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Awkward Feeling In Response To Xian Rituals And Phrases


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Does anyone else get this weird feeling when they hear certain words like Christ, Jesus, etc. or when they hear someone praying, speaking in tongues, or during any other xian rituals? I always have even when I was a kid and still being indoctrinated into xianity. Hearing people pray, especially if they're praying for me, and people speaking in tongues makes me feel the most awkward. I was always taught that these feelings meant that you were possessed by a demon, so I just kept them to myself. Now that I don't believe that anymore, I'm starting to wonder why I feel this way and always have. Has anyone else experienced this?

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I always thought praying, and especially praying out loud was weird. I never wanted to do it. Most prayers were about the same anyway. I thought early on --why can't he just hear my thoughts?

 

Later on, I went to a church where there was a liturgy, which made more sense to me. But still I thought that he must already know.

 

People just pray to hear themselves talk or impress others.

 

I was never from a Church that did speaking in tongues, for which I am grateful.

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Went to a wedding a few years back. My first time in a church post-deconversion. A former youth group "friends" was getting married. The main reason I attended was because she had NOT been a snobby bitch.

 

And yeah. I did feel uncomfortable. Of course, part of that was being around former friends too, but most of them took little notice of my presence (I was always on the outskirts of the group anyway).

 

I went to the wedding of a friend a little more recently, and I was outraged and on the point of standing up to tell the minister off (respect for my friend was all that held me back). This friend was pretty much going through the socially accepted motions, wasn't a member of this particular church even, so the minister didn't really know her. What he DID know was what we all knew...she was quite obviously pregnant.

 

And he insulted her. I don't know if anyone else picked up on it...you can get away with a LOT if you 1 - have "authority" and 2 - speak with a kindly tone and a smile. But he did. He flat out insulted her. At HER wedding! Pissed me off!

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I always thought praying, and especially praying out loud was weird. I never wanted to do it.

 

I was the same way. I think I might've been uncomfortable about it because for me, it was a very private thing and I kind of saw these things as glimpsing at another person's soul or something, if that makes sense. It was just something that I believed to be very intimate and shouldn't be done out in the open whenever. Doesn't it say in the bible somewhere that you shouldn't flaunt your beliefs and pray out loud anyway?

 

 

People just pray to hear themselves talk or impress others.

 

I have to say I agree with this, especially the people who make up huge prayers.

 

I was never from a Church that did speaking in tongues, for which I am grateful.

 

I actually never belonged to a church that did this. My mom and her friend believed in this and they would sometimes do this over the phone. It was incredibly weird and awkward. My little sister at one time decided that she could do it, too, and she would walk around babbling and singing VBS songs. Ick.

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I always thought praying, and especially praying out loud was weird. I never wanted to do it. Most prayers were about the same anyway. I thought early on --why can't he just hear my thoughts?

 

Later on, I went to a church where there was a liturgy, which made more sense to me. But still I thought that he must already know.

 

People just pray to hear themselves talk or impress others.

 

I was never from a Church that did speaking in tongues, for which I am grateful.

^this. I rarely prayed and when I did I prayed silently.

 

Never went to a liturgy church though.

 

And yes, most of the people who prayed at church, in group prayer, were very long-winded. They normally ranked high in the church's in-crowd too. I think they really liked hearing themselves talk and wanted to show off.

 

And re: the whole speaking in tongues- I was Baptist. Baptists generally seem to think that speaking in tongues was mostly just insanity. Though my parents occasionally muse that they should take my sister and I to a Pentecostal church, just so we see what the services are like...

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Come to think of it, another thing I didn't like was this foot-washing ritual. They would do this in the liturgical (Episcopal) church around Easter. Jeez, I'm glad I don't have to see that awkward production again.

 

This isn't the desert in Israel 2,000 years ago. It doesn't mean the same thing. Get real.

