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Goodbye Jesus

Little Baby Jesus


quicksand

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We are all so very familiar with an adult Jesus nailed to the cross.

 

But why wait until Jesus was a 30-something? If Jesus is as pure and innocent as a new-born, why delay until he's an adult to pin his ass to the cross? (Yes I know the gospels follow pre-established religious narratives...) Isn't his purity & innocence effectively the same in both cases?

 

My thinking that an adult Jesus is perceived, ever so slightly, as less innocent or as pure as child - much less a new born to the believer.

 

If it was little baby jesus nailed to the cross, do you think Christians would salivate over the torture death of a new born like they do over an adult every Sunday?

 

Just a thought experiment... what do you think?

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  • Super Moderator

I think a picture of the Baby Jebus on a cross would make a great t-shirt.

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Thread_Crap_Jesus_Cry.jpg
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Ugh. Please no babies on a cross!

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  • Super Moderator
Ugh. Please no babies on a cross!

 

Then how should we execute them?

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Then how should we execute them?

 

Florduh, I thought you just ate them live.

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  • Super Moderator

I'm shocked at your insensitivity.

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A baby on a hot-cross bun is maybe cuter.

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I'm shocked at your insensitivity.

 

What??? You actually cook them?

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  • Super Moderator

I've concluded that women are more sick and twisted than men.

 

I think that's admirable, and kind of hot.

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I've concluded that women are more sick and twisted than men.

 

I think that's admirable, and kind of hot.

 

 

Perv.

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Aaaah.... each depiction more charming than the last.

 

If only all of us could have baby pictures featuring the means and method of our demise.... well... I can dream, can't I?

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If only all of us could have baby pictures featuring the means and method of our demise....

 

My family has a history of heart disease. When I read this comment I could just visualize myself as baby propped up next to a huge diseased heart. Ewww... not exactly a charming baby picture! Of course, a stroke is also a possibility. Maybe it would be baby noob and the giant brain. Then again, maybe not...

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Baby beneath mangled auto? Baby within shark's jaws? Baby atop mound of crack vials?

 

(I'm seeing a perverse coffee table book in the making, here...)

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(I'm seeing a perverse coffee table book in the making, here...)

 

 

Hmmm... my first thought was, "It will never sell!" But then again, it could become a true classic...

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Baby beneath mangled auto? Baby within shark's jaws? Baby atop mound of crack vials?

 

(I'm seeing a perverse coffee table book in the making, here...)

This is too funny. In the case of Jesus, since he was executed, perhaps we could have baby pics of other humans put to death depicting their baby pictures with a hangman's nooses behind them, or electric chairs, guillotines, a firing squad, a stoning pit, a stake with a pile of wood beneath it, etc.

 

It's disturbing to see those pics sentimentalizing the execution of human, representing a baby embracing the means of its own future elimination from life. Maybe we should make baby toys out of crosses? "coochy coochy coo... baby wanna play with your toy crucifix?" Good god, we're a strange species.

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  • Super Moderator

Looks pretty good, but I'm not crazy about Chinese food.

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Where the hell are International laws when you need them. Eating babies is only done by... atheists. Oh, never mind.... carry on.

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