Guest christianlongago Posted April 27, 2008 Share Posted April 27, 2008 I am new to this site so my complete understanding of what makes me an Ex-christian my be a bit off. I was never born again and was not raised in a strong religious household but always seemed to have religion/church near by. I think I just drifted away from God. does that qualify me as an Ex. Here is my religious background. 1. My mother a good Catholic from Boston married my dad a Methodist. My mother's family disowned her for years. You did not marry outside your faith in Irish Boston in 1951. 2. I have uncles on my fathers side that were pentecostal. 3. I was raised as a Methodist. I even ran the sports programs at my church as a teenager and taught Sunday school. Our youth team allowed players of all religions. Only church in town that did that. 4. I went to a Jesuit College 5 I majored in Geology. No 6 day then resting story there. And not to mention dinosaurs 6. Married a Catholic girl and had to take all the "conversion" classes so that I could get married in a Catholic Church 7. I signed paperwork that my children would be raised Catholic. I never was the victim of abuse, brainwashing or that sort off stuff. I was along for the ride. I just began to think that god, religion and all the fan fare was a bunch of crap. My family became victims of serious, incureable illnesses and I thought why us. I was an honest ,hard working father and faithful husband yet lost everything and thought why me. I think I fit in being an ex-christian. I believe in something, maybe spiritual. At least that sounds good. But maybe I should believe in me and forget the bible, Sunday morning church, Church weddings and funerals and all that stuff. Once in awhile I would go to a beautiful Catholic Church in town and light 3 candles for the 3 women in my life I loved so dearly and who have died horribly, my grandmother, mother and teenage girlfriend. Maybe I should just light one candle and make it for me and not do it in a church. Maybe out in the moonlight. I have had these feelings for years but am just no expressing them. Religion is a tough subject for me to discuss with anyone because I almost had no opinion on the matter and I would come off as insincere and non-caring. Maybe I am not an ex-christian but a slowly evolving atheist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deva Posted April 27, 2008 Share Posted April 27, 2008 I think I fit in being an ex-christian. I believe in something, maybe spiritual. At least that sounds good. But maybe I should believe in me and forget the bible, Sunday morning church, Church weddings and funerals and all that stuff. Once in awhile I would go to a beautiful Catholic Church in town and light 3 candles for the 3 women in my life I loved so dearly and who have died horribly, my grandmother, mother and teenage girlfriend. Maybe I should just light one candle and make it for me and not do it in a church. Maybe out in the moonlight. I have had these feelings for years but am just no expressing them. Religion is a tough subject for me to discuss with anyone because I almost had no opinion on the matter and I would come off as insincere and non-caring. Maybe I am not an ex-christian but a slowly evolving atheist. Its OK if you were not ever what you or others would think of as a strong Christian - so what? "Drifting away from God" I assume you mean the Christian God? If so, sounds like an ex-christian to me, or one in the making. Deconversion is a process. Sometimes a very long one. Most people dont give religion the consideration and deep thought that we ex-christians have. A lot of people are "along for the ride". Then one day for whatever reason it hits them "it's all wrong!" then they never go back. I say don't worry about these kinds of definitions. I believe in some "spiritual" things too. Others here don't. That's perfectly OK. Its OK to go in and light a candle in a church from my perspective. Christianity is not all about intellectual belief. There are many deep layers. Maybe one day you really won't want to light a candle in a church. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gradstu09 Posted April 27, 2008 Share Posted April 27, 2008 It's sort of like sexuality. No one can tell you what you are or aren't. Personally, at this point in my life, I have the strongest identification with 'atheist', and I think that this is very likely to be my final resting place. At various other points I have considered myself a deist, a former Catholic, a non-christian, and agnostic. Identities evolve. If you feel that ex-christian describes you, I don't think anyone here is going to tell you otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 Nope. No-can-do. You can't be an Ex-Christian, so says the holy rulebook of Ex-Christianism... you can however be an Un-Christian or an Nuhuh-Christian. Maybe you're good enough for the label Nix-Christian? Just kiddin'! But you're still welcome to our site! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comanche Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 I never was the victim of abuse, brainwashing or that sort off stuff. I was along for the ride. I just began to think that god, religion and all the fan fare was a bunch of crap. My family became victims of serious, incureable illnesses and I thought why us. I was an honest ,hard working father and faithful husband yet lost everything and thought why me. Hey there! I'm not born again, either. I was pretty much a Christian in name only, believing in the Holy Farter and praying without any complaint (though anyone who knows me can tell you that I now sit there with a self-satisfied smile on my face and try not to laugh at their imaginary friend). Welcome to the site! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vomit Comet Posted April 28, 2008 Share Posted April 28, 2008 Refer to my "Church Attrition" thread that's currently near the top. If there's anything at all to my tentative unrefined categories, you might qualify as someone who simply drifted off from a liberal mainline church without very much personal drama involved. I used the metaphor of force generating force in the OP of that thread: those who walk away from a liberal mainline church have been hit with a Nerf Bat, whereas those who walk away from a fundie church have been hit with a cro-bar. Well, by all means, correct me if I'm wrong, because I'm not about pigeonholing people. But since fundie churches make the situation much more extreme (hellfire and damnation unless you're born again; you'd better do exactly what we tell you once you become a Christian; the fire gets turned up to 11 if you're a fallen former Christian), whereas liberal mainline churches (I assume the greater part of Methodism qualifies as such these days) are more hippy dippy and deemphasize or gloss over the less savory bits of the Bible, I reckon this might be a real pattern. So basically, I'd say you only differ from the rest of us by matter of degree. (Refer to my rough, unrefined continuum with seven points along the way.) Here's the link to that thread: Church Attrition and Ex-Christianity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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