twolives Posted February 5, 2010 Share Posted February 5, 2010 Hi All, I registered on here a long time ago, but I have now decided to try and make and effort to become part of the community here. My reasons for leaving evangelicalisim where published on the main blog ages ago if you are interested: http://exchristian.net/exchristian/2008/03/why-i-cannot-honestly-call-myself.html I really am struggling at the mo, I am a father of three and husband of a wife whom I love. However I am VERY alone in my rejection of religion and it's hard. I work hard all day, and work hard with the kids in any free time I have. So feeling alone with having no time to think not a great combo! Don't think my wife will ever come round. She rights her prayers in a book. I secretly read them the other day. A book full of pleading for me. It's all heartbreaking. It's designed to divide. Also any regular posters from the UK? The good news is the TwoLives tag I chose a year agon or so is no longer valid. I have one life and everyone knows- so that is a small relief. Really appreciate a bit of dialouge etc.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shyone Posted February 5, 2010 Share Posted February 5, 2010 Don't think my wife will ever come round. She rights her prayers in a book. I secretly read them the other day. A book full of pleading for me. It's all heartbreaking. It's designed to divide. I'm not from the UK, but I do have a Christian wife. She's what I call a "nominal" christian who does not go to church, but she does occasionally stick me when I ridicule religion or religious people. If her prayers were so easy to find and read, I suspect she meant for you to read them. If you had a diary and wrote, "Her beliefs are driving us apart. I don't know how much longer I can take it", she might be similarly affected - not that I'm suggesting you do that. You didn't say what denomination she is, but sometimes couples can "compromise". The Unitarian Universalist churches are "neutral." The exposure to other people's beliefs might make a difference to her, but then she may like the comfort and security of a single set of "rules." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kazza Posted February 5, 2010 Share Posted February 5, 2010 Hi, just a quick reply, (i have to get back to the kids) to say hi - i am in the Uk - merseyside to be exact...i am lucky that my husband looked at the evidence with me and our deconversion was equal in timing. i was brought up very christian and cant believe it took me so long to see through the stupidity of if all. I really feel for you in your situation - my mum is as fervently christian as ever and i have yet to even tell her i no longer believe although i hope to remedy this soon. I can imagine, once she is informed of my new beliefs or lack thereof that if she had a prayer diary it would contain similar pleadings etc - its so very sad. Has she read the evidence against christianity for herself or is she not willing to even think about it? I read "godless' by dan barker - that was a good one to explain everything in a clear easy way. Must go but hope you find some support and help here :0) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted February 5, 2010 Super Moderator Share Posted February 5, 2010 Welcome to the playground. There are a few around here from the UK as I recall. Hope we can help a bit in some way or other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRDWarrior Posted February 6, 2010 Share Posted February 6, 2010 Welcome (back I guess, but that was before I found the site)! I'm not from the UK, or married to a christian (hubby is currently deist as close as I can tell), but wanted to say hi and let you know I hope things can be remedied for you, or at least made relatively peaceful on the homefront! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dichotomy Posted February 7, 2010 Share Posted February 7, 2010 Hi there, I'm in the UK. I've been lurking for a while but a very recent poster. My husband *became* an atheist about 3 years ago now and I finally admitted I was no longer a Christian early last year. Not quite sure if I'm agnostic or atheist just yet, I keep changing my mind... Anyway I feel for you as I realise how difficult it is to be in a marriage where one is a Christian and one is not and when children are involved (although obviously I was the *xian* partner for a couple of years). I think my husband found the whole thing very difficult and there was unspoken tension between us for quite some time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
★ Citsonga ★ Posted February 7, 2010 Share Posted February 7, 2010 Greetings! I thought that it wouldn't be all that difficult to find irreligious people in the UK, but perhaps my impression was a bit faulty. I also felt fairly alone for a few years in my rejection of the faith, since all my close friends & family were (and still are, to the best of my knowledge) christians. Then last year I found this community, and from a recommendation here I found out about meetup.com, which led me to a monthly freethinkers meetup not too far from here. It was a breath of fresh air to have people to talk to who shared my disbelief in religion and my desire to have a rational approach to life. I just looked up meetup.com and it has United Kingdom as a location option. I couldn't get it to give me UK groups, but perhaps that's because my ISP is in the USA. You could check it out and see if it works for you, and perhaps you could find some friends that way. Good luck.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dB-Paradox Posted February 7, 2010 Share Posted February 7, 2010 Hey, My wife is a Christian also. I do not expect her to come around either. However, we've been able to talk some things out. My sense of humor can be quite crude, and she does take my jokes on religion to be a personal attack. Yet we are able to maintain a good marriage otherwise. As far as feeling alone, I think many here can understand. I was fortunate to find a local freethinkers group, but my wife despises me going to any meetings. I'm doing what I can to compromise and let her know that my family comes first...but I'm not going to fry myself alive to prove it. I hope you find a group of support as well as a balance at home. But if nothing else, I find this place is a great place! Take care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twolives Posted February 7, 2010 Author Share Posted February 7, 2010 Thanks all for replying. It really is a great "blessing" lol. Seriously I appreciate it... Those from the UK do you know of any groups/get togethers for UK ex-christians? I have my suspicions that there is less of a community being less of a fundamentalist country to start with. So if you were a fundie, there is by definition less people who will understand the angst... Dichotomy- your husband is lucky! I hope my wife follows your sensible path! Off to see what others are talking about here now.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kazza Posted February 7, 2010 Share Posted February 7, 2010 Check out http://www.humanism.org.uk/home It has a link to groups - i found one in our area - good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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