The Benefits Of A Christian Life

[mlr72]

On my long drives home I spend a lot of time doing one of two things - listening to the radio and/or thinking. Today I was thinking.

 

Last night I took my twin nieces out for their sixteenth birthday dinner. They're both very devout xtians, raised single-handedly by my sister-in-law, who "led me to Christ." Although I am, quite thankfully, no longer a xtian, I have to say that she has done a wonderful job of raising them. They're both very active, bright, and talented kids. They're both currently writing books and playing music on a daily basis. So, I thought about these two great kids in my life. On one hand they're being lied to on a daily basis, but on the other hand, they're both exceptionally gifted and bright and raised

 

Looking at my own life, I realize that I was only lied to by a god that never existed, having gained only pain and misery in my xtian "walk". However, it may be different for others. I realize that possible benefits may not outweigh the lifetime of lies, but are there any positives on being a xtian?

[Vendredie]

One positive, for me at least, was that I took some of the supposed values (such as no gossipping or hating people) seriously, and I've trained myself not to gossip or hate. I think I missed the memo though, since I was always in a Baptist church and I didn't know you weren't supposed to take the gossip/hate lessons seriously. Oh well, makes me a better person.

 

another is that since I always came off as slightly below average intelligence, adults treated me pretty nicely, and were smart enough to realize that I'm actually far above average intelligence

 

those were the only ones though.

[Crazycatlady]

It depends a lot on the individual, in my opinion. I think that by nature itself, I was already very predisposed to feel guilt more intuitively than most people, more apt to take everything very seriously, more apt to try to be as perfect as possible, more apt to focus on my failures than my successes, etc. Obviously, with that background, Christianity could be nothing but quite harmful to me. Honestly, I don't how much of this is a result of being raised Christian and how much was "hard-wired" into me at birth, but I do know that I am much more susceptible to the harmful teachings than any of my sisters or christain friends were. One of my sisters, on the other hand, might not have developed a conscious or concern for her fellow humans without Christianity. So much depends on the individual. There really is no one-size-fits-all.

[Trev]

It depends a lot on the individual, in my opinion. I think that by nature itself, I was already very predisposed to feel guilt more intuitively than most people, more apt to take everything very seriously, more apt to try to be as perfect as possible, more apt to focus on my failures than my successes, etc. Obviously, with that background, Christianity could be nothing but quite harmful to me. Honestly, I don't how much of this is a result of being raised Christian and how much was "hard-wired" into me at birth, but I do know that I am much more susceptible to the harmful teachings than any of my sisters or christain friends were. One of my sisters, on the other hand, might not have developed a conscious or concern for her fellow humans without Christianity. So much depends on the individual. There really is no one-size-fits-all.

 

Yes, I agree with this

[ogilvy]

i can honestly say that becoming a christian was a benefit more than otherwise to myself and my kids. i was a single mother, with 'issues' and christianity gave me stability ,purpose and security. my kids enjoyed the church activities, youth groups, camps, and even the church services, especially the special ones, like when guest speakers came, like from bob jones university! they were our heroes! i was quite strict in some ways, with my kids, but when they reached their teenage years i didnt force them to go to church. now they're adult, one still goes, one doesnt, which is fine by me. they dont regret their 'strict' upbringing. they are like those kids the OP mentioned, bright, postiive and creative. also they have nice ways with people, especially vulnerable people. if i hadnt become a christian, i dont know what our life would have been like, as i was a bit 'fragile', well, a lot fragile. during the christian years i was 'strong' and positive, and feel that i achieved quite a lot as compared with what i had been before. eg. i did 2 courses and got a job which meant i wasnt depending on welfare, still not. even though i've lost my christian beliefs, the strength and stabililty have stayed with me.

[L.B.]

I suppose there might be benefits. If you are a 'joiner', like my wife and I are, then xtianity is a place where you can find plenty of social interaction. Twisted, stunted, blindingly bland social interaction, to be sure, but there it is nonetheless.

