even when I still believed in god, jeebus and the bloody baby manger good times, I would actively tell people not to go to church X. This was the thing for me - after we left that church, the pastor was forced to give me a written apology, but continued to hurt other people the same way. So even if he was "not perfect, just forgiven" people needed to be warned away from him. But in the end, you can't change the system, which really bloody sucks. The people who didn't go to church X because of a warning, went to another church to get screwed over. People who don't give their money to this guy will probably just give it to another charlatan. thoughts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabby Posted April 1, 2008 Author Share Posted April 1, 2008 Hi, gabby- I think that, if it were me, I'd let it go, even if I really had to force myself to do that. After two years of trying to move on from that chapter in your life, letting any aspect of those people back in in any way, could wreck everything. Also, it's not our responsibility to protect everyone. That's a lesson I learned when going through exposure-response therapy for my OCD- apparently, "overresponsibility" is a symptom somewhat related to religious scrupes. I was taught to re-train my beliefs to recognize that "others' responsibility begins where mine ends", and vice-versa. It's that organization's fault if they damage anybody else, not your fault. Thanks for the advice, Marie! The quote about "others responsibility begins where mine ends" is really helpful to me, b/c I never really thought about it that way. I have problems with hanging on to the past and feeling guilty...I think I am going to post that quote on my bathroom mirror Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabby Posted April 1, 2008 Author Share Posted April 1, 2008 Hey Gabby, I left an abusive church, went to another, and finally left xianity altogether. And the thing is, even when I still believed in god, jeebus and the bloody baby manger good times, I would actively tell people not to go to church X. This was the thing for me - after we left that church, the pastor was forced to give me a written apology, but continued to hurt other people the same way. So even if he was "not perfect, just forgiven" people needed to be warned away from him. But in the end, you can't change the system, which really bloody sucks. The people who didn't go to church X because of a warning, went to another church to get screwed over. People who don't give their money to this guy will probably just give it to another charlatan. thoughts? Yeah...I hear you. The ppl in this "church" are masters of the good old "bait & switch" method of x-tianity. They made me feel so welcome and loved at first while at the same time they managed to get me to "break ties" with everyone outside the church. Once I was good and alienated from the outside world, they upped the "holiness" ante and pretty much started controlling my whole life. I heard whispers from my old friends (who I didn't hang out with anymore b/c they weren't "saved) that I had gone off the religious deep-end and had become involved in a cult but I took it as a sign of "holy persecution". I saw other ppl become involved with the church for a short time and then suddenly drop out and it's my guess that they probably had a better "bullshit radar" than I did. I just feel for those ppl like me who got sucked in and didn't realize it until mad amounts of damage had already been done. I agree with you that you can't change the system...and yup, it bloody well sucks. :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gabby Posted April 6, 2008 Author Share Posted April 6, 2008 Hey ya'll...thanks for the advice. I kinda had a breakthrough today...um...basically I just thought that the church that I went to was charismatic but, thanks to google, I found out some new things today that blew me away. I just found my church's new website where they say that they are part of the "local church" movement and they base their teachings on some ppl called "watchman nee & witness lee". I am really confused...how did I spend 2 years at this church and never know this? Sure, I heard the leaders talk about their books from time to time but never from the pulpit. I don't even know what this stuff is...I can't believe that the whole church was based on something I know nothing about. I genuinely just thought they were charismatics. Frankly this is really freaking me out...I have tried to find some info on "watchman & witness" but only got that they were Chinese missionaries of some type. I feel so stupid. If anyone knows anything about this sect or something that might give me a better grasp of what kind of group they are please let me know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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