Ouroboros Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 I'm sure the spirits know Hans, but I don't use those old fangled manual Ouija boards. Maybe you can use a make-shift board? Like take a cardboard, writer letters on it randomly, and then put a glass upside down on it, and ask for advice regarding the batteries. If you don't get an answer, it could be the spirits don't like your Mickey-Mouse version of an Ouija board, or they are offended by you getting an electrical. If you want to talk to elephant spirits, what kind of Ouija board must you use? Is it necessary to use a board proportional in size to the actual being who died? The elephant Ouija board would be like a 10 feet by 10 feet plate! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legion Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 Are you making fun of me and my electric Ouija board Hans? Don't make me mess you up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 Are you making fun of me and my electric Ouija board Hans? Don't make me mess you up. I don't think the Ouija board gives you the power to control the spirits, only to ask them questions, so ha-ha, you can't get me with your spells... unless you're a trained 3rd level warlock. (You're not a trained 3rd level warlock, by chance? ... ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legion Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 I have unmeasurable mojo Hans. And I'll mess you up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 And no, I'm not making fun of you, only fun of your contemporary electrical magical board. Don't you know the spirits have negative effects on electrical circuits? The board might be malfunctioning for every encounter and you wouldn't know! I don't think tinfoil really helps protecting the cables from corporeal influences. Mojo or not, ectoplasm is not to play around with, it leaves stains on the circuit boards. And watch out for the angry cold ghosts too, who can freeze your stuff. Most plastics aren't really made for those encounters, and the plastic will crack. Trust me, old fashion equipment is more durable, and well worth the cost. Pure bat blood is hard to get by thought nowadays, and a bit expensive, but I heard rat blood have about 90% the same effect but for half the price. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hereticzero Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 A friend of mine that was in the occult-turned-christian once told me he had nightmares of his ouija board. He had buried it but he 'felt it calling him.' So he took me to where he buried it, I wrapped an iron chain around it and buried it again with salt on it for purification. To date, my friend has no more nightmares about this ouija board. I don't believe in it but he did. Now he does not believe such superstition but he still won't go dig up the board. I think a person has better chance of summoning demons with a can of beans and a quart of Tequila. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 I think a person has better chance of summoning demons with a can of beans and a quart of Tequila. Yes, that has been proven to be working. But you can never say which demon will come. It's random. I think they use some kind of queue ticket system to figure out which demon will go next. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 Don't worry, LR, here ya go... It's even electronic, sort of: http://www.museumoftalkingboards.com/WebOuija.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted January 20, 2009 Share Posted January 20, 2009 It's your lucky day! I asked the Web Ouija, "Where do the batteries go in Legion's electric Ouija board?" It said "Someplace new." Now just put your batteries someplace new and have fun with your electric Ouija board! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Casey Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 ShackledNoMore, I asked that Ouija Board you directed us too, how old I was. I'd have thought the spirits would know that at least. I asked it two times and both times, got the answer "No". What does this mean, no as in "no" or is it some spirit shorthand for "I don't no"? (Pun intended) Casey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted January 21, 2009 Share Posted January 21, 2009 I had to try that, too, Casey. It was a little more positive with me, answering "yes," probably grateful that I passed the link along. Since it was so willing, I rephrased the question to read "How many years old am I?" Turns out that I am 13 years old. And now that my ruse has been exposed, I must apologize to you, to Legion, to Kevin, to Hans, to Webmaster Dave, to HelloWorld, who started this topic, and to all here at ex-c for passing myself off as a middle-aged guy. The Magic Web Ouija has spoken! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neon Genesis Posted January 22, 2009 Share Posted January 22, 2009 The story in the opening post sounds like some of the events might have happened in reality but the supernatural elements are obviously exaggerated. Don't forget that in xtianity, mental disorders are often confused with demon possession, so maybe this lady was suffering from a mental disorder. Like she could have had anything from depression to split personality. The whole thing about her nephew coming to save her and the Ouija board flying out of her lap to the other side of the room sounds obviously fabricated to me. If she was in a trance at the time, how would she have known if the board flew out of her lap or not? It's just as likely that her nephew could have knocked it out of her lap, but if she was really being controlled by the demons, I fail to see how she could have known all the details happening around her at the time. Maybe what really happened was she had some mental disorder that caused her a lot of suffering and she could have been at a low point in her life where the demons insulting her was really herself constantly putting her down while dabbling in supernatural rituals to take away her pain of this life. While she was busy practicing the occult, maybe she wasn't paying attention to the kids in the house who accidentally started a fire, so her nephew came in the room and told her what happened, so she got the kids out of the house. Maybe she later blamed herself for not paying more attention to the kids. But rather than encouraging her to seek medical help for her disorders, her church told her that it was her "demons" that caused it to happen and that she should repent of her sin of dabbling in the occult and convert to xtianity. The lady could have accepted their explanation as true to make herself feel better to make up for her mistakes and convinced herself their version of the story is the true account of what happened and then later embellished the story to make herself feel better. Of course, it's also likely she just made the whole thing up to make herself look holy and perfect. The lady comes across as sounding rather pompous and arrogant as she kept bragging about how wise and perfect she was the whole time, which makes her sound more like a Mary Sue archetype in a cheesy fanfic rather than an actual believable person. I've found in my experiences with xtianity that fundies won't hesitate to spread lies about others to further their own agendas, so it's possible they could have fabricated this whole story as a means of self-promotion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentLoner Posted February 3, 2009 Share Posted February 3, 2009 I used to have a glow-in-the-dark ouija board that my uncle gave me, never really used it cos I didn't trust other people to be honest, and I have to admit I was somewhat afraid (still stuck to catholicism then). Sold it on Amazon a while ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deadego7 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 I'm just going to add a little experience of mine with an Ouija board and see what you guys think of it. Mind...I never really touch the moving piece (not directly on it, just hovering over it but close enough to not lose focus on the damn thing). But a few years back when it was summer time and when I would return to the school system, I would enter Junior High. I was sitting downstairs at probably 11 pm-1/2am in the morning with an Ouija board on my lap. I was just asking questions about what I needed to do and what I wanted to find it. I was still obsessed with a crush on this boy I had back in Intermediate school, and I had heard he wouldn't be returning to the school district. So I had asked if he's coming back to this district. The piece went to yes, and then in my head but not my hands on the piece, I asked "Why is he coming back?" Just then, I started seeing someone being pushed in the hospital on a gurney, and then that was it. So I hypothesized the reason my crush is staying because that must be his dad in the hospital. But I felt that his dad would die. So when I returned to school and got into my 7th year, and months after being in it, I asked my best friend Tory (who had classes with my crush) to ask him why he's back here. What I found out was very shocking: My little vision wasn't so far off. His dad was in the hospital because of his liver, and he wasn't sure if he was going to make it or not. The chance of death was likely. So...I went through that year being so depressed and distressed and when next year came, he never returned. Either his father really had passed away, or it was better he just leave. Either way, I did get what I was asking for; another year being around my crush. Just really fucked up otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharkindeepwater Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 What does this teach us? It teaches us to carry our cell phones when we summon our eldritch forces! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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