 

No one really wanted to do this. The priest would be practically begging people to come up so the vestry of the church could put some water on their feet and wipe it off. I never wanted to do it either, and I did not. Always kind of felt like I should do this stuff -- this, and praying and soul winning and other mess that the preacher or priest would want done. Maybe the extroverted people would who like to talk could do these things, but not me, who was shy and introverted. These activities always made me feel like there was something wrong with me.

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It really depends on the extent to which they display such behavior. If I see some street preacher shouting "YOU'RE A GONNA GO TO HELLLLLLL" from a corner, I usually experience a combination of mild amusement, pity, and finally disgust.

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I always thought praying, and especially praying out loud was weird. I never wanted to do it. Most prayers were about the same anyway. I thought early on --why can't he just hear my thoughts?

 

Later on, I went to a church where there was a liturgy, which made more sense to me. But still I thought that he must already know.

 

People just pray to hear themselves talk or impress others.

 

I was never from a Church that did speaking in tongues, for which I am grateful.

 

I've often found public prayer to be bizzare, and a direct violation of Jesus's words in Matthew 6:5-8:

 

"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by men. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. And in praying do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him."

 

No one takes Jesus words seriously, least of all Christians.

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I haven't seen him in a while but...

 

There used to be this older middle-aged dude who would stand outside the student union building at my school. He had this metal cart of old religious or Jesus flyers of some sort (I never got a good look at them), and he would stand there with one in his hand chanting, trance-like:

 

"Jesus Christ is eternal life. You are in hell without Jesus. Come to Jesus. Jesus Christ is eternal life. You are in hell without Jesus..."

 

It was SOOOOOOOO damned awkard...I even thought so as a Christian. Oh, it made me shudder when I had to walk by him...I could hardly even bear to look up at him. He sounded like a never ending broken record. And he said things in such a trance like manner that it took me a couple of years to decipher exactly what he was saying in some of his sentences. Especially the, "You're in hell without Jesus", one.

 

 

---

 

Also, I have always felt UBER awkward when seeing this...and I am sure you will be able to picture it:

 

Some women is kneeling in a pew. He has one hand raised in the air and the other across her chest. Her eyes are closed, and her lips are moving slightly. She looks like a tear might run down her face at any moment and she has that stereotypical "I can feel feel Jesus's love and peace" look on her face. Oh yeah...and she has a slight smile or frown...it depends....

 

AGHRRRRRRR that drives me NUTS. I get the heeby jeebies just looking at people like that. My mom does it (minus the hand in the air) when she comes back from communion. It makes me feel so awkward I can't even look at her. I just bury my head in the pew or look the other way.

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And he insulted her. I don't know if anyone else picked up on it...you can get away with a LOT if you 1 - have "authority" and 2 - speak with a kindly tone and a smile. But he did. He flat out insulted her. At HER wedding! Pissed me off!

 

Kinda makes me wonder what he said to insult her. But as stated above, Christians are instructed to NOT pray publicly; of course they won't follow that because they want to show how holy they are.

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Does anyone else get this weird feeling when they hear certain words like Christ, Jesus, etc. or when they hear someone praying, speaking in tongues, or during any other xian rituals? I always have even when I was a kid and still being indoctrinated into xianity. Hearing people pray, especially if they're praying for me, and people speaking in tongues makes me feel the most awkward. I was always taught that these feelings meant that you were possessed by a demon, so I just kept them to myself. Now that I don't believe that anymore, I'm starting to wonder why I feel this way and always have. Has anyone else experienced this?

 

There's a good parallel to this in the movie "The Matrix". Neo always felt something was wrong with the world around him. When Morpheus and company release him from it, he sees the world the way it really is. When they go back into The Matrix, to consult the Oracle, Neo sees old places he remembers from growing up, but realizes that it's all an illusion, and it no longer has a hold on him. I believe the same holds true for leaving Christianity. Even once we've left the faith, we can still have awkward feelings when reminded of our old lives ,but we need to remember we were living lives of illusion and we're better off knowing the truth.

