leftovers Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Congratulations to the both of you for being intellectually and rationally honest with yourselves. I must say that I am extremely jealous... possibly covet????.... that both of you were able to go through this together. I'd think that is a source of strength in an otherwise uncertain time. I've found my journey, to be extremely difficult as my spouse is at exactly the opposite point in life. You should be very glad that you were able to go through this together, as you will find that is not the case for many. I do want to say, though, that I disagree that Christians respond in anger to deconversion out of fear. Imagine that you have something very important to you and you raise your kids to believe that also. You would probably be angry if they disassociated themselves from that in which you so strongly believed. So, although I see your point, I think it is more anger arising out of disappointment that you've intentionally rejected things important to them, than anger arising from fear. Regardless, I feel like a jackass since my first post here is at least partially a disagreement. Sorry about that... I could very well be wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowabunga Jones Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 So, although I see your point, I think it is more anger arising out of disappointment that you've intentionally rejected things important to them, than anger arising from fear. Regardless, I feel like a jackass since my first post here is at least partially a disagreement. Sorry about that... I could very well be wrong. Leftovers, Instead of being very wrong, I believe you are correct. I actually was a youth pastor and so many of the adults we knew in the church were also parents of the students I worked with. That has indeed caused the knee-jerk disconnect we have felt from them. However, there has been a bit of unmistakably hostile anger thrown in there. I think once that kind of stuff starts happening you start to get paranoid that every Christian you have ever known thinks of you in that way now. On a different note, welcome to ExChristian! I feel deeply for the division faith (or the lack there of) has caused in your marriage. For Prysm and I, we both came to our conclusions through an intellectual study. I know nothing of your wife, but I do know that questions are eventually led us to answers (and in many cases were our answers). The socratic method is one of the best ways to show a person just how often their faith must become "blind" to the things their god has claimed to have done. I would be very interested to read a post by you on where your wife is at spiritually and how you as a (I presume) ExChristian have delt with that. Again, welcome to this community. Prysm and I have found a sense of intellectually open acceptance here. My hope is that you do as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LBW Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Prysm and Cowagunga, how are things going for you guys, particularly with regards to your families' reactions to your deconversion? Have you managed to meet any nonreligious friends? Still attending the atheist meetups? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane of the Jungle Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Hi guys, Prysm and Cowabungajones, you guys left the church because you've figured the bible's stories doesnt match up very well, as all of us did. But the thing that is bothering me is: Dont you guys and lot of the members of this site think that: Alot of Pastors, Ministers and Priest might have figured this maybe a long time ago already and only keep it for themselves, for financial and security reasons perhaps? Ministers in our country study 7yr, so even if they find out (it's actually all a book made up from all kind of myths and written by ppl who thought earth was flat and didnt know lightening was a natural thing and not send by Gods) they just cant leave church because there is no where else to go. In fact, Pastors in our country benefit so much out of ppl giving money to the church (perhaps out of guilt feelings) Pastors got houses value over 4 million and some members of the church not even food to eat! How does ppl like that, live with themselves and even more, if they realised there is no God and still go on? Is it perhaps an entertainment business they're in? (according to them) What do all of you think of this? BTW Prysm and Cowabungajones I also think that what you guys did, was very brave and I really dont care what ppl say, we are not evil ppl, in my heart I am still the same person, only changed the way I think, some ppl are only SCARED to think harder, scared of what they MAY find ;-) Would be great hearing from all! Have a great day all :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pitchu Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Welcome to the forums, Jane of the Jungle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest QuidEstCaritas? Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 One of the most sobering realizations I have had is that there are very few true examples of "unconditional" love, and religious affiliations work to destroy those few that there are. Usually if someone is telling me that they will "love me unconditionally" I know right away that the person in question is deluding themselves unless they are already a close friend. And since ulterior motives go hand in hand with delusion, I usually cut those kinds of people off eventually (emotional cutoff). "Unconditional" love is very rare and requires trust to be built up over a very long period of time. It's not something that someone can just "give" you. Anyone who says otherwise needs to do a reality check (IMHO). Need to, not being the same thing as can do or will do. They need to nonetheless. P.S. Unconditional love really can only occur under the right conditions, and those right conditions are probably always preceded by lots and lots of trust and conditional love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hudsonrw Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I just read your post. It's an inspiration to me. I recently broke away from my Christian life and "came out of the closet" with my disbelief as well. I'm glad to have you here! I think we are all apart of something great here. Our voice must be heard and the more I stay here reading posts, it seems to me that more and more people are coming to truth. And truth is reason. Rob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane of the Jungle Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Welcome to the forums, Jane of the Jungle. Thanx Pichu Kind of you and I must say I really enjoy all you guys and gals conversation! Take Care :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I may be the 20th person to say this, but you're really lucky to have gone through it together. It's a tough process no matter what, but I imagine it helps to have someone else talk to and relate with and support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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