 

As far as xtian life was concerned, both as a layperson and as a pastor and evangelist, the benefits basically took the shape of being adored by the glassy-eyed divorcees and frustrated wives of the rabid uber-fundies (NOTE: It was not always emotional or sexual attraction; it's just that I was more eloquent and well-read than the husbands and ex-husbands of these women, so they projected their unresolved feelings onto me as well as others). In all seriousness, there was always an 'underground' cadre of younger evangelicals who were pissed at their local church's establishment. Even after I deconverted while still on the job, I loved to get into passionate discussions about how things needed to change and these young fundies needed to 'rise up' and take their rightful place as leaders, etc.

 

All in all, then, if you want the benefit of benign existence in a sheepfold combined with the fun of listening to the deluded ramblings of the next 'prophets' of our time, fundy-vangelicals are the ones to hang with.

 

If, however, you want the benefits of sanity, conversations that don't sound like they should begin with 'once upon a time' and the freedom to think out loud, then stay away.

[mentalhh]

It did help me in some ways, being raised a christian and becoming one in my teens until I was 19 (last year). I could sort of see from the outside, some of the bad things of society I didn't want to be a part of. I never smoked mainly due to the 'your body is a temple!' and only drank on special occasions. As a result I'm a tad healthier than some of my atheist/agnostic friends from my secondary school are right now.

 

 

Fact is if I wasn't cn, I might have bowed to peer pressure and smoked and drank alot more, and regretted it later on- of course I WAS technically bowing to pressure (from an unseen thing I called 'Jesus'), but hey at least I've got healthier lungs out of the deal. XD. I'm not saying that all secular people drink themselves to oblivian- but w/o me being more scared of God and the church etc etc- I almost definitly would have done something stupid like that because of my peers, I was very easily manipulated emotionally in my early teens- hence how I became a cn in the first place.

 

So yeah, better lungs and a better liver than I otherwise would have at this stage (some of my friends, who started smoking etc. at 13, are starting to feel the effects already)...

[Vigile]

If I had to do it all over again, I can honestly say I wish that my parents had been atheists and had raised me with values of reason. Note I didn't say different parents, just that I wish the ones I have were atheists or at least not church-going xians.

 

That's not to say that I didn't have a good upbringing or even good times with my church community. I can't think of one thing the church gave me that was good that was uniquely christian doctrine. I can, however, think of a great deal of things that they gave me that were entirely fucked up.

[Eponymic]

I realize that possible benefits may not outweigh the lifetime of lies, but are there any positives on being a xtian?

 

Of course their are benefits. People wouldn't do it otherwise.

 

The biggest ones being the social network. You instantly have lots of people you can associate with, go to events with, etc. You have lots of support and help if you need it. Certainly this support comes with caviats, but while you're in the network, the support is strong. Which is why it's so hard for many people to give it up. They don't want to lose that network of social and personal support. Beside the fact that many people's lives (i.e. hobbies & activities) are completely based around what their church's social network does.

 

There are also people who miraculously managed to take only the good parts of Chrisitianity and filter out most everything else and are excellent people living fantastic lives.

[Vomit Comet]

It probably saved my life.

 

I was a prime candidate for an early grave, or the mental hospital, or prison. That was my testimony. Even my agnostic dad and new age mom acknowledged that the church saved my ass, but now I suppose I take their view of it rather than the one I held while a Christian.

 

I don't know that I would have made it into my twenties were it not for the church people that came into my life. I still maintain a deep love and respect for them, even though I'm avoiding them. I'm avoiding them because it would hurt them deeply if they knew. Well, fortunately, most of them I haven't seen in years, so I can just write them off, and relegate them to pleasant memory.

 

I take the view that it was a phase in my life that I've outgrown.

 

I do think it would have been a whole hell of a lot better if it wasn't for the sexuality thing. I would have liked to start getting pussy as a teenager, just like all the other kids got to do. I feel that it robbed me of the sexual vitality that occurs between a young man's mid-teenage years and mid twenties. Even though I now have a girlfriend that I might marry - the one thing I always wanted, and that God never gave me - I sometimes get very wistful because I've only slept with two women (including her) starting at the age of 28. I'm not a cheater, but sometimes I find myself wishing that I could go out and fuck maybe five or six other women, maybe one to five times apiece, just to get it out of my system.