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I always thought praying, and especially praying out loud was weird. I never wanted to do it. Most prayers were about the same anyway. I thought early on --why can't he just hear my thoughts?

 

Later on, I went to a church where there was a liturgy, which made more sense to me. But still I thought that he must already know.

 

People just pray to hear themselves talk or impress others.

 

I was never from a Church that did speaking in tongues, for which I am grateful.

 

I've often found public prayer to be bizzare, and a direct violation of Jesus's words in Matthew 6:5-8:

 

"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by men. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. And in praying do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him."

 

No one takes Jesus words seriously, least of all Christians.

 

 

ME TOO! Boy, when I was still a Christian I used to really "squirm" when someone would pray out loud because I knew the bible said not to do it. The thing of placing your hand on the bible to swear an oath always bugged me too because the bible says to let your yes be yes and your no be no....and not to take oaths. I used to think I was the only christian who actually read the bible.

 

I was also, and still do, hate it when someone will say, with eyes glazed over, "I'm so blessed" from anything to a death in the family to a bowel movement.

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Though my parents occasionally muse that they should take my sister and I to a Pentecostal church, just so we see what the services are like...

 

Stay away. Stay farrrrr away. You aren't missing much.

 

Although it is somewhat amusing to watch them work themselves into a frenzy and get "slain in the spirit" as they flop around on the floor babbling nonsensical gibberish, the amusement dies out quickly as you realize just how delusional and sad it all is.

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I haven't seen him in a while but...

 

There used to be this older middle-aged dude who would stand outside the student union building at my school. He had this metal cart of old religious or Jesus flyers of some sort (I never got a good look at them), and he would stand there with one in his hand chanting, trance-like:

 

"Jesus Christ is eternal life. You are in hell without Jesus. Come to Jesus. Jesus Christ is eternal life. You are in hell without Jesus..."

 

It was SOOOOOOOO damned awkard...I even thought so as a Christian. Oh, it made me shudder when I had to walk by him...I could hardly even bear to look up at him. He sounded like a never ending broken record. And he said things in such a trance like manner that it took me a couple of years to decipher exactly what he was saying in some of his sentences. Especially the, "You're in hell without Jesus", one.

 

There's a guy like that in Milwaukee who drives around downtown with a huge megaphone atop his car. Hysterical as fuck. Especially when we still had GenCon; he'd make sure to pass by all the geeky gamers in their costumes blaring BS through his megaphone. His car is just festooned with Christian statements and bumper stickers and it looks like someone with palsy decorated it. (Not to be mean to anyone with palsy; but the writing is just that skewed and shitty.) Bit of a downtown tradition, he is.

 

I can't really relate to any akwardness around prayer, though. For all my mom complains about me being an athiest, she's not exactly a practicing Catholic, and that pretty much sums up both sides of my family, Lutheran as well. I've sat through a prayer at dinner a few times when I'd go visit my roommate's family, but all I did was sit and wait, and they surprisingly never bothered me. (Yes, Christians who respect my non-religious choices do amazingly exist.) And then there were the born-agains who harassed me at work, but they didn't pray at me, they kept roping customers into praying with them, to which I rolled my eyes and ignored them. Generally I just wait it out. I figure if they have a mental condition that demands a minute or so of them babbling to themselves, I may as well give them space.

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I've often found public prayer to be bizzare, and a direct violation of Jesus's words in Matthew 6:5-8:

 

"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by men. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. And in praying do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him."

 

No one takes Jesus words seriously, least of all Christians.

 

Exactly!

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Come to think of it, another thing I didn't like was this foot-washing ritual. They would do this in the liturgical (Episcopal) church around Easter. Jeez, I'm glad I don't have to see that awkward production again.

 

This isn't the desert in Israel 2,000 years ago. It doesn't mean the same thing. Get real.

 

No one really wanted to do this. The priest would be practically begging people to come up so the vestry of the church could put some water on their feet and wipe it off. I never wanted to do it either, and I did not. Always kind of felt like I should do this stuff -- this, and praying and soul winning and other mess that the preacher or priest would want done. Maybe the extroverted people would who like to talk could do these things, but not me, who was shy and introverted. These activities always made me feel like there was something wrong with me.

 

 

YES!! I hated this ritual as well. I went to a youth camp where they did this one night and it was so strange. During the trip I had a little disagreement with one my friends. (she was jealous and pissed off that I was having in a little romantic fling with one of the boys I had met there. Of course she claimed she was just concerned for my spiritual wellbeing) and that night she cried begged me to wash my feet I guess as a gesture of apology. Even though I was a hXc xtian at the time it made me feel so awkward I just couldn't accept, much to her disappointment.

 

I had a friend who told me about a xtian wedding he recently went to where they did a foot washing ritual where the bride washed the groom's feet, but never the other way around. I assume they were not using it in the biblical context where it is meant to symbolize a leader humbling him/herself and and serving the follower. They were using it to symbolize the bride's submission to the groom. GAG!!!

 

 

All the things mentioned in the original post are also made me feel awkward even when I was a xtian. Spirituality always seemed so personal and intimate to me. I still don't understand the need for the massive displays of faith.

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Has anyone else experienced this?

 

I actually went to my first bible study the other day as a de-converted Xian, and thought I might feel uncomfortable, but was pleasantly surprised that I wasnt't. The patio home development I live in has a weekly bible study which my wife and father-in-law go to and I decided to attend last week. My attitude before and during the experience was one of just learning and gaining knowledge, nothing more nothing less. They were reading in Genesis and thought I have nothing to lose just from reading about these ancient mythical stories. Back when I was a Xian, I had formed friendships with these people and now that I am an Ex-C, don't think I should just throw that away. They are good people and enjoy being around them. My wife now knows I'm an atheist, but the others don't and in all honesty don't feel the need to confess that to them. The only time I will draw the line is if they ask me to pray...I wouldn't be true to myself then. So in this present day, I just have a Zen attitude about it and am not threatened by any association with those of the Xian faith. Now that I know of the man-made myths and corruption in religion, it no longer has validity to me and is dismissed.

 

The only time I've felt uncomfortable back when I was a Xian, was maybe going to some radical pentecostal services. The emotional frenzy and hype was just way over the top and hope to never witness that again.

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Come to think of it, another thing I didn't like was this foot-washing ritual. They would do this in the liturgical (Episcopal) church around Easter. Jeez, I'm glad I don't have to see that awkward production again.

 

This isn't the desert in Israel 2,000 years ago. It doesn't mean the same thing. Get real.

 

No one really wanted to do this. The priest would be practically begging people to come up so the vestry of the church could put some water on their feet and wipe it off. I never wanted to do it either, and I did not. Always kind of felt like I should do this stuff -- this, and praying and soul winning and other mess that the preacher or priest would want done. Maybe the extroverted people would who like to talk could do these things, but not me, who was shy and introverted. These activities always made me feel like there was something wrong with me.

 

In my undergrad bible college, they did a footwashing thing a couple times. It was specifically for people who had been harboring some negative feelings toward another person to symbolize forgiveness. The thing I just can't get over is how that must have felt for anyone who randomly got asked to have their feet washed. I mean, do you really want to go up and have your feet washed in public by someone who has basically admitted that they have hated you and are now "over it"? I think that sort of thing would bring more trouble than peace. I never asked or was asked to participate, but I wouldn't have. I probably would have given whoever it was the finger and told them they could continue to dislike me if they wanted. Actually, that's probably why I never got asked. Ugh. What a sickening parade. If you're going to forgive someone, just do it. I mean, who gets the glory? You know that everyone watching is thinking, "Oh, how humble of ________! I wonder what ____________ did to need such a significant display of forgiveness!" Oh, man! Maybe I should have taken all the financial aid crew and the president of the school, lined them up in a row, and washed their feet to symbolize their robbing the students blind with their outrageous price for such worthless teaching and their terrible business ethics that cost hundreds of students thousands of dollars.

 

If I could do one thing, I would stand up in the front of that chapel and tell them all to go to hell. I hate that fucking place.

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I went to Catholic masses when I was very young, and to this day, when I watch Star wars, and someone says "May the Force be with you" I respond in my head "and also with you, Father."

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And he insulted her. I don't know if anyone else picked up on it...you can get away with a LOT if you 1 - have "authority" and 2 - speak with a kindly tone and a smile. But he did. He flat out insulted her. At HER wedding! Pissed me off!

 

Kinda makes me wonder what he said to insult her. But as stated above, Christians are instructed to NOT pray publicly; of course they won't follow that because they want to show how holy they are.

 

He had a little mini-sermon where he admonished being "worldly" and insinuated things regarding sins of the flesh. (I really wish I could recall his exact words)

 

Nice thing to be saying when the woman paying you is quite visibly seven months pregnant. There is no place for that high and mighty shit when you are supposed to be celebrating the joining of two people. Especially when getting paid to do it.

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Though my parents occasionally muse that they should take my sister and I to a Pentecostal church, just so we see what the services are like...

 

Stay away. Stay farrrrr away. You aren't missing much.

 

Although it is somewhat amusing to watch them work themselves into a frenzy and get "slain in the spirit" as they flop around on the floor babbling nonsensical gibberish, the amusement dies out quickly as you realize just how delusional and sad it all is.

 

See it's like this-------------as long as you do some bizarre shit like that in a church---------it's OK----it's religion. If some homeless person on the street does the exact same thing, they get locked up for vagrancy or as a disorderly person, or they get sent off to the bin as complete loons and get (hopefully) psychotherapy.

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And he insulted her. I don't know if anyone else picked up on it...you can get away with a LOT if you 1 - have "authority" and 2 - speak with a kindly tone and a smile. But he did. He flat out insulted her. At HER wedding! Pissed me off!

 

Kinda makes me wonder what he said to insult her. But as stated above, Christians are instructed to NOT pray publicly; of course they won't follow that because they want to show how holy they are.

 

He had a little mini-sermon where he admonished being "worldly" and insinuated things regarding sins of the flesh. (I really wish I could recall his exact words)

 

Nice thing to be saying when the woman paying you is quite visibly seven months pregnant. There is no place for that high and mighty shit when you are supposed to be celebrating the joining of two people. Especially when getting paid to do it.

 

I'd have told the son of a bitch I wanted a refund.

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Prayer in itself never bothered me but even when I was a xtian, I used to always feel uncomfortable about praying in public. Like whenever my family went out to eat with my grandparents, my grandparents would always want to say a prayer before meals every time. I always felt awkward doing this and wondered why they just can't say the prayer to themselves because didn't Jesus say not to pray to be seen by others? I also never understood why my grandparents would always say the prayer before every single freaking meal. I could understand saying the prayer before a big feast or something but even if they were just having a bolonga sandwich for lunch, they would still say the prayer. This still makes me feel awkward because whenever we visit my grandmother and there isn't another male around, I always have to be the one to lead the prayer even if we're just having a freaking bolonga sandwich for lunch. I haven't come out as an atheist to my family yet so I have to say the prayer.

 

Sometimes I'll say they should just do it themselves silently but most of the time they just ignore me and insist I have to say it anyway. I don't get why the men always have to be the one to say the prayer either. It's not like they're teaching to men by praying or anything but to me this ritual of having men say the blessing at the table seems frankly sexist. Also, when I was a xtian, I used to feel uncomfortable about the whole swearing on the bible thing and I used to think people were going to hell for doing that. I used to wonder what I would do if I was ever called to serve jury duty and I had to swear by the bible. I don't think people are going to hell for doing it anymore but I still wonder why xtians will swear by the bible when it clearly says not to swear an oath at all. And as a xtian, I used to feel awkward whenever a xtian would say "I swear" or speak the Lord's name in vain